Ever since I have been with my boyfriend, his ex has done nothing but try to poison the kids to think I was the cause for their parents seperation. We began dating waaaaay after their seperation and the time I met my boyfriend she was already engaged and pregnant with another man. Its been over a year and a half and it seems that things are only getting worse. She is now pregnant again and engaged to another man.
We get the kids every other week for the entire week from Sunday to Sunday. Quite honestly I don't think this is the best schedule for the kids. The kids reset themselves every week for each home. We are much more strict and stern and their mother is laid back. We have tried motivating the kids with a star chart, rewards, trips and allowance but in the end it all has failed.
I am mostly concerned with stepson because he is slacking off in school and lies continuously everday about any & everything. His mother doesn't make anything of it and thinks he is perfectly fine. However we get emails from his teacher almost daily if not everyother day that he has been kicked out of class, not paying attention, not doing his work & homework or got into a fight. Even his karate instructor is concerned for his attitude and well being. He has noticed the difference in our parenting from his mothers. As much as I know I am NOT his mother...I love him as if he were my own and I am willing to do any & everything for him. We are working on getting him to see a therapist, but his mother has told him and us that he doesn't need that....so of course now he feels he doesn't need that at all. We have tried getting him into karate...which he LOVES...but his mother was completely against it from the start. She refused to take him during her weeks and now has put into his head that he will play football instead. We have given her the opportunity to do as she has told him and enroll him into football team...but now she tells him she can't afford it with a new baby on the way. My boyfriend enrolled his daughter to preschool and she refused to help financially because she feels she does NOT need to go to school, yet she has been taking her on her weeks.
My step son told me the other night that his mom always interrogates him after we drop them off and that she tells him bad stuff about his father and I. He was teary eyed when he was telling me this. It completely breaks my heart because I can tell he feels so confused and lost.
What can I do to HELP him!?!?