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Bipolar is an illness....... not a personality flaw

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I have seen on here too many times that a parent is bipolar so they are worthless. Please stop this. It is a pepetuation of a stero type that mental illness is okay to use as a dehumanizing tool. People use to use race the same way. Not once have I seen on here that "oh parent a has diabetes so they are worthless. " Did you know that a majority of Americans suffer from some form of mental illness or personality disorder. That it affects every family in one way or other. That if one parent has it than there is a strong chance that the skid that you love like your own will either have it or have a child with it. That in the '50's people with cancer were talked about in the same way as people with mental illness are today. It is the last bastion of socially acceptable bigotry. If mental illness affects your family get educated, yes if BM is actually bipolar than SM needs to get educated. NAMI online is a good place to start. Thank you for reading this.
by on Apr. 27, 2012 at 2:17 PM
Replies (41-50):
ahicks1108
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 2:04 PM

agreed.

katcb1019
by Bronze Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 2:07 PM

 I agree. I have a sister and nephew who are bipolr and so is odds bf. I would never use it agaisnt him or say he was unfit because of it. He is really good though at letting me know if he is having a bad day.

Spyswife
by Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 3:51 PM
4 moms liked this

If one has a disease, treat it. 

Many of the people who complain about a person with a menatl illness do so because that illness is used as an excuse to abuse others and it is never treated. If a person has been diagnosed with bi-polar, they need to be in treatment and take their meds. They need to realize that their illness has other victims than just themselves and not simply say "I have an illness, so when I cut you, stop complaining that it is bleeding and hurts."

Diabetics take insulin and watch thier diet. People with cancer undergo radiation and make lifestyle changes. 

It isn't bigotry to expect someone who is legitimately ill to make changes and get treatment. To assume that all of these stepmoms are being mean to these poor suffering, ill biomoms is ignorant.

Statitstics would assume that there are just as many SM's with bi-polar and not once will you see anyone say "Well, the Sm is a raging witch to me and the kids, but she has an illness, so it's somehow my responsibility to keep her life as comfortable as can be. "

If one has a mental disease, get treatment and stop making everyone who crosses your path pay for it. It's like demanding someone else get the chemo to cure another's cancer. 

pepper504
by Gold Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 4:07 PM
1 mom liked this


Quoting Spyswife:

If one has a disease, treat it. 

Many of the people who complain about a person with a menatl illness do so because that illness is used as an excuse to abuse others and it is never treated. If a person has been diagnosed with bi-polar, they need to be in treatment and take their meds. They need to realize that their illness has other victims than just themselves and not simply say "I have an illness, so when I cut you, stop complaining that it is bleeding and hurts."

Diabetics take insulin and watch thier diet. People with cancer undergo radiation and make lifestyle changes. 

It isn't bigotry to expect someone who is legitimately ill to make changes and get treatment. To assume that all of these stepmoms are being mean to these poor suffering, ill biomoms is ignorant.

Statitstics would assume that there are just as many SM's with bi-polar and not once will you see anyone say "Well, the Sm is a raging witch to me and the kids, but she has an illness, so it's somehow my responsibility to keep her life as comfortable as can be. "

If one has a mental disease, get treatment and stop making everyone who crosses your path pay for it. It's like demanding someone else get the chemo to cure another's cancer. 

Word! 

LivnSimply
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 4:20 PM
It used to be called manic depressive instead of bipolar so technically I think she's accurate just missing the second word to the diagnosis. You can be manic (depressive) and curl up in a ball. You can also be high as a kite and bouncing off the walls.

Quoting liltigersmom:

Haha oh my...



Mania is not curling up in a ball, that would be ::::drum roll::: please, depression.


Quoting cc77:

I think there are a lot of medical conditions that result in someone not being able to care for a child.  I am sorry, but that is my opinion.  If you can't keep a child safe, cared for etc then you are unfit.



If you are going to be so manic that you curl up in bed and ignore your child that is neglect.



If you go off your meds and get so angry you are throwing things and hurting those around you that is abuse.



Medical diagnosis or not.... you are unfit in these situations.



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neverbeamom
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 4:32 PM

Except, medication does not help Alzheimers - at all.  There's a difference.  A parent with bipolar can choose to medicate, or even use counseling and coping skills to control their moods.

I've been off medication for several years.  And I've never been better- because I take care care of myself.  An Alzheimers patient does not have that option.  They will NEVER get better, and they have no choice.  

Quoting Ms.Gwen:

Not really. I'm simply pointing out that there is a very fine line between illnesses and capable parenting. Being aware of that reality is not discrimination. Acting or speaking out against an individual without just cause simply because they are a parent with an illness is wrong. Forming an opinion based on statistical fact or personal experience is a freedom we all enjoy.


