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Stepmom Central Stepmom Central

Hi! How are ya?

Posted by on May. 26, 2011 at 12:22 AM
  • 2 Replies

My name is Chris.  I'm 29 years old.  DH and I have been married 2 years in August, and have been together 5 years now.  I have 3 SDs with 3 different BMs. We live in KS.

Long story, so feel free to stop reading now. lol

SD1 I have never met.  BM1 was a girlfriend of DH. They broke up shortly after SD1 was born.  BM1 moved to TX, got married, and started a custody case down there.  DH didn't have an atty, the judge said her atty had to inform DH of court dates. Atty got the day right, just the wrong month.  So DH's rights were severed.  This was in May of '06.  We recently, as in this month, had to get a new atty as ours retired.  New atty told us we might be able to get that overturned.  We thought it was final, so are still in shock and trying to decided what to do.  Our financial situation isn't that great, but he wants his daughter back.

SD2 was 2 when I met her. She is now 7 1/2.  Her mother was also a girlfriend, and the relationship fell apart shortly after SD2 was born.  Custody was a true 50/50 split until SD2 started school two years ago this fall. Now BM2 is the custodial parent.  We have a hard time getting information about SD2 from her.  Everything from doctor's visits to school records to general well being.  First semester SD2 had lice, the entire semester.  Her school doesn't seem to care if they have lice, she could still attend. UGH!  Second semester, she had a fever.  Got sent home from school on Tuesday.  We get her from school on Wednesday, BM2 says nothing.  SD2's fever spiked, and she got severly dehydrated.  If we'd known she had a problem, we wouldn't have let her play outside, but had her inside watching her and making her drink.  But it was all our fault. This mysterious fever lasted off and on for about a month, month and a half.  Never figured out what was wrong with her.  She was just fine over the summer with us.  Only health issues were scraped knees. lol She goes back to BM2's house, and gets bed bug bites.  Took the doctor and BM2 two months to figure out what it was, and then it was BM2's 19 year old sister who figured it out.  This semester, the poor kid has MRSA.  Boils on her belly, chest, and bottom. Another kid in her class has it as well.  She never had problems like this when they were 50/50.  

We will probably be going back to court soon for her.  Situation has changed at BM2's and we think our atty wasn't paying close enough attention to our case and let her get away with some things he shouldn't have.  During the school year, we get SD2 every wednesday and every other weekend.

The next BM almost deserves her own post.  I'll try to keep it short.  BM3 is the only one DH married. She was 23 or 24.  He was her 3rd husband.  She is now on her 5th.  Although she isn't legally married to him since her divorce to her 4th wasn't final.  She is with a different guy litterally every weekend between husbands, and sometimes during the marriages.  She has lived in 15 different residences in the past 5 years, none of which DH was properly notified of.  She has 4 children.  Her step-dad has full custody of her oldest daughter.  Next daughter was given up for adoption.  She severed her son's bio father's rights and had her current illegal husband adopt. And then is SD3.  

Afer DH and BM3's divorce, she had primary, but didn't take it.  We had both SD3 and her son until last year.  Her son went to our school for K and 1st grade.  SD3 went to Pre-k with us.  She signed guardianship of her son and primary custody of SD3 to us in fall of '09.  She went bezerk on us one year ago this July.  Claimes that we forged the noterized, hand written letter giving us custody and guardianship.  She threatened 3 times to flee with the children in one weekend.  We haven't seen her son for a year.  This is after we treated him like our own for 4 years.  He didn't even know DH wasn't his father. We have been in a long court process since then.  We have our hearing in June.

There is more on her, but I'll save it for later.  I'm sure you will be hearing rants. lol But that is me and the BMs I deal with.  And congrats if you lasted this long. lol


by on May. 26, 2011 at 12:22 AM
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Replies (1-2):
by on May. 27, 2011 at 9:17 AM

Wow, it's hard enough for me to handle dealing with one BM...can't imagine having to deal with three!

by on May. 27, 2011 at 1:51 PM

wow, what a complex situation! my SD is a result of a  short relationship too and her BM can be a horror sometimes. welcome to the group! 

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