I thought I'd try to post here again. Although I greatly appreciate all the replies and info I have received since joining not long ago, I was not prepared to be pounced on when discussing my step kids. I try to word things very carefully as to not offend anyone or to speak badly about my step kids, who I love dearly. But I thought this forum was to be able to vent and get ideas and suggentions to make us better step moms to these great kids! That being said...I'm going to give it another whirl:
HELP!! My ss is 15 1/2! My dh to be has custody of his two kids and I have my two, so we have them all the time with the exception of weekend visits. The kid's mother abandoned them to the care of their father while running off with another woman (not judging, just sharing info). My dh is a terrific father! Their mother is a mother when it's convenient. Unfortunately while sd is pretty good at cleaning up after herself, ss is NOT! He has been enabled a bit by my dh and his mother doesn't have time for such things as teaching her kids how to put dishes away, throwing away trash, etc.
Now unfortunately this is filtering into my life. I work at home and have clients coming in so it is necessary that our home be neat and clean. I will say that ss talks the talk and says that he wants to help and he wants to learn how to do things...when it comes right down to it, he's pretty lazy. I have said things to my dh (very gently) and sometimes it's well received and sometimes it is not. So I have just kept my thoughts to myself. Dh does see some of his messiness sometimes and will say something to him. We're talking this kid doesn't know how to hang clothes on hangers, how to put underwear and socks in drawers, how to throw his trash away, how to unload the dishwasher and seperate forks from spoons and how to stack plates so when you open the cabinet, everything doesn't fall out. I have shown him MANY times but it is not improving. I am at a loss and would appreciate some suggestions.
Thanks for your help...have a terrific day! :-)
~Julie In Ohio~
Mom of 4 Teens
"Two wrongs don't make a right!"