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When a child asks "Do you like my dad"

Posted by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 5:11 PM
  • 7 Replies

How do you answer this question?

My son every now and than will ask me this question.  I always answer it the same.  I tell him that while his father and I no longer love each other nor are we still together  I am still friendly with him and wish him well.  My son then tells me his dads answer which is always the same.  His response is "No I hate your mom".  And while I have no desire to see his father ever again I would never tell my child that, and wish his father would do the same.

by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 5:11 PM
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Replies (1-7):
RLSMOM59
by on Jun. 5, 2011 at 3:15 PM

Your answer to  your son is great. You can tell your son that you are not able to speak for him. However, they way he feels does not change the way you feel.

easinpc
by Silver Member on Oct. 5, 2011 at 3:51 PM

This topic came up again on Monday night with my son.  After our conversation about it he told me that when he grows up and gets married and has kids if anything ever happens and he ends up divorced he's going to make sure to never say bad things to the kids about their mom because he knows how not nice it is to have to listen to as a kid.  Made me happy and sad to hear that come from him.  Happy because he's learning from it, but sad that he's having to go through it :(

1likeme
by on Oct. 5, 2011 at 8:51 PM
I tell them that I don't like the way their dad treats me but I hope he has a good life.
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GraLauJon
by on Oct. 6, 2011 at 12:37 PM

yeah, my kids go thru the same.  the result is that they dont want to be around their dad anymore. our teenage son tells his dad to be good to me, even in divorce. he is disgusted and hardly ever speaks to his father, rarely goes anywhere with him b/c he badmouths me all the time. our girls go with him but cant spend much time with him. that's good enough. they are learning their own boundaries and feelings.  i tell them they can say they love him if they want b/c its their relationship with him. not to base it off of my feelings.  but i do love dad.  just in a different kind of way...b/c he is the father of my children. i dont have to hate him.  and they dont either.  we just accept things for what they are.

Peregrine
by Bronze Member on Oct. 6, 2011 at 2:12 PM
1 mom liked this

 I will tell them that I hope their father gets everything he deserves in life.  By the time they realize I'm referring to a raging case of bleeding hemorrhoids... well they will of figured out who he is all on their own.

easinpc
by Silver Member on Oct. 6, 2011 at 9:12 PM

This is a great way to answer it!

Quoting Peregrine:

 I will tell them that I hope their father gets everything he deserves in life.  By the time they realize I'm referring to a raging case of bleeding hemorrhoids... well they will of figured out who he is all on their own.


greenkat66
by on Oct. 6, 2011 at 9:19 PM

Just breaks my heart that his Dad is hurting his son so much and is so wrapped up in his own selfish hate that he can't see it. crying mini

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