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custody

Posted by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 1:38 PM
  • 5 Replies
I have been divorced since July 2013. I agreed to shared joint custody. I have had the kids 100% of the time since July. He visited them for about three days since then.

Would most courts give me full custody of the kids by now? I feel I do anything in my power to help my kids and my 5 yr old excels in school.

I did not use a lawyer with him to do this. I was threatened that I would lose my kids. He makes 10k/month and pays less than 25% of his monthly income for child support and alimony combined.

I want to move on in my life, but I feel I was completely taken advantage of and see this as a great injustice. I don't think I do anything wrong to put me at risk for losing my kids except that he makes a lot more money than me.

He complains of how bad his debts are and that I should feel lucky he didn't assign them to me. He has told me that our decree cannot be changed.

I do not like how he dictated everything. He got pregnant and married again three months after our divorce. He won't admit to cheating. He has cohabitated with her since we separated last March.

Do I have to beware of his threats? How would a court grant him full custody if he has only seen them three times since July? He signed a note after the divorce to grant his permission for them to live with me out of state. He rarely even speaks to them. If they do it is because I call him for the kids.

It seems to me that the kids are unwanted trash from his first marriage and he doesn't want to even pay 25% of his monthly income for them so he can focus on his new family. The kids have told me that 'daddy threw me in the garbage can'.

Any advice? I am sick of being passive. Why would anyone put up with this from the guy? How hard is it to get child support and custody changed? Can he really 'win' the kids?

This has been the worst year of my life and I feel exhausted but I also feel very compromised and taken advantage of. I am very sorry I gave way to his threats and didn't use an attorney.
by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 1:38 PM
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Replies (1-5):
tottaxi
by Battle Weary on Apr. 3, 2014 at 3:31 PM

He bullied you into a shitty custody order.  Not having an attorney played into his hands.  Of course you know that now.

Custody is usually able to be changed when there has been a major change of circumstance.  Shared custody means that the two of you are supposed to split the time 50/50 and that isn't happning.  I'd say that would constitute a pretty major change.

See an attorney.  If you have them 100% of the time you should have sole custody and nothing less.  Also ask for CS and alimony to be adjusted.

Many men threaten to take the children away and cite their income (most generally more than the wife's) as the reason they will win.  This is not true. 

chesswoman
by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 5:42 PM
Thank you for your reassurance. Divorce is very messy but I have to stand up for my rights and the rights of the children. If they are entitled to more support they should get it before the new wife sinks her claws in. It is pure evil to get pregnant so fast with a guy with two kids from the first marriage.
chesswoman
by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 5:44 PM
Most states have a waiting time from the time you get divorced and can get married again, but not Nevada. This whole year has just been a disaster and I felt totally powerless, manipulated, and disadvantaged. Like he just dictates the entire future. He wants to deny the kids their money so he can have his new family. He wants to move on very fast with no consideration for the children that exist. It is completely selfish and yes, he is only a bully.
chesswoman
by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 5:46 PM
It is the most wreckless thing I have ever experienced.
Monsita
by on Apr. 7, 2014 at 10:45 AM
Please keep on getting information on your State law on child custody changes.
Get your self familiar with the court system in your State. Get a lawyer and take it from there.
Best of luck!

Quoting chesswoman: I have been divorced since July 2013. I agreed to shared joint custody. I have had the kids 100% of the time since July. He visited them for about three days since then.

Would most courts give me full custody of the kids by now? I feel I do anything in my power to help my kids and my 5 yr old excels in school.

I did not use a lawyer with him to do this. I was threatened that I would lose my kids. He makes 10k/month and pays less than 25% of his monthly income for child support and alimony combined.

I want to move on in my life, but I feel I was completely taken advantage of and see this as a great injustice. I don't think I do anything wrong to put me at risk for losing my kids except that he makes a lot more money than me.

He complains of how bad his debts are and that I should feel lucky he didn't assign them to me. He has told me that our decree cannot be changed.

I do not like how he dictated everything. He got pregnant and married again three months after our divorce. He won't admit to cheating. He has cohabitated with her since we separated last March.

Do I have to beware of his threats? How would a court grant him full custody if he has only seen them three times since July? He signed a note after the divorce to grant his permission for them to live with me out of state. He rarely even speaks to them. If they do it is because I call him for the kids.

It seems to me that the kids are unwanted trash from his first marriage and he doesn't want to even pay 25% of his monthly income for them so he can focus on his new family. The kids have told me that 'daddy threw me in the garbage can'.

Any advice? I am sick of being passive. Why would anyone put up with this from the guy? How hard is it to get child support and custody changed? Can he really 'win' the kids?

This has been the worst year of my life and I feel exhausted but I also feel very compromised and taken advantage of. I am very sorry I gave way to his threats and didn't use an attorney.
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