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[Cafe AmyS]

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[tdugger37]

I am need of some help.  I am not understanding what is that my husband is looking for when my step kids come over, and he wants me to be a friend them.  How do you be a friend to a child?  He  wants me to do things with them like I do with my sister's kids, but because I don't have a relationship with them like I have with my sister's kid's hard.  I cook and I do ask them question, and I speak what more could I do?   How do I make myself available to them? 

[Cafe AmyS]

Welcome Corinne!

Quoting babygirlsmom314:

Hi, I am Corinne.  I am married to a wonderful man who has a son with his ex.  We have one beautiful daughter together and three dogs.  We get his son during the summer for four weeks.  His son is 7 and our daughter is 5.  Them being close in age is a blessing and curse, meaning they get along great but also fight like no other.

[Cafe AmyS]

  I think having a relationship with your stepkids that is more "aunt-like" is a good idea, especially as you're getting to know them.  Just have fun with them, tease them, spend time with them, enjoy them.

Quoting tdugger37:

Hi,

My name is Tricia, and I am a step mom of two children.  However, I do not have any kids of my own. My husband and I have been married for a little over a year.

[confusednsad38]

I'm Trish, and my DH and I have been together almost 12years. I came into my SK lives at 3SD and 5SS. When they were younger there were very few problems just the expected adjustments to change. I have never physically disciplined them only verbally when necessary. They are basically good kids and have never pulled the "your not my mom" card...yet. As teenagers it's been more difficult. Their BM is not providing an atmosphere of consistency or discipline and SS has become sexually active with no regard to the consequences of those actions. He has also been on probation for a felony offense. I can't possibly begin to understand what being a single mother is like so I'm cutting BM some slack in that regard, however, my DS is only 8 and he worships his big brother. My DH has the motto of boys will be boys and when the subject is raised about discipline he just blows it off. When something is said it is done in a manner that implies he is only trying to get me off his back and the SK have adopted his mannerisms in that respect to the point I have started thinking I just won't say anything. The problem is that our 2 younger children see all of this and my DS is already following their lead.

[SweetPea6908]

Hi I am Melissa, I have 4 daughters and a step daughter...My kids range from 13-2..My oldest daughter wants to stay with her dad in Ohio so I only get visits..The step daughter is from my husbands ex girlfriend.. My youngest daughter is with my husband...so we have 5 in all..I'm not good with introductions..lol

[Cafe AmyS]

Welcome to the group, Trish!

Quoting confusednsad38:

I'm Trish, and my DH and I have been together almost 12years. I came into my SK lives at 3SD and 5SS. When they were younger there were very few problems just the expected adjustments to change. I have never physically disciplined them only verbally when necessary. They are basically good kids and have never pulled the "your not my mom" card...yet. As teenagers it's been more difficult. Their BM is not providing an atmosphere of consistency or discipline and SS has become sexually active with no regard to the consequences of those actions. He has also been on probation for a felony offense. I can't possibly begin to understand what being a single mother is like so I'm cutting BM some slack in that regard, however, my DS is only 8 and he worships his big brother. My DH has the motto of boys will be boys and when the subject is raised about discipline he just blows it off. When something is said it is done in a manner that implies he is only trying to get me off his back and the SK have adopted his mannerisms in that respect to the point I have started thinking I just won't say anything. The problem is that our 2 younger children see all of this and my DS is already following their lead.

[Cafe AmyS]

Welcome Melissa!

Quoting SweetPea6908:

Hi I am Melissa, I have 4 daughters and a step daughter...My kids range from 13-2..My oldest daughter wants to stay with her dad in Ohio so I only get visits..The step daughter is from my husbands ex girlfriend.. My youngest daughter is with my husband...so we have 5 in all..I'm not good with introductions..lol

[cantblendthefam]

My name is Sara. I have 2 biological kids and 2 step kids. My husband and I have been together 3 yrs and married 1. His 7 year old is severely autistic. Can't speak and isn't potty trained. I'm pretty much hands off with him because its hard for my 8 and 5 year old to understand why Lukas gets away with things that they get in trouble with. Lukas can be violent at times. Although he is 7 he weighs almost 100 lbs and about a foot taller than myself. I'm afraid with this divide we will get divorced soon. And it doesn't help that his ex wife tryst to dictate what happens at our house. Please help all advice welcomed.

[04Chelle74]

Hello, I'm Michelle, a single mother of 4 and step mom of 2. My oldest daughter will be 21 in a few months has a 1 1/2 year old daughter, my 2nd second oldest Daughter turned 18 in march an has a 2 year old son, my son is 16 still in school, my youngest daughter is 11(her father ran with her not sure where she is). My two step kids, daughter is 6 an son is nearly 4. I have been with the father of the two since the four year old was 6 months or so. He has custody, real mom is not involved at all.

[QueenJessD]

My  name is Jessica.  I have three wonderful children, two biological daughters and one step-son.  It has been a rocky 5 1/2 years going through all of the growing pains of a blended family.  We are currently in a wonderful place, and my step-son (age 8) is wanting to live with us.  There is so much more to tell, but the jist of it is my heart is hurting and heavily burdened by all that we are going through.  I'm hoping this will be a good outlet for support or at least feeling like I'm not so crazy.  :)