I am the bm of three wonderful children who I have ful custody of. They have had their problems but we have been able to overcome them. After a very abusive marriage I was able to escape with my children. I married my prince charming who was everything I ever wanted (except rich) Along with my husband came two pre-teen daughters one which has special needs which he has full custody of. I know I love the girls and I want whats best for them at all times. They grew up with neglect from a drug abuser for a mother. The daughter that I thought was going to be a handful is the one with special needs but what I have realized is since she has been in home with consistency and rules she is doing exceptional. Her sister on the other hand is defiant, angry, and wants nothing to do with the family. She blames everything on her mom and wont take responsibility for her own actions. I want her to know she is loved and wanted in the family and I tell her all the time I love her. I dont know what to do she brings so much anger into the family and she lies constantly. She tries to keep to herself and ignore everyone else but she gives everyone dirty glares as she walks into a room. I know I am describing a defiant teenager here but I have never had a teenage girl here and I need some tools to work with my boys were never this hard to reach. I think a big difference is my kids have grown up with me and they know my rules and expectations and she is still trying to figure them out. I am going to have a baby within two weeks and I know with my lack of sleep my patience wont be getting any better anytime soon. I have no problem with loving other kids that I dint give birth too its just the raising them I am having a hard time with.