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infant custody input...

Posted by on Jul. 17, 2014 at 10:57 AM
  • 16 Replies
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So I'm due in September and I am not with the father of baby. Although we have been getting along pretty well its starting to get rocky because I have been pushing to talk about custody paperwork and visitation.

Although I dont doubt he will be a great dad not to comfortably with him having her overnight until she is older. He has no job and sleeps on his brothers couch. He helps watch his brothers kids who are 5 and 7 and he is great with them. But caring for an infant is alot different.

My fiance and I have agreed that he will be welcome in our home anytime to visit and be with her. Thinking about even allowing him to stay one night a week. I am planning on breastfeeding and dont want him to take her anywhere without me. He has no drivers license anyway. ...anyway just need some input on what is fair.

Thanks ladies :)
by on Jul. 17, 2014 at 10:57 AM
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Replies (1-10):
oliveoil423
by Member on Jul. 17, 2014 at 11:03 AM
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Try on settling on him coming over ever week to help out and all with out visitation papers or custody papers and see how that goes first. If it does go as plan the file for full custody.
paganbaby
by Chesty La Rue on Jul. 17, 2014 at 3:14 PM

What does he say about visitation?

I nursed my younger two and I have to tell you, they were not near ready for overnights away from me until they were at least three. If you're breastfeeding and baby won't take a bottle, they'll both have a miserable time if he pushes for longer visits or ovvernights.

lil_momma_vdv
by Member on Jul. 17, 2014 at 5:23 PM
He really hasn't said much about it...be was more stuck on the fact I didn't want him in the delivery room. However my fiance said that was kinda rude of me. However he has already mentioned that I dont allow him to do anything for her because I am with someone else. My fiance has bought everything for her because BD has no job.
Thelmama
by Thelma on Jul. 17, 2014 at 5:33 PM
1 mom liked this

Since you will be breast feeding hopefully y'all can work it out. I honestly have no advice but here is a bump.

hayliedlr
by JoAnna on Jul. 17, 2014 at 10:29 PM

with breast feeding it makes it a tad more complicated with him taking the baby for over nights.  What does he say about it?

cjsmom1
by Silver Member on Jul. 18, 2014 at 12:59 AM
2 moms liked this

Custody issues can be tricky. You need to go to court and draw up who has legal, medical, and financial rights for the baby. Without something stating you have custody your ex can take the baby/

mysticalmalissa
by Silver Member on Jul. 18, 2014 at 2:10 PM
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Why are you pointing out so many negitive things about your ex?? 

There is no reason you cant pump enough milk for him to have for over night visits.

If he can handle watching the other two kids, an infant will be a breeze. 

Give him a chance. 

Bonneata
by Bronze Member on Jul. 18, 2014 at 3:27 PM

Please don't take witnessing the birth of his child away from him because you are not together its unfair. I see were you are coming from on the over night visit. I think if the fiancĂ©e and baby daddy can get along for him to spend 1 night week why not at least in the begining and then as baby gets older make it one night a week overnight with daddy. Is this your first? Trust me with breast feeding you will be wishing for one night week of 8 hrs asleep. 

Quoting lil_momma_vdv: He really hasn't said much about it...be was more stuck on the fact I didn't want him in the delivery room. However my fiance said that was kinda rude of me. However he has already mentioned that I dont allow him to do anything for her because I am with someone else. My fiance has bought everything for her because BD has no job.


Kmakksmom
by Stefanie on Jul. 18, 2014 at 4:12 PM
He should be in the delivery room with you. As for visitation, unless you aren't able to pump enough, you could allow him to have yall's baby with him at his brother's house. If you don't feel like he's trustworthy, then have him over to help.
LeapBaby123
by Kathleen on Jul. 18, 2014 at 8:59 PM
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I don't have any advice, but I hope everything works out!
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