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Inlaws and skids :) **VENT**

Posted by on May. 8, 2012 at 5:22 PM
  • 69 Replies

In Fairytale everyone gets along. In reality-not really.

We all have a variety of skids-love'em,hate 'em,barely tolerate them,wish we could trade them in for better models.

Same goes for the in laws. How do you deal with the in laws?!

Since the day he was born-SS5 was always MIL's favorite (let me state for the record-she's got mental issues-like needs to be in a padded room mental issues). Every Friday BM would drop him off to MIL-she'd care for SS while DH was at work. Care for him on the weekends while Dh slept in.

SS was 9months when i came into his life. MIL liked me then.Until about 2 yrs ago-when MIL's parents passed=she started going off the deep end.

She started getting obsessive with SS. She would do her errands every Saturday-and would take SS with her-whether DH wanted her to or not. She basically co parented with DH until I moved in last year.

SS5 and I share a birthday. July 19th is our day. She actually told me 2 yrs ago I'm not allowed to celebrate "her grandson's birthday" because I'm not family and I don't count. Then wondered why DH refused to attend the birthday party she threw for SS. We instead attended a family party my parents threw for us both.

Then came "THE INCIDENT" SS5 was in a mood-refusing to obey me. After multiple calls his father at work-getting nowhere-I called BM for help-she offered to come pick him. This was on a Friday-MIL was suppose to take him overnight.

I called MIL to tell her NOT to come pick up SS because he wasn't going to be here-she went off on me. Barged into my house-assaulted me and BM both-told Us both we had no right "to keep her from her grandson" and how we BOTH deserve to lose our children.

All because SS5 was acting up and I called BM  for help. MIL and DH both actually told me I had no right to call BM and I should have let MIL deal with him. BM said "I'm his mother NOT HER"

"ENTER THE NOSY NEIGHBORS WHO LOVE CALLING THE PO PO"

MIL takes off speeding-nearly running over the neighbors trash cans-here come the cops-2 cars. One takes off after MIL. We talked to the cops-got shit straight.

Why do the in laws think they're entitled to these kids like this?! I understand MIL loves her grand kids (only the bios though SD11 and DD8 both get treated like shit because "they're not FAH-MILY" however this lady actually told me and BM-she has more right to this boy then we do!

How the fck is that possible?!

This was back in the fall this happened. MIL still comes every Sunday to visit-SS really doesn't bother with her. She fake cries with him and bribes him-but it never works.

The police told Dh to keep his mother away. She's not allowed in my house or on our property at ALL. If she wants to see or talk to DH-she calls the house phone (not my cell since I pay for that) and meets him down at the corner. And she knows I'm serious about her being banned. Every Time she comes around-I stand at the door holding the phone watching her.

Do any of your inlaws acting possessive of your skids?

My parents sure as hell don't. They love all the grand kids equally and spoil equally.



by on May. 8, 2012 at 5:22 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Tigress22304
by Platinum Member on May. 8, 2012 at 5:24 PM

The only reason I posted is because Mother's Day is coming up-and MIL's boo hooing DH isn't spending Mother's Day with her and SIL.

And she's oh-so-sad that SS's not allowed to be with her for Mother's Day either.

i shit you not.

MomGoingCrazy78
by Lindy Lou on May. 8, 2012 at 5:49 PM

I haven't spoken to my MIL in about a year and a half over some of the same stuff, she thinks she's both mother and father.

When I came into the picture, same as you, she was so used to doing things for SD, wouldn't even let my DH do them. I had kids the same age so SD also wanted to be with me. We made sure grandma also got an overnight a month and got to see her on a regular basis. I became the bad guy, so did my daughter. Grandma couldn't stand there was another little girl in the picture and started bad mouthing my daughter openly. Well I had a fit and cut ties with her. We made up about a year later and things were going better. I wouldn't leave her alone with my daughter, but other than that, things were "normal."

