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Nighttime

Posted by on Mar. 22, 2016 at 12:00 AM
  • 8 Replies
Night seems to be the hardest.I hate sleeping alone. I love to cuddle. Some nights I just toss and turn. How do I get over this?
by on Mar. 22, 2016 at 12:00 AM
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Replies (1-8):
Fayanne
by Bronze Member on Mar. 22, 2016 at 8:15 AM
1 mom liked this

You work through it, and learn to rely on yourself. Every ending is a new beginning, focus on the possibilities, not the used to be.  At the end of the day, write down three things you're looking forward in the next day, three things you want to accomplish, and three things you're thankful for. It's really all about retraining the mind and reshaping your attitude.  If it's really hard, head to counseling.


sonnyswoman75
by on Mar. 22, 2016 at 10:49 PM
Yes I know it's all about my thinking. I guess feeling sorry for myself is not the answer.
bjane01
by Bronze Member on Mar. 23, 2016 at 8:28 AM
1 mom liked this
For me I felt really lonely some times and I missed my jerk ex like crazy. It was really a struggle not to go back even though he hurt me very badly. He can be very charming and sweet when you leave him and he wants you back.

I kind of embraced my sadness some nights. Allowed myself to feel the lose and pain. Then I would set out the next day to really care for myself and take care of my needs. To build myself up and build an armour for my heart. After time it did get better. I rarely get lonely even though I sleep alone every night.

The one thing I Do Not miss about my ex is the bad nights with him. The good nights were awesome. But there were nights that were pure hell with him. He'd "punish" me sometimes. If I did or said something he didn't like, if I wasn't perfect, if I didn't want sex or something he wanted....he'd degrade me (call me horrid names) tell me he hated me, tell me he could not stand me, and if I cried to this treatment, he'd either literally laugh at me and mock my tears Or he'd tell me he needed to throw up at the sound of my tears. Then he would promptly leave and/or give me the silent treatment until I cracked. I'd be in so much pain that I'd crack quickly and I would apologize to him. That would be the end of it and my self esteem would be shot. He'd pretend like nothing happened and if I brought it up, the "punishment" would start all over again.

I don't miss that hell. I shutter to think of it. It almost destroyed me.

It's been really hard to date because I am so happy now I just don't trust this ever happening to me again. Maybe one day I will find the strength to trust again.
sonnyswoman75
by on Mar. 23, 2016 at 6:54 PM
Yes I miss my ex and sometimes wish we would work things out but then I remember that he never really took our marriage seriously.

Quoting bjane01: For me I felt really lonely some times and I missed my jerk ex like crazy. It was really a struggle not to go back even though he hurt me very badly. He can be very charming and sweet when you leave him and he wants you back.

I kind of embraced my sadness some nights. Allowed myself to feel the lose and pain. Then I would set out the next day to really care for myself and take care of my needs. To build myself up and build an armour for my heart. After time it did get better. I rarely get lonely even though I sleep alone every night.

The one thing I Do Not miss about my ex is the bad nights with him. The good nights were awesome. But there were nights that were pure hell with him. He'd "punish" me sometimes. If I did or said something he didn't like, if I wasn't perfect, if I didn't want sex or something he wanted....he'd degrade me (call me horrid names) tell me he hated me, tell me he could not stand me, and if I cried to this treatment, he'd either literally laugh at me and mock my tears Or he'd tell me he needed to throw up at the sound of my tears. Then he would promptly leave and/or give me the silent treatment until I cracked. I'd be in so much pain that I'd crack quickly and I would apologize to him. That would be the end of it and my self esteem would be shot. He'd pretend like nothing happened and if I brought it up, the "punishment" would start all over again.

I don't miss that hell. I shutter to think of it. It almost destroyed me.

It's been really hard to date because I am so happy now I just don't trust this ever happening to me again. Maybe one day I will find the strength to trust again.
WrongWayDiva
by Bronze Member on Mar. 24, 2016 at 11:24 AM
1 mom liked this

Go to the shelter and adopt a cat or dog.   They will always love you, cuddle you, never mock you, and always appreciate you.   There will be peace and love in your home and a lot less bitching and crying.  

tottaxi
by Battle Weary on Mar. 24, 2016 at 12:59 PM

I must be wired differently.  The first night that ex was out of the house I moved my pillow to the center of the bed and stretched out.  It felt fantastic!

I'm with WrongWayDiva...animals are great companions.  While I claimed the center of the bed, I was also soon surrounded by my pets.  I never felt alone.

Goobergal
by Bronze Member on Mar. 26, 2016 at 8:53 AM
1 mom liked this

Pillow pet or body pillows are great!!! De man the room and make it your oasis.  Make it smell pretty and not neutral.  LOL. Take over the closet

sonnyswoman75
by on Apr. 4, 2016 at 11:59 PM
I need a body pillow.I think that would help.

Quoting Goobergal:

Pillow pet or body pillows are great!!! De man the room and make it your oasis.  Make it smell pretty and not neutral.  LOL. Take over the closet

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