Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

He's in denial.

Posted by on Jan. 6, 2015 at 12:52 PM
  • 3 Replies
So here I am in NJ in my child hood home. My kids and I have been sleeping in the living room. We can't stay here forever. I told my stbxh that he needs to let me know if he would be okay with us finding a place here in jersey or if he would prefer me to stay in va so it's easier for him to see the kids. I'm fine with staying in Va if he can be civil. I let him know he needs to let me know something ASAP so I can start looking. Then he tells me at work and he's getting dizzy and he thinks his blood pressure is going up. Then begs me to come back home and starts talking about hiw he can't wait to go snow tubing. He really needs to just face reality. I'm trying to avoid calling his command but if he can't snap into it I am going to have to. He is so used too me leaving and coming back a few days later and it's killing him that I am not coming back this time but I really have no sympathy this time. Maybe a smudge but not near enough to even think about working it out.
by on Jan. 6, 2015 at 12:52 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-3):
tottaxi
by Battle Weary on Jan. 6, 2015 at 1:29 PM
1 mom liked this

He's done this before and it worked, so of course he is going to do it again.

Why are you hesitating going to his command?  If he is having all of these symptoms (dizziness, etc) then you could use that as a good reason to notify them as to what is happening.

Don't cave in again.  Do what you've always done and you'll get what you've always got.  You know that will not work long term.

musicpisces
by Member on Jan. 6, 2015 at 1:46 PM
1 mom liked this
With the history, you're going to have to show him this time is different. He sounds a lot like my STBX. Stand firm, and make a move one way or another. Are the kids his? Do you have the right to leave the state?
Fayanne
by Bronze Member on Jan. 6, 2015 at 5:38 PM
1 mom liked this

 okay

he's not in denial. He's in "here we go again" mode.

And, as in classic psychological scenarios, he's quite likely to willingly  escalate his behavior to get his way again.

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)