Fast forward a couple of years. She tried to regain control of SD, not doing what we asked her doing, just doing what she felt like. She even went to sign her up for things that neither parent had approved of or even knew about. My DH told her one thing, then I would catch her doing something else. She would be like, so this is MY granddaughter. I withdrew completely from the situation with her.

It took a few months of my DH dealing with her for him to realize just how his dear ol' mom was. He pulled the reigns in on her and from that moment on everything became my fault, still is to this day. I don't care if something happens and I'm out of town, she somehow makes it my fault!! No kidding. She even tried bad mouthing me to my SD to try to get her take her side of things (my SD didn't even know that grandma and I weren't getting along). My DH found out (through BM of all people which went over like a ton of bricks) and stopped his mom from seeing SD for a period of time. BM finally got so tired of dealing with my MIL that she threatened to pull SD from our house (not that she could, she just threatened). My DH became upset and told his mom that there was no way she would be the reason for him not to see his daughter.

Now we are at a place to where me, DH, and BM somewhat get along and grandma doesn't get a say in anything. She has to do what DH says or she's out of the picture. She could be locked up in a padded room also if her husband took her in (not joking on that either). I know eventually she will have another melt down, just don't know when. All I know is that I am thankful that I don't have to deal with her.

MomGoingCrazy78
by Lindy Lou on May. 8, 2012 at 5:52 PM

MIL won't even show up to SD birthday parties that we throw. She hasn't been to Christmas in a couple of years, I could go on....

pepper504
by Gold Member on May. 8, 2012 at 5:53 PM

Well, she IS his mother, crazy or not.  Maybe spending a couple of hours with her, if he truly wanted to, would work?

SS is NOT her child therefore, no grandson visit on Mother's Day UNLESS BM wanted to share some time with DH's mom, but from the way it sounds, ain't gonna happen in this lifetime.

She sounds like one piece of work.

rwblake2011
by on May. 8, 2012 at 5:58 PM
1 mom liked this
Im very lucky 1 I love my MIL 2 she lives in a whole other state. LOL
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Tigress22304
by Platinum Member on May. 8, 2012 at 6:03 PM


Quoting MomGoingCrazy78:

MIL won't even show up to SD birthday parties that we throw. She hasn't been to Christmas in a couple of years, I could go on....

i want your MIL!

Tigress22304
by Platinum Member on May. 8, 2012 at 6:06 PM


Quoting pepper504:

Well, she IS his mother, crazy or not.  Maybe spending a couple of hours with her, if he truly wanted to, would work?

SS is NOT her child therefore, no grandson visit on Mother's Day UNLESS BM wanted to share some time with DH's mom, but from the way it sounds, ain't gonna happen in this lifetime.

She sounds like one piece of work.

SS doesn't wanna be bothered with her. He's starting to see the issues MIL's caused with BM and myself. He doesn't like how she clings to him and tries to baby talk to him

it pisses him off really

And yeah as far as BM and I go-there's no WAY IN HELL that bitch is getting SS for Mother's Day. Neither of us want her around these kids PERIOD.

*it's nice to get along with Bm on 1 thing-and that's our hatred for his mother*

Tigress22304
by Platinum Member on May. 8, 2012 at 6:09 PM


Quoting rwblake2011:

Im very lucky 1 I love my MIL 2 she lives in a whole other state. LOL

i wish i had DD's paternal grandmother for a MIL.

She was a dream come true!!!

Let's just say she knew i was mom-i was the #1 boss when it came to DD-and Grandmom always backed me up no matter what!!

angelmommy2806
by on May. 8, 2012 at 6:11 PM
My Mil is awesome. My Fil could fall off a cliff and I wouldn't shed a tear. DH's parents have been divorced since he was 3. I lost complete respect for my Fil when my Bil lost his first son to anencephaly and he didn't come to the funeral. He didn't come because he said he had to work, but could have called and told them the situation. He sure as hell made it afterward though for the booze.
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....ClvrScn.
by Silver Member on May. 8, 2012 at 6:12 PM
I don't speak to my mother in law, because of the way she behaves towards my child. Bm asked me to keep mil away from SD.. so I do.. mil told bm she was going to take SD from her
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