Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How did you handle...

Posted by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 11:41 AM
  • 14 Replies

 The first major holiday without your kids?  My DD8 and DD2 will be at STBX's and my DD17 is going over to her boyfriends family's house for Thanksgiving.  My dad and his wife are going to her family's house out of town.

This leaves me all alone. I was going to volunteer at the local community dinner with my friend and her DD10 & DD13, but we missed the sign up deadline.

My DD17 said she could see if I could go with her, but I don't know anyone there and I know I will be an emotional wreck. Really don't want to breakdown in front of a bunch of strangers. :-(

So I may just make myself my favorite dinner (salmon, potatoes, and asparagus), rent some movies, get a bottle of wine, and cozy up on the couch with my warm blanket and kleenex. :-/

shrugging

by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 11:41 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
GraLauJon
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 12:07 PM

i had to start new rituals in my life....different from what we did in marriage. 

miss_AP
by Bronze Member on Nov. 15, 2012 at 1:57 PM

Good luck....I'm getting sad about the same. My girls go with exh every Thanksgiving and every Christmas Day, I get every Christmas Eve. I know it will work out fine, this was my holiday schedule as I picked which holidays I wanted (spring break and Easter, he got Xmas break and Xmas day). Just sort of seems like they've been gone a lot. I will be with my whole big family.....but I think it will be sad since its the whole weekend. I'm planning to catch up with a friend that moved that will be in town...and one of the guys I'm seeing wants to hang out on a weekend day like Saturday.....so that'll be good. Yank your bootstraps and trudge on.... you can do it mama.

luvcloudydays
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 2:00 PM
We switch holidays every other year. It's just something I've gotten used to. I'll usually just spend it with DH, but if he's deployed, I'll go visit my parents or visit friends.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Stephd710
by Bronze Member on Nov. 16, 2012 at 12:37 PM

Luckily I havent had to be without them yet.  Mine are only two and my ex really hasnt asked to take them for any of the holidays yet.  I will offer him half the day or a few hours on those days and he takes that, but so far, ive at least had them on part of the day on every holiday. 

PKK
by Member on Nov. 16, 2012 at 3:25 PM

I was so worried about that, too - perfectly normal!  Don't set yourself up for despair.  Make your favorite meal, have the wine, watch the movies, soak in the tub, whatever, enjoy it!  The Thanksgiving I spent alone was filled with pink champagne in my jammies, crafts, more champagne, Lifetime movies, Internet shopping and more champagne.  The following week was filled with umpteen deliveries from online merchants and, thanks to the champagne, each and every box held an exciting surprise!!!!

CampClan
by Bronze Member on Nov. 17, 2012 at 8:52 AM

I will tell you after Christmas. Last year at Thanksgiving we were having issues. Since my family did Thanksgiving the night before he had them that day. I took my day & relaxed after putting Christmas decorations up. Then a month later we were tyring to work things out so we were together Christmas Day (he slept on the couch though).

This year he gets them the 1st half of break. I have never woken up on Christmas day without my kids. And unless his mom says they can sleep at her house (very unlikely) I probably won't this year. BUT I'm torn... do I force them to get up early & do gifts here with me before leaving?

OR.... I put ONE small gift for each of them under the tree to open & then a note from Santa saying "I know you have a busy day today with your Daddy & I didn't want to keep you from running late so after you leave Mommy will call me & I will make a special run back to your house for when you return at 1pm." Ooooooo..... I LOVE this idea!! I may just go with it! LOL Only the 3yr old believes anyways.

MommaNuney
by on Nov. 17, 2012 at 9:17 AM
I LOVE the second idea! I won't have them Christmas eve so they won't wake up at my place on Christmas and I have no idea when he plans on dropping them off :( I am use to getting up with them Christmas morning and trying to drag their dad out if bed to open presents. At least this year I don't have ti deal with him disappearing to watch TV while I sit with kids enjoying their presents!

