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I just don't get it...

Posted by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 9:44 AM
  • 12 Replies

I just don't understand why people are so shocked that a BM doesn't have physical custody.  There are a lot of BM that are worthless and it is in the best interest of the child to be with the father and vise versa.  Also, am I like the only one that gets along with the BM to my step-son? We get along just fine and communicate all the time. Somepeople think I'm flipping nuts for not hating her.

by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 9:44 AM
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Replies (1-10):
mikiemom
by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 9:45 AM

Dh is the only person in real life that I know who had custody of his kids.

titousmum
by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 9:46 AM

I don't think you are the ONLY one- although surely you are in the minority. But consider yourself lucky. May the road always be so easy for you.

GlockMom
by Platinum Member on Aug. 19, 2011 at 10:21 AM

Why are people so shocked?  Because 99% of the time when a BM doesn't have her kids its because she lost them due to being a junkie, drunk or general POS.  People are shocked because mom is the one who usually gets the kids.  I don't know any moms who don't have their kids just because of normal reasons.  EVERY mom I know who lost custody is because she is unfit.

kia1987
by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 10:23 AM

There are a lot of BM that  make it completely impossible to get along with them.   It seems that no matter how hard you would try they would always find a fault.

ErinRenee815
by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 10:24 AM

SM and I get along pretty well. We have our disagreements but we are both adults and it's never really an issue. She's a good person. So no you're not the only one :) 

I agree with everything Glock said as well. The only mother that I know who doesn't have her children is my cousin. She had to attempt suicide several times in order to lose them. Otherwise she wouldn't have. 

Spades
by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 10:26 AM

Why would you hate her if you've never had problems?

makie2
by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 10:27 AM

My SS's BM has physical custody but, SS lives with us now. She is going to file with the court to give custody to my DH.  I think it is awesome that she sees that she can't provide a stable home for him and is willing to let my DH have physical custody. He never lived with her anyways, he was always with her parents.

makie2
by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 10:28 AM

I guess just because she is the ex, I am automatically suppose to hate her.

Quoting Spades:

Why would you hate her if you've never had problems?


Spades
by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 10:31 AM

Well, I would say not to entertain people who say that.  And as the other poster said, consider yourself lucky and I hope it stays that way for you.

Quoting makie2:

I guess just because she is the ex, I am automatically suppose to hate her.

Quoting Spades:

Why would you hate her if you've never had problems?

 


sweettxt1
by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 10:38 AM

We raised both of my SDs and you are so right there are BMs out there that are worthless. My oldest SD decided a long time ago see wanted nothing to do with her mother, once she was grown she tried to have a relationship with her only to end up finding out what she was truly like. We have no idea what or how much the woman stole from her and is also trying to get a ton of stuff off her credit that her mother got using her name.

I have tried forever to get along with everyone envolved in our family and it has had it's moment where things run very smooth but I am also glad that my children are all grown because now I just have to get along for a little while and then I am done. Mainly because the last words I had with both BM#2 and my boys SM were no exactly nice ones.

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