Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Stepmom Central Stepmom Central

Rights come with responsibilities

Posted by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 2:40 PM
  • 51 Replies
****this is not to debate whether or not SPs should have rights! *****


Damn, I want to keep debating.  With legal rights, de facto or given, there are also responsibilities.  And I have posed this question with no response.  What about being financialy responsible?  What about paying support if your divorce DH?  What about your earnings being included in CS determination?  What rights do you want and which would you rather leave behind?

-PDXmum

I think she's got a great question here! Soooo.....

If A law was going in effect today giving SPs legal rights to the skids what responsibilities should come with it? What are you willing to be responsible for?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 2:40 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Ms.Gwen
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 2:45 PM
I think the responsibilities should be contingent on the exercising of the rights. By that I mean, if a SP goes to court and receives visitation or any part in legal custody they should have to pay CS/ be entered into the calculation.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
FloridaMomma
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 2:47 PM
I don't think SP's should get any rights.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Ms.Gwen
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 2:48 PM
2 moms liked this
I think this should apply to GPs going for rights/ visitation as well.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Ms.Gwen
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 2:52 PM
That is not the question being debated in this post. But thanks for playing. I'm simply asking... What if they did have rights? Not if they should.


Quoting FloridaMomma:

I don't think SP's should get any rights.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
mahalalove27
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 2:54 PM

I didn't think of adding that to the equation. Good point.

Quoting Ms.Gwen:

I think this should apply to GPs going for rights/ visitation as well.


cc77
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 2:57 PM

When my EX and his wife got divorced my son spent every other EOW with each because she was a big part of his life.  I did what was best for my son.  I did not expect her to pay me to help raise him however she did pay for what they did together and still does.  She also gives him money if he ask at events etc.  I think things should always be done with the childs interests at heart.

I would not care if I was considered in CS etc and long as my kids were considered as well.

I get SD what she needs when she needs it and I don't care what BM gives her because I take care of her when she is with me.

We pay CS, but I am almost certain we have spent the same or more on SD over the years because we feel that she should feel like we are home and she is not a visitor.

To each their own.  I don't need rights.  I just do what is best for all my children.

leegirl_jm
by Ruby Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 3:00 PM

Nothing, I have no interest in rights or responsibilities to other people's children.

FloridaMomma
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 3:05 PM
Snicker. "Thanks for playing" is what I say to my kids when they're annoying me.

Anyhow, I don't want any rights to my SO's kids. Not because they're bad kids, but because they have 2 perfectly good parents.

SO's kids are coming to stay with us for 6 weeks this summer. And, I don't really need any rights. Although it would be nice if I could take them to the YMCA. I tried to take his DD once & they wouldn't let me. It was annoying.

Quoting Ms.Gwen:

That is not the question being debated in this post. But thanks for playing. I'm simply asking... What if they did have rights? Not if they should.



Quoting FloridaMomma:

I don't think SP's should get any rights.




Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Kholt
by Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 3:06 PM
SP should have whatever right the Bio parent they r with chooses. If SM is with Bio dad and he says I don't want u involved in whatever or I would like u to handle whatever. (Specific to each relationship) then that Bio parent should be able to make that decision. Maybe if its a big deal to other Bio parent then a mediator should help settle. But if Bio mom says step dad can handle Dr appts when nec but not discipline that's her choice she knows step dad better than Bio dad does. And if he has problem go to mediator. And btw. I don't think GP should have rights period unless a court has declared parents incompetent and granted custody to grands. Too many grands think its their second chance instead of their child's first chance
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Ms.Gwen
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 3:17 PM
As for defacto/ given rights... Believe me' when I say I am fulfilling those responsibilities! With copious amounts of time, money, and, talent, lol! For the first year of my marriage BM paid no CS, DH had just lost his job, and so the entire financial burden of my 3 skids was mine to bare.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)