Quoting neverbeamom:

Uhhhh....

Comparing apples to oranges.

Quoting Ms.Gwen:

How about MS or alzhiemers? Should you be allowed to care for a child if you literally can't lift a finger to help them or can't remember that they even exist?




5monkeysplus1
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 4:35 PM
The manic part is the extreme high, the depression part is the low. To say you are manic (or experiencing mania) and curling up in a ball is not accurate. The BM in ny situation is bipolar & the court says she is not to be unsupervised w/ SS. So for some, bipolar prevents them from functioning at a responsible level.


Quoting LivnSimply:

I used to be called manic depressive instead of bipolar so technically I think she's accurate just missing the second word to the diagnosis. You can be manic (depressive) and curl up in a ball. You can also be high as a kite and bouncing off the walls.


Quoting liltigersmom:

Haha oh my...



Mania is not curling up in a ball, that would be ::::drum roll::: please, depression.


Quoting cc77:

I think there are a lot of medical conditions that result in someone not being able to care for a child.  I am sorry, but that is my opinion.  If you can't keep a child safe, cared for etc then you are unfit.



If you are going to be so manic that you curl up in bed and ignore your child that is neglect.



If you go off your meds and get so angry you are throwing things and hurting those around you that is abuse.



Medical diagnosis or not.... you are unfit in these situations.





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Ms.Gwen
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 4:47 PM
1 mom liked this
So can schizophrenics and pedophiles but I wouldn't let them near any child in my care.


Quoting neverbeamom:

Except, medication does not help Alzheimers - at all.  There's a difference.  A parent with bipolar can choose to medicate, or even use counseling and coping skills to control their moods.

I've been off medication for several years.  And I've never been better- because I take care care of myself.  An Alzheimers patient does not have that option.  They will NEVER get better, and they have no choice.  

Quoting Ms.Gwen:

Not really. I'm simply pointing out that there is a very fine line between illnesses and capable parenting. Being aware of that reality is not discrimination. Acting or speaking out against an individual without just cause simply because they are a parent with an illness is wrong. Forming an opinion based on statistical fact or personal experience is a freedom we all enjoy.





Quoting neverbeamom:

Uhhhh....

Comparing apples to oranges.

Quoting Ms.Gwen:

How about MS or alzhiemers? Should you be allowed to care for a child if you literally can't lift a finger to help them or can't remember that they even exist?






Posted on CafeMom Mobile
LivnSimply
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 4:57 PM
I get some are referring to it as the episode of either being "manic" or "depressive".

I was saying the name of the diagnosis which was referred to as A Manic (back in the day) with the depression missing. The slang term. They changed the name some years ago.



Quoting 5monkeysplus1:

The manic part is the extreme high, the depression part is the low. To say you are manic (or experiencing mania) and curling up in a ball is not accurate. The BM in ny situation is bipolar & the court says she is not to be unsupervised w/ SS. So for some, bipolar prevents them from functioning at a responsible level.



Quoting LivnSimply:

I used to be called manic depressive instead of bipolar so technically I think she's accurate just missing the second word to the diagnosis. You can be manic (depressive) and curl up in a ball. You can also be high as a kite and bouncing off the walls.



Quoting liltigersmom:

Haha oh my...



Mania is not curling up in a ball, that would be ::::drum roll::: please, depression.


Quoting cc77:

I think there are a lot of medical conditions that result in someone not being able to care for a child.  I am sorry, but that is my opinion.  If you can't keep a child safe, cared for etc then you are unfit.



If you are going to be so manic that you curl up in bed and ignore your child that is neglect.



If you go off your meds and get so angry you are throwing things and hurting those around you that is abuse.



Medical diagnosis or not.... you are unfit in these situations.









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liltigersmom
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 5:43 PM
Call it what you want.
op obviousily doesn't know what mania is.
With either dx mainia is the highs and depression is the lows.


Quoting LivnSimply:

It used to be called manic depressive instead of bipolar so technically I think she's accurate just missing the second word to the diagnosis. You can be manic (depressive) and curl up in a ball. You can also be high as a kite and bouncing off the walls.

Quoting liltigersmom:

Haha oh my...



Mania is not curling up in a ball, that would be ::::drum roll::: please, depression.


Quoting cc77:

I think there are a lot of medical conditions that result in someone not being able to care for a child.  I am sorry, but that is my opinion.  If you can't keep a child safe, cared for etc then you are unfit.



If you are going to be so manic that you curl up in bed and ignore your child that is neglect.



If you go off your meds and get so angry you are throwing things and hurting those around you that is abuse.



Medical diagnosis or not.... you are unfit in these situations.



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