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Looking for some advice

Posted by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 4:36 PM
  • 38 Replies

Last night BM text my husband at midnight.  She was texting him with dtf.  I had to google it to find out what that meant cause neither of us knew.  Apparently that means down to fuck?  She claimed she was drunk and horny.  Now do I allow this behavior to roll off my shoulder or actually say something?  





by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 4:36 PM
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Replies (1-10):
sandeeyo
by Le Bonjour Chat on Jan. 15, 2012 at 4:45 PM

Say something to her or to him?  I'm assuming her since DH probably told you?  I'd let it go.  She was probably being drunk and stupid and more than likely embarassed that she did that.  If it happens again, however, your DH should just tell her to go tell someone who cares and he isn't interested in DTF with her, reason why they AREN'T together anymore.

E_is_4_Ethan
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 4:49 PM

How do you know she was just drunk and horny? If she said that herself ...I would be little ticked at that comment as well.

pdxmum
by Ruby Member on Jan. 15, 2012 at 4:53 PM
Yuck. That probably feels really shitty. Who even wants to think about that.

Sorry, drunk and horny is not a reason to text your exhusband. Who is in bed with his wife.

I could give a shit if she was embarrased. She crossed way over a boundary. Did DH say anything?

What is the coparenting situation with them? What is yourv relationship with her? I might counsel "roll off your back" if there will be collateral damage.

I would have to say something to her.
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Andie646
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 4:56 PM

If she was "drunk and horny" then I doubt your DH was the only one that got that message ... usually when a girl is sending out that message it's a mass message to multiple guys waiting for the first one that responds.

Still, it shouldn't have gone to your DH ... but what can you do? I mean, really, we aren't in high school anymore and we don't need to "protect" our territory :p

baparrot2
by Platinum Member on Jan. 15, 2012 at 5:00 PM
1 mom liked this

This kind of behavior really only stops if HE is the one to make it stop. He must tell her very firmly to not text things like that anymore. It is not wanted nor appreciated by me or by my wife. 

LoriDeen
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 5:01 PM

Let is roll off. Plenty of people have drunk dialed an ex.  If you turn it into an issue, she'll just get defensive and pissy.

baparrot2
by Platinum Member on Jan. 15, 2012 at 5:04 PM


Quoting LoriDeen:

Let is roll off. Plenty of people have drunk dialed an ex.  If you turn it into an issue, she'll just get defensive and pissy.

I'm not one to engage in drama. BUT.....in this case, what might his silence say to her? I just dont think maxwell should be the one to say something.

lilangilyn
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 5:05 PM
2 moms liked this

I would let it go once. But only once. Then she should be informed to stop. Honestly, what kind of decent person does that?

sandeeyo
by Le Bonjour Chat on Jan. 15, 2012 at 5:10 PM

Fiance' and I would probably get a good laugh out of it if his ex did something like that. But then again, we're in our 40's so the thought of a 40-something year old ex professional ballerina who's now three times her fighting weight texting for some DTF is more than a little desperate and ridiculous in our books and not worth even bringing up...yes, even if she does it more than once.  Maybe if I were younger it might bother me, but at my age it would just be a friggin' comedy routine and I'm all about laughing about someone ELSE being a dumbass! LOL

nmaxwell816
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 5:15 PM

I was sitting next to him when she text him.  Last time we had the kids for the weekend which was two weeks ago- He got a random private call at 230 in the morning.  That time it was someone who acted as if they were his girlfriend but then again- I was awake with him and he was like oh yeah- When's the last time we hung out
?  And the girl hung up. 




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