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Stepmom Central Stepmom Central

Are we jaded?

Posted by on Apr. 22, 2012 at 6:54 PM
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I think reading all these posts with so much drama and back and forth has jaded me.

One of my guy friends from Jr High and High School came from a divorced family, they were divorced long before I knew him. Dad was remarried and lived across the country.

I never really knew much about his stepmom or their relationship. He visited on holidays and summers and dad came to town and visited.

His mother died suddenly a couple years ago. In the obituary it listed her ex husband AND the stepmom as survivors.

Last week my friend posted a ton of photos on Facebook of the birth of his niece. Stepmom was in most of the pictures, holding the newborn at the hospital, posing with my friend and his brother.

If one didn't know you would assume she was the mother/grandmother. It was the perfect picture of family happiness.

All I could think of when looking at the photos and remembering the obituary was that this is abnormal. How messed up it that to see a happy step situation and the first thought is that this is not normal?Though I do think the obituary thing was strange no matter what.

I am quite positive if the mom was still alive they would have all been in the photos together, as well.

Do you ever feel that you are jaded from all the things you read here?

by on Apr. 22, 2012 at 6:54 PM
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Replies (1-10):
PROGENITOR
by on Apr. 22, 2012 at 6:56 PM

yes, sort of

CoochieLibre
by on Apr. 22, 2012 at 7:00 PM

Some of the things here make me a little worried about what I have to look forward to. BM is constantly causing drama and while I hope for the best, I think as things get more serious with SO, the drama will only intensify. But no, I am not jaded... I am hoping to still build an amicable relationship with her someday.

QueenCreole313
by on Apr. 22, 2012 at 7:23 PM
2 moms liked this
I think I've found had a positive experience because I've learned I'm not the only stepparent who has these feelings. I don't consider myself a wicked stepmom but I'm also not trying to prove I'm super stepmom. I'm somehere in the middle.

When I read the drama posts, it makes me happy my sitch isn't THAT bad!
WHEW, IT COULD BE WORSE, A LOT WORSE,
newwife1
by Silver Member on Apr. 22, 2012 at 7:26 PM

My first though when I saw those pictures was, "Why is the SM there at the hospital, she's not the mom or grandma".

It's so wrong that I thought that about an obviously very happy and well adjusted family.


marinenonstop
by on Apr. 22, 2012 at 7:30 PM

no, in fact I quite appreciate my situation much more by things I read.

QueenCreole313
by on Apr. 22, 2012 at 7:35 PM
1 mom liked this
Quoting newwife1:

My first though when I saw those pictures was, "Why is the SM there at the hospital, she's not the mom or grandma".

It's so wrong that I thought that about an obviously very happy and well adjusted family.





I think we all filter the world through our own experiences. I think you feel that way because you compare their situation with yours and think YOU wouldn't do that. That's ok.

Some people may have the happy little blended family. Some just know how to ignore each other well in public. And others avoid one another like the plague! Lol whatever works.
angelmommy2806
by on Apr. 22, 2012 at 7:44 PM
I agree with this. Except Sd does have some major issue's that complicate life.

Quoting QueenCreole313:

I think I've found had a positive experience because I've learned I'm not the only stepparent who has these feelings. I don't consider myself a wicked stepmom but I'm also not trying to prove I'm super stepmom. I'm somehere in the middle.



When I read the drama posts, it makes me happy my sitch isn't THAT bad!

WHEW, IT COULD BE WORSE, A LOT WORSE,
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Mommyof5247
by on Apr. 22, 2012 at 11:22 PM
1 mom liked this

Not jaded. I know that each situation is different. Some of the drama situations are worse than our situation with my skids BM & it helps me to feel less alone & less stressed about ours.

Also, my relationship with my son's stepmom has been good to great overall; of course we've had our moments but when it comes down to it, we both care about my son & that's what matters to me.

ThePinkRobot
by on Apr. 22, 2012 at 11:36 PM
I had SMS before I was a sm so if I'm jaded I blame them.
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leegirl_jm
by Ruby Member on Apr. 22, 2012 at 11:56 PM
1 mom liked this

I am not jaded, I think most families get along do just fine, the SM/BM battles are a rarity and they make these boards interesting.

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