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How did you learn to be a step parent

Posted by on Oct. 3, 2011 at 5:23 PM
  • 11 Replies

Who taught you? Did you read a book? Which one?


I didn't think I would have any trouble with this being a step mom thing because I had a step son with my first marriage. But I adopted that child so... really, I was his only mom from the time he was 4.


The most difficult thing right now is dealing with my "bonus" son's mom. She complains to my husband about me A LOT! But it always seems like John and I are getting along well. I always heard that as a step.... you need to let the BP do the discipline and don't be thinking you are the same as the mom. So I pretty much am easy going with John. How to deal with the BM?

by on Oct. 3, 2011 at 5:23 PM
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Replies (1-10):
packermomof2
by on Oct. 3, 2011 at 5:50 PM

You don't, dad does. 

QueenBof6
by Silver Member on Oct. 3, 2011 at 6:06 PM
I learned to be a step mom through trial and error.

As far as BM. She's not my problem. Let him deal with her.
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ShannaBee
by on Oct. 3, 2011 at 6:29 PM

I didn't learn. To me, being a mom or a stepmom, is a trial by error thing.

jessiesluv
by on Oct. 3, 2011 at 6:38 PM

 You took my answer! lol

Quoting QueenBof6:

I learned to be a step mom through trial and error.

As far as BM. She's not my problem. Let him deal with her.

 

jenessamarie
by The follower :) on Oct. 3, 2011 at 6:49 PM

You don't deal with BM at all... And your DH can just ignore her if her concerns aren't legit... That way your home has peace. Who cares what she thinks? unless she has a point... If she doesn't, no need to bother yourself with what she says.

If things are going well with SS, all is good.

whatIknownow
by Emerald Member on Oct. 3, 2011 at 6:52 PM

How to deal with BM? well you could learn that by trial and error like I did - deal with her yourself and watch the shit hit the fan and blast shit everywhere.

or you can learn about it by listening to women who have had to clean shit off of everything after making that mistake.

My advice: don't deal with her. Ignore ignore ignore. Let your DH deal with her.

(I learned that using the shit-hits-fan method. You can choose the less messy option for yourself).

Sunseg
by on Oct. 3, 2011 at 7:36 PM
Trial and error and some dr Phil lol! Really you should let your dh deal w bm. Try to not let things get to you and rememer to always think about the kids and no matter how good, bad, or ugly the bm is ...she still is the kids mom.
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bremery
by Silver Member on Oct. 3, 2011 at 7:54 PM
Lulz! If I wasnt mobile, I'd like this post.


Quoting whatIknownow:

How to deal with BM? well you could learn that by trial and error like I did - deal with her yourself and watch the shit hit the fan and blast shit everywhere.


or you can learn about it by listening to women who have had to clean shit off of everything after making that mistake.


My advice: don't deal with her. Ignore ignore ignore. Let your DH deal with her.


(I learned that using the shit-hits-fan method. You can choose the less messy option for yourself).


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diditagain
by on Oct. 3, 2011 at 8:43 PM
1 mom liked this

You are soooooo right. If I am getting along with hubby and SS then all is well. Thanks for giving me some perspective. :)

diditagain
by on Oct. 3, 2011 at 8:50 PM

Also.... you guys are right about just letting my hubby deal with the BM. It needs to be his problem. Seriousy, I do not have an ex-wife.

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