I have a feeling I'll be at this board a lot now! He left over the weekend, after a huge fight (I admit, I told him to leave, that all he does is anger our explosive son and that we'd be better off without him). I meant it, but didn't mean it to come out in anger.
He came over Sunday to get some things for work, left without saying goodbye to the kids (just snuck out the side door). So now that's twice he's left them without a word.
Finally communicated today. I asked if he wanted to come over so we could talk, or should I just contact a lawyer. His response: If I called a lawyer, he would quit his job and be homeless, jobless, and we'd never hear from him again. It's not a threat, that's what he'd do.
As well as some personal attacks against me and what a horrible person he thinks I am, how he only gets joy from the boys, etc..
However, he also says he's going to move back into the house, live in the basement, and will stay until the boys graduate (twins), then we'll get divorced. They are in second grade.
I'm willing to give it a try, but the threat about the lawyer is really making me angry. I want to be protected in this and I feel that a formal agreement is in both our best interests. I also feel like if he's going to be so petty that he makes personal attacks that living in the same house will be just as bad as the last seven years have been (as angry as I got at him in the past, I never name called or made comments of that nature. In his eyes, I can see that my comments about him not trying to handle the explosive twin appropriately and that he antagonizes him might be the same. I want to be fair).
I don't think I'll want to date again, I have no interest in a relationship and since there's been no personal side to ours for well over two years I don't see myself wanting to be intimate with another person again so who would want to date me? I'm perfectly happy being on my own, I've been thinking about it for a couple of years now and I'm prepared.
Just wanted to know if any of you had a similar situation when you split up, how you handled it, and any advice that you have. Thanks!