This is a long one, but this person is pissing me off and sticking her nose where it doesn't belong and coaxing BM to do shit she shouldn't. And this is the story about WHY she is doing it.
SO's former "best friend" suddenly became best friends with BM last summer after SO told her to f*** off when she bad-mouthed me.
Short version: The former friend (FF) lives in Utah, where he lived for a couple years, we live in Michigan. He has seen her (yes, HER) once since he moved back to Michigan. He got together with BM in 2002. When the friend came to visit, BM forbade him to see her. Friend flew several hundred miles and spent a LOT of money visiting him, only to be stuck in a hotel room the entire time she was visiting, because SO wasn't allowed to see her. She flew back to Utah, pissed off the SO let BM rule his life, etc etc, they didn't talk again until BM and SO split up years later (2006).
SO and I moved in together in December 2010. SO apparently failed to mention this to FF. They were facebook friends, we posted we moved in together, he figured she knew. So fast forward to June 2011. FF tells SO she's flying in on this date, blah blah, he has to pick her up. She flew into Detroit, which is 4.5 hours away, instead of flying into our airport. I don't know why. So SO says okay. And then explains, Hey I have to work Monday, you and my girlfriend will have to hang out, is that okay? SHE says: Um, your girlfriend will be there? He says: Um, yes she lives here, too.
FF flips out, claims it's going to be uncomfortable because we've never met, yada yada, which then makes ME uncomfortable. Whatever, it's my house, I'll still do my best to make her welcome. CLEAN THE SHIT out of the dump we live in, we buy a newer used couch so she's not sleeping on a crappy futon, and I spend a lot on food and bathroom stuff so she feels welcome.
Day of her arrival: her baggage is lost, the airport comps a hotel room. This is Friday. SO has taken a day off work to go get her. They go back and forth about him just going in the morning to get her. She begs him to go down to Detroit and just stay in the hotel with him and her other friend that lives there. He tells her he doesn't feel comfortable leaving me at home without a vehicle (he had stopped paying on his by this point) and he wouldn't be okay with me staying with some guy he'd never met so he wouldn't do it to me (valid point, I think). She replies with some catty remark about me controlling him. I got pissed. I've never been controlling. I never asked him NOT to go. But when she said this, I really DIDN'T want him to go. He went anyway, because she is manipulative and an asshole. I messaged her on facebook and just say something like, "Hey, I just want you to know I told SO I didn't care if he stayed down there. It's not a big deal to me. He said he feels uncomfortable though because we've never met and he wouldn't want me to stay overnight with a guy he didn't know. Either way, I want you to have fun up here. :)" I was super nice, despite wanting to tell her to book a flight back.
She made her entire week stay with us hell. She did NOT understand, even though SO told her SEVERAL TIMES, that we could NOT afford to go out to eat, to go places, etc, etc. She kept saying she'd pay for gas, she'd pay for this and that. I didn't care. I told SO to go. When we had a barbeque with a few friends, she told me the story about BM stopping SO from seeing her the first time she visited up here. I believed it of course, and I thought we were actually getting along.
SO made a big mistake of getting into my facebook account the night before she left and made assumptions. The night he'd gone to Detroit, I went out with my friend and we stayed at another friend's house. She hooked up with someone there, and she asked me to message him and ask him not to post anything about it on FB. I messaged the guy and told him my friend asked if he wouldn't post anything about Friday on FB (my friend was in the middle of a divorce).
SO read it the wrong way. He thought that I was the one that didn't want anything to be said about it. He flipped out. We fought. Blah blah blah. I was very upset he got into my facebook without asking, he wouldn't apologize. It was all over in an hour.
FF left the next morning. I stayed home, yet again. Couple days later, SO comes home from work pissed. FF had posted all over FB (Facebook really starts drama, huh??? lol) that drama ruined her vacation. FF and I were not friends yet on FB so I didn't see this, and had added her as a friend. She had not accepted it. I messaged her, apologizing for fighting on her last night there.
Seriously, it wasn't that bad. We even barbequed again, had some drinks, and watched Archer that night and we had a good time. I thought everything went well the whole time she was there.
She wrote back and told me that I was controlling, and that just because she was friends with my SO, it doesn't mean she had to be friends with me. I didn't know what to say. I let SO read what she wrote and he told her that if she couldn't accept the person he was in love with, their friendship would probably not last.
SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO (sorry this is so fricken long!), in the end, FF bashed me on Facebook, told all of their mutual friends that I was a bitch and cheated on SO, and then befriended BM on Facebook. She's never met BM IRL. The first time she met SS was when she stayed with us.
FF has been apparently posting bad shit about SO all over BM's facebook, but since she had blocked us we couldn't see it. Suddenly we're unblocked. I want to punch this bitch in the face- and I'm not a violent person. *Insert loud groan w/ scream*