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Why do you let your skids run your house?!

Posted by on May. 6, 2012 at 12:43 PM
  • 13 Replies

 

Poll

Question: Would you force your kids to leave when your Skids come to visit?

Options:

Yes-because there's too much tension.

Yes-I can't deal with all that drama!

HELL NO! My kids live here so they stay here!

No-I force them all to cohabitate to torture them.


Only group members can vote in this poll.

Total Votes: 20

View Results

You all know me-I'm the one with problems with DH's SD11.

She's not his bio daughter-however he is the only man who's been in her life since she was 1-2yrs old.

She was forced to come visit every weekend because BM doesn't want to deal with her (she's got a long history of this) SD11 would act out horribly at our home until finally I had enough and put my foot down with DH and told him to take her home.

DH agreed nothing was being fixed by BM forcing her to come here every weekend. All SD11 wants is a bit of extra time with her mother.

HOWEVER-that's not possible. BM parents 5 kids. They are SD13 (i thought she was older and I was wrong) DH's SD11, her SS9 my SS5 and her YDD3.

The boys are both in little league-so for a few hours Mon-Fri BM is at the Little League field with the boys. SD13 is left in charge of the 2 younger girls. SF works in another state.

DH told BM to keep her home. If SD11 wants to come visit-she's allowed but STOP forcing her.

This past Friday SD11 called DH-said she was staying home this weekend-SD13 was having friend over (they share a few friends) for a sleepover and SD11 wanted to be involved. SURE NO PROBLEM DH said.

Saturday he goes up to BM's to pick up SS5-SD13 SS9 and BM are having a fit. They want DH to take SD11 with him for the weekend. DH asked SD11 "DO you want to come?" She said no. So he told BM no.

She said "Well my skids don't want her here and quite frankly neither do I so I'll send her to "DOuche Bag's" house." (the dickhead that broke up BM's and DH's marriage) DH took her outside where SF and made it CRYSTAL clear to her-that SD11 was to stay home if that was her wish.

If you were a sm-and your skids wanted your kids gone while they were visiting-would you make them leave or stay?!

SF wasn't happy with the situation-and told both his kids they were grounded and canceled SD13's sleepover.

Since when do the skids get to say who can and can't be home?! That's almost as bad when SD11 told me she shouldn't have to share a room with DD8-DD8 lives here full time-SD11 only sleeps over a few nights out of the month!!!



by on May. 6, 2012 at 12:43 PM
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Replies (1-10):
darrensmom11
by on May. 6, 2012 at 12:53 PM
. . Sounds like a confusing situation. Good luck. :)
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rwblake2011
by on May. 6, 2012 at 1:02 PM
Wow! Nope all our kids are TOGETHER, its a family thing.
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SassyMom25
by Silver Member on May. 6, 2012 at 2:50 PM

Poor SD, being told by BM that she doesn't want her there. I wouldn't force my kids to go somewhere they don't want to but I want my kids with me at least 95% of the time (I mean seriously, we all need at least 5% to ourselves). We are lucky that we don't have this situation because we are CP.

Is the SF CP of his kids? If not, I could understand BM wanting them to be the fun parents and trying to get the skids to want to live with them (maybe because of CS)...just a thought.

BM deals with a similar situation because she is SM to 4 kids (ages 15-21) and they are half/bios to her 3 youngest (ages 5-7), so SS10 sticks out because he is the only one they don't have custody of (which is a whole other mess) and that isn't related to her DH. She often sends him to stay with other people when she has him (not sure why, maybe because she knows she can't do a lot of the things she does around the other kids with him there).

angelmommy2806
by on May. 6, 2012 at 2:58 PM
We're custodial so either way it wouldn't work. Now if they were here just on weekends I think there would be some so they could get some one on one time. If they Wanted me to leave I probably wouldn't cause it's my house to.
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rose0919
by on May. 6, 2012 at 3:03 PM
1 mom liked this

that poor child!!!! bm needs to step up and parent.  it seems like your dh needs to put his foot down and walk away from this child. i hate to say it but it has to be done. he isnt her father he really has no rights to her. bm cant force her on him. i know he feels for  the child but  its time to cut ties.  report bm for emotional neglect.  someone needs to stand up for this child other than your dh.

E_is_4_Ethan
by Platinum Member on May. 6, 2012 at 3:33 PM
Wow, have i been gone long? So,many new people.
luckystars2012
by Gold Member on May. 6, 2012 at 4:26 PM
My god. No way in hell. I would never send my dd away when SS was here. They may not be blood related but they are sibling and they will have to learn to work it out.
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CoochieLibre
by on May. 6, 2012 at 4:29 PM
1 mom liked this
If either set of children felt this way, I would sit down with them and discuss why they fell that way and then explain to them that everyone is part of the family and we're not kicking anyone out of the house. Kids feelings should be considered and listened to, but they do not run the show. I cannot believe this woman would turn her back on one child. :(
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Tigress22304
by Platinum Member on May. 6, 2012 at 5:09 PM


Quoting SassyMom25:

Poor SD, being told by BM that she doesn't want her there. I wouldn't force my kids to go somewhere they don't want to but I want my kids with me at least 95% of the time (I mean seriously, we all need at least 5% to ourselves). We are lucky that we don't have this situation because we are CP.

Is the SF CP of his kids? If not, I could understand BM wanting them to be the fun parents and trying to get the skids to want to live with them (maybe because of CS)...just a thought.

BM deals with a similar situation because she is SM to 4 kids (ages 15-21) and they are half/bios to her 3 youngest (ages 5-7), so SS10 sticks out because he is the only one they don't have custody of (which is a whole other mess) and that isn't related to her DH. She often sends him to stay with other people when she has him (not sure why, maybe because she knows she can't do a lot of the things she does around the other kids with him there).

SF and BM have full custody of his daughter SD 13-as of right now NOBODY has permanent  custody of Ss9. SF and BM have temporary emergency custody of ss9-they are working things out in court.

And it is not just SD11 that gets pushed out-she's removed SS5 and her YDD as well for an ENTIRE WEEK-she had all 3 kids stay with her ex Douche Bag because BM was babysitting her niece and nephew while her sister was on a cruise. yes this was just a few weeks ago.

BM will push her kids off onto anyone including BOTH her exes/siblings/ex's parents etc. pisses us off.

Tigress22304
by Platinum Member on May. 6, 2012 at 5:13 PM


Quoting angelmommy2806:

We're custodial so either way it wouldn't work. Now if they were here just on weekends I think there would be some so they could get some one on one time. If they Wanted me to leave I probably wouldn't cause it's my house to.

SD11 (Dh's sd) actually told me I had to leave several times because she didn't want me or my daughter here-that's one of the few times I ever saw BM physically slap SD right across the face. (she was being a snot and really BM shouldn't have hit her but we've all had it with her attitude)

BM told her right then and there that this was MY house-since I and DH support this house-we had a say NOT SD11 and I told her since my DD lives here full time-she stays. SD11 threw one of her fantabulous tantrums-needless to say she straightened out real fast after that weekend..

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