UPDATE: If DH and I Stay Away From SS Will that send a message of our disapproval?
Thanks to all you SMs who gave your insight into our situation with SS. It's been a few weeks now and DH and I still have not heard a word from SS. All is calm and quiet here at our house. DH and I have not mentioned SS's name, and we are getting along really well. DH is more like himself than he has been in a long time; I really think he feels better not having to deal with all his son's drama, cruelties, and immaturity. Sadly, sometimes blood does not mean we can magically relate to one another as a family should. Maybe one day things will change, but for now I am using this time to heal emotionally with the help of my therapist and get my marriage back to normal. I still welcome your suggestions for growth and a "game plan" going forth. Just please don't suggest I have the SS over for dinner! LOL!!!!
Ever since some family problems began two years ago, now 24 year-old SS has been disrespectful towards me. My DH has tried talking with him, but nothiing has worked. SS didn't speak to me during the family Christmas gathering nor did he thank me for the money DH and I gave him as a gift. The final straw came a month ago when my DH's father died. SS was rude to me at his grandmother's house and at the funeral home. He turned his back towards me whenever I approached a group of people where he was. SS was a pallbearer and when he got to me in the family line at the funeral home (I was the last one in the line) before his grandfather's casket was closed, instead of shaking my hand or hugging me like he did everyone else, he turned his back and walked away from the line and out the door. My DH was standing beside me and saw the whole thing. DH observed other things SS did all weekend towards me that were rude. However, he also observed that I did everything I could to be polite and courteous. I wanted to make everything as easy as possible for my DH as I could. After all, his father had died. It was a sad occasion. As a result DH realizes that talking to SS doesn't help so DH isn't calliing SS nor is he making any attempt to go see SS's new house (SS has been asking DH to come see the house for the past seven months). So, SMs, do you think SS is getting the message that by our staying away DH doesn't approve of SS's behavior? We also took SD to a play and dinner in a nearby city and we didn't invite SS and his wife. What message do you think that sent SS? I need objective opinions. We are at our wits end with this SS. We do not have any contact with him right now.