Quoting CampClan:

I will tell you after Christmas. Last year at Thanksgiving we were having issues. Since my family did Thanksgiving the night before he had them that day. I took my day & relaxed after putting Christmas decorations up. Then a month later we were tyring to work things out so we were together Christmas Day (he slept on the couch though).

This year he gets them the 1st half of break. I have never woken up on Christmas day without my kids. And unless his mom says they can sleep at her house (very unlikely) I probably won't this year. BUT I'm torn... do I force them to get up early & do gifts here with me before leaving?

OR.... I put ONE small gift for each of them under the tree to open & then a note from Santa saying "I know you have a busy day today with your Daddy & I didn't want to keep you from running late so after you leave Mommy will call me & I will make a special run back to your house for when you return at 1pm." Ooooooo..... I LOVE this idea!! I may just go with it! LOL Only the 3yr old believes anyways.

Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
tottaxi
by Silver Member on Nov. 17, 2012 at 9:57 AM


Quoting MommaNuney:

I LOVE the second idea! I won't have them Christmas eve so they won't wake up at my place on Christmas and I have no idea when he plans on dropping them off :( I am use to getting up with them Christmas morning and trying to drag their dad out if bed to open presents. At least this year I don't have ti deal with him disappearing to watch TV while I sit with kids enjoying their presents!

Quoting CampClan:

I will tell you after Christmas. Last year at Thanksgiving we were having issues. Since my family did Thanksgiving the night before he had them that day. I took my day & relaxed after putting Christmas decorations up. Then a month later we were tyring to work things out so we were together Christmas Day (he slept on the couch though).

This year he gets them the 1st half of break. I have never woken up on Christmas day without my kids. And unless his mom says they can sleep at her house (very unlikely) I probably won't this year. BUT I'm torn... do I force them to get up early & do gifts here with me before leaving?

OR.... I put ONE small gift for each of them under the tree to open & then a note from Santa saying "I know you have a busy day today with your Daddy & I didn't want to keep you from running late so after you leave Mommy will call me & I will make a special run back to your house for when you return at 1pm." Ooooooo..... I LOVE this idea!! I may just go with it! LOL Only the 3yr old believes anyways.

Why don't you know when he will be dropping them off?  What does  your co say?

cara124
by Cara on Nov. 17, 2012 at 11:19 AM
1 mom liked this

My heart goes out to all of you ladies ! giving heartAfter reading this post I once again realized how lucky I am that I get the kids for ALL the holidays and the EX get the day after . YOU are all strong women who I just wanted to ((( HUG ))) . This holiday season !

CampClan
by Bronze Member on Nov. 17, 2012 at 12:28 PM
Steal it if you want! :)

Quoting MommaNuney:

I LOVE the second idea! I won't have them Christmas eve so they won't wake up at my place on Christmas and I have no idea when he plans on dropping them off :( I am use to getting up with them Christmas morning and trying to drag their dad out if bed to open presents. At least this year I don't have ti deal with him disappearing to watch TV while I sit with kids enjoying their presents!



Quoting CampClan:

I will tell you after Christmas. Last year at Thanksgiving we were having issues. Since my family did Thanksgiving the night before he had them that day. I took my day & relaxed after putting Christmas decorations up. Then a month later we were tyring to work things out so we were together Christmas Day (he slept on the couch though).

This year he gets them the 1st half of break. I have never woken up on Christmas day without my kids. And unless his mom says they can sleep at her house (very unlikely) I probably won't this year. BUT I'm torn... do I force them to get up early & do gifts here with me before leaving?

OR.... I put ONE small gift for each of them under the tree to open & then a note from Santa saying "I know you have a busy day today with your Daddy & I didn't want to keep you from running late so after you leave Mommy will call me & I will make a special run back to your house for when you return at 1pm." Ooooooo..... I LOVE this idea!! I may just go with it! LOL Only the 3yr old believes anyways.

Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)