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Divorce & Starting Over Divorce & Starting Over

Going to "trial" over support?!

Posted by on May. 2, 2012 at 9:15 AM
  • 11 Replies

I was just informed by my lawyer that I will have to go to trial this summer with my ex husband... over child support. After 2 years of non payment I got a lawyer and took him to court. Judge said I would claim my daughter every year since he only sees her 4 days a month and ordered child support withheld from his check. He wants to claim her every other year, is fighting back support and paying me back my attorney fees....  He actually said in front of the judge yesterday "this is unfair" ..... OMG!!! Need some help and support ladies.... This man has turned child support into a fight between him and I when its really about him helping support the child he helped make..

by on May. 2, 2012 at 9:15 AM
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Replies (1-10):
momofne
by on May. 2, 2012 at 9:20 AM

Stay strong! You know and I know and the courts will agree he is in the wrong. {{{HUGS}}}

Monsita
by Bronze Member on May. 2, 2012 at 10:12 PM
1 mom liked this

I am wishing you LUCK! good luck

HE IS ACTING LIKE A BABY INSTEAD OF A DAD!  I am hoping the court will see that!

I have not being back to court over an issue like this....I have no experience that...I can only wish you that JUSTICE WILL BE DONE TO YOU AND YOUR KID!

tottaxi
by Silver Member on May. 2, 2012 at 10:27 PM

He's trying to change a judge's decision?  And he is behind in his cs payments? 

I want whatever he's been smokin'...

GraLauJon
by on May. 3, 2012 at 7:59 AM


Quoting Monsita:

I am wishing you LUCK! good luck

HE IS ACTING LIKE A BABY INSTEAD OF A DAD!  I am hoping the court will see that!

I have not being back to court over an issue like this....I have no experience that...I can only wish you that JUSTICE WILL BE DONE TO YOU AND YOUR KID!

ha ha. my stbx always tells me to quit being a baby and then he throws the same temper tantrums. to the poster:  my stbx wants to take me to court too.  well, i dont even care anymore.  the reality is, the law is cracking down on deadbeat dads. your ex is getting himself into a lot of hot water.  sit back and watch. you wont have to contest a thing.  your ex cannot get out of paying support. 

wishbearmom
by on May. 3, 2012 at 11:41 AM

This. And I would suggest once there is a permanent court order, that you seek that the support is garnished from his wages so it's not up to him to pay when and if he feels like it. You will automatically receive that support for your children.

Quoting momofne:

Stay strong! You know and I know and the courts will agree he is in the wrong. {{{HUGS}}}


LiliM
by on May. 3, 2012 at 1:09 PM
1 mom liked this

Don't talk to him about it.  Let your atty do the talking.  The state has calculations that will determine what his obligation is. 

And unless he is current on CS - he doesn't get to ever claim her.  Not that you have to agree to it - your atty can fight it. 

Make sure you ask for garnishment, and that you have the collection handled by the state.  Keeps records, takes you out of looking for him to get a check, and makes it easier to take the tax return if he doesn't pay.

He can say anything he wants, as people headed to court can and do.  What really happens, what is within state guidelines, what a judge will order - whole 'nother story. 

Take a deep breath, give your atty any and all paperwork you have to support your claim.  Read and become familiar with the state support guidelines so you are aware of what you need to have for proof, what your obligations will be, etc.  THe more you know about the case law for your case, the better client you will be, and better advocate for yourself.

I would also start reading the custody guidelines, since usually, after a CS case is established, court ordered custody is next.  THe more you know, the better off you will be.

Good luck.

lilangilyn
by on May. 3, 2012 at 1:41 PM

My ex did a lot of this same type of thing. In the South we call it "poor mouthin" and it means that if you talk long and hard enough about how poor you are, people will believe it.

JezeBellyDancer
by on May. 3, 2012 at 1:55 PM

Don't know what state you are in, but in my state there are very cut and dried calculations they make to determine who is paying child support and how much. Here they automatically garnish the wages, so if he has a job, that can be done. They can also garnish any refund he gets from tax returns to help pay you back.

You have your child/ren the majority of the time, so you claim her on your taxes and stay firm about it.

My ex keeps trying to get me to pay the taxes on a college fund we have for our son, but he is the trustee and it's the trustee's responsibility to pay the taxes regardless who has custody. We go through this every year.

Do not talk to you ex about any of this now that lawyers are involved. If he has something to say, then he can go through your lawyer.

miss_AP
by on May. 3, 2012 at 6:13 PM

 Sounds like a pain, but on the positive side you will have some resolution soon!!

itsallforher
by on May. 3, 2012 at 10:16 PM

we have been in court since feb of this year over cs, he is two years behind so judge ordered wage garnishment and ruled that i would claim my daughter every year at first court date. Hes trying to challenge that judges decision on claiming her.  In my state he would have to have some serious ground to fight for custody (like drug use and prostitution). As of right now we have joint and I have physical. Since he has already signed off his rights to one child and the only thing I have ever done wrong is not wear my seatbelt I dont think custody will be an issue. My daughter already wants to come home early on "his" weekends. We dont speak unless its me telling him where to pick her up on his weekend. He doesnt even call during the week to talk to her at all.

Quoting LiliM:

Don't talk to him about it.  Let your atty do the talking.  The state has calculations that will determine what his obligation is. 

And unless he is current on CS - he doesn't get to ever claim her.  Not that you have to agree to it - your atty can fight it. 

Make sure you ask for garnishment, and that you have the collection handled by the state.  Keeps records, takes you out of looking for him to get a check, and makes it easier to take the tax return if he doesn't pay.

He can say anything he wants, as people headed to court can and do.  What really happens, what is within state guidelines, what a judge will order - whole 'nother story. 

Take a deep breath, give your atty any and all paperwork you have to support your claim.  Read and become familiar with the state support guidelines so you are aware of what you need to have for proof, what your obligations will be, etc.  THe more you know about the case law for your case, the better client you will be, and better advocate for yourself.

I would also start reading the custody guidelines, since usually, after a CS case is established, court ordered custody is next.  THe more you know, the better off you will be.

Good luck.


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