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All these lies keep pouring out

Posted by on Mar. 30, 2016 at 10:39 AM
  • 16 Replies
I'm so livid with xdh right now. So the week before St Patricks Day he called to ask if he can have the kids that Thursday through Saturday night I said yeah sure. I wanted to go out anyway so when he picked them up I asked oh so what are you guys gonna do with them (him and his new gf) he was like oh nothing probably just chill and watch some movies. I was like oh fun. Well after he brought them home and few days went by o called him up and asked if I could bring them over that night I had to work he said that's fine but I will still be at work (his gf would be watching them) so I'm dropping them and start giving her the run down of my DD she's sick with the flu and I'm going to get her in her pjs and she goes on to tell me oh no I'm probably just gonna put her in her night gown we bought her on our trip to ala..... I stopped her and said Alabama? You took them to Alabama? She said yes

I said oh when did that happen? She's like oh on St Patricks Day weekend. So I turned around and saidok have a good night. At that point I was LIVID not only did they both lie and took them outta state without me knowing but this will make it her second time lying to me to my face. I told him you ever do that again and they won't be staying over night anymore. And if she's gonna keep lying then they won't be staying with him at all. I'm sick to my stomach with how he's acting. He's all I'm a grown ass man I can do what I want. I said well you can't take them outta state with out me knowing so grow up.
by on Mar. 30, 2016 at 10:39 AM
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Replies (1-10):
RedRose91
by Member on Mar. 30, 2016 at 10:39 AM
Bump for thoughts
tottaxi
by Battle Weary on Mar. 30, 2016 at 11:09 AM

What does the court order say about taking the kids out of state?

WrongWayDiva
by Bronze Member on Mar. 30, 2016 at 11:14 AM

Lying is aggravating and upsetting but what does the custody agreement say in regards to visits?  Typically, taking the kids out of state is not a big deal and he doesn't have to notify you.  Be careful about witholding visits--it can bite you in the ass.

RedRose91
by Member on Mar. 30, 2016 at 11:26 AM
We are technically still married but separated. So there isn't any court agreements I still could've gotten him for kidnapping.

Quoting tottaxi:

What does the court order say about taking the kids out of state?

RedRose91
by Member on Mar. 30, 2016 at 11:27 AM
I could've gotten him for kidnapping.

Quoting WrongWayDiva:

Lying is aggravating and upsetting but what does the custody agreement say in regards to visits?  Typically, taking the kids out of state is not a big deal and he doesn't have to notify you.  Be careful about witholding visits--it can bite you in the ass.

WrongWayDiva
by Bronze Member on Mar. 30, 2016 at 11:39 AM
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Oh boy.....you are in a pickle.   Not even divorced and he is dating?  That sucks!   But, from a legal point of view, he is their father and the way it sits right now he has equal rights to the kids.   Taking your own kids across state lines is NOT kidnapping--he is their parent and he is allowed to parent as he sees fit.   

My best advice is to file for divorce and get custody orders in place--they protect everyone.   Hang around here for advice on parenting plans, custody orders, etc. but quit breaking his balls over every little thing--especially when you are wrong.   It WILL bite you in the ass....

Quoting RedRose91: I could've gotten him for kidnapping.
Quoting WrongWayDiva:

Lying is aggravating and upsetting but what does the custody agreement say in regards to visits?  Typically, taking the kids out of state is not a big deal and he doesn't have to notify you.  Be careful about witholding visits--it can bite you in the ass.


tottaxi
by Battle Weary on Mar. 30, 2016 at 11:58 AM

I agree with WrongWayDiva.

You need to file and get a court order in place so that things like this...his taking them out of state without your knowledge or consent...can't happen without repercussions.

At this point in time he could actually refused to return them to you.  Period.  He has as much right to them as you do and can withhold them as he sees fit.  Of course you could do the same, but it will, as WWD pointed out, come back to bite you in the ass.

Filing is simple.  You can do it yourself or you can retain an attorney.  With children involved it would probably be best if you hire a lawyer, but if you can't afford one at this time you can DIY.  Contact the Clerk of the Court for the proper forms.  You can file, get a temp custody order and have child support begun probably within  the next two weeks...at least that is how long it took us once ex was served.

Fayanne
by Bronze Member on Mar. 30, 2016 at 9:39 PM
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Good luck with that.

still married... no court order...


You need to file and start protecting your ass

Quoting RedRose91: We are technically still married but separated. So there isn't any court agreements I still could've gotten him for kidnapping.
Quoting tottaxi:

What does the court order say about taking the kids out of state?


                   
    Life is divine chaos
Embrace it.  Forgive  yourself.   Breathe
           And enjoy the ride....   

99problems
by New Member on Mar. 31, 2016 at 2:42 PM
If there is no court order he can do as he pleases. Him telling you is a courtesy. He does not have to tell you what they do on his time, just as you don't have to tell him what you do.

You cannot withhold the kids from him unless the kids are in immenant danger and you have to get an emergency court hearing. Him taking them out of state is not considered immenant danger. You would appear as a very controlling person if you used that as a reason.
Until you get a court order you can have a written agreement signed by both parties. The court will honor this.
hockeymom74
by Member on Mar. 31, 2016 at 3:22 PM
My lawyer had told me as long as pick up and drop off is on time he can go where ever he pleases! I stopped asking to nerve wracking !
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