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BD is confused.

Posted by on May. 2, 2012 at 11:35 PM
  • 5 Replies
1 mom liked this

So my husband and have been talking about his son.  We believe his son has been doing things that he is accused of doing and pulling the wool over the BM eyes.  He is lying and trying to avoid his dad.  All of the sudden other stuff is more important then him.  When he tryies to get an explaintaion form the BM she just gives him an attitude.  He tries to help enforce stuff when the BM ask for help but she dont do her part.    We only see him every other weekend my question is what can we do?  How can  we help with this teenager who has to much freedom because his mom dont want to piss him off??  any suggestions??

by on May. 2, 2012 at 11:35 PM
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BE_U_T_XPRT
by on May. 3, 2012 at 1:29 AM
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 We have problems like that with Bm & ss.  There isn't much we can do and it pisses me off.  DH just lets it go and tries to do his best to influence his son to do the right things when he has him.  If the bm doesn't want help and doesn't want to co-parent you cannot make her.  You don't have much control over a teen either.  Since I don't know what kind of things he is doing I don't know what to say.  In our situation, it's like you just have to sit back and wait for something bad enough to happen to get him help.   

Steamedpuddle30
by Hi, my name is... on May. 3, 2012 at 2:21 AM
1 mom liked this
I agree with previous reply^^... I'm
On the purposes looming in and my
Dh gets his sons EOW and after school. BM gives in to everything then wonders when she has problems w her sons. Then tells at my Dh to help her. Dh does what he can on his time,to show ss's 12&16 how to be a respectful,good person but when BM doesn't follow through which is always,my Dh can only do so much.

I think,again I'm on the outside looking in,I feel that that parent feels loke he has no control over the kid when in fact he does. On his time. Eowknd mist be a bit hard. So I believe what my Dh says,you really can't do anything until they fuck up enough. :( my skid16 is on tardy number 21 now:( (bm's watch) so I kind of want SS to get in trouble. Better now then when he has a job and gets fired for being tardy.

Idk,this ones a hard thing. I'm single BM but when I see my Skids,I see easy solutions for my Dh and BM to go by. (not that I tell BM that) but I think of she held on to her Consistancy then it would be easier for the kid to transition into being responable for his own actions.

If my dh's ex wants to fuck up the kids,my Dh sees no way to stop it on her watch,just his. Sorry mama:(
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Steamedpuddle30
by Hi, my name is... on May. 3, 2012 at 2:23 AM
BM hates making her sons mad. So she let's them run wild. But then they are w my Dh they usually behave like normal kids. but she's really just hurting him in the long run. COD's suck! :/

I want to slap her silly sometimes or shake some sense into her. Lol.
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zannahdeux
by Silver Member on May. 3, 2012 at 12:37 PM

Nothing you can do except demand that ss treats you and dh with respect and follows your rules when he is at our house. All you can do is take solace that BM will reap what she sows.

nmaxwell816
by on May. 3, 2012 at 9:23 PM

I haven't hit the teenager years yet.  Good luck

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