Friend Request? You don't even like me!

[Babujai]

I just got a FB friend request from my Skids' mom's sister. Let's call her Sandy!

BM and I get along great and I get on fine with her other two sisters, but Sandy has always been distant at best, poorly concealed hostile at worst.

Even though my SD's mother is her sister I've always gotten the impression that Sandy has feelings for my DH. He has nothing but friendship feelings and respect for her (Sandy raised his daughter for awhile while BM was being foolish and then finally getting herself together). Between his respect/esteem for her and her own hostility (and the fact that she outweighs me by a good 100 lbs) I've always been too intimidated to do anything more than stay out of her way.

Not sure what to do here. Don't wanna piss her off, but not sure I wanna make friends (if that's her intent) either. Some help, please?

[ErinRenee815]

Why wasn't DH raising his daughter while BM was getting herself together? Just ignore the request and put her out of your mind. 

[E_is_4_Ethan]

this

Quoting ErinRenee815:

Why wasn't DH raising his daughter while BM was getting herself together? Just ignore the request and put her out of your mind. 

[Babujai]

BM didn't tell him he had a daughter until she was 2. He helped her out with money when he could and he'd see his daughter when she'd let him. When their daughter was 6 she decided she wanted regular child support checks. So he wanted visitation rights. For that he needed to be on the birth certificate so he took a paternity test. Turns out, wasn't his daughter. He still loved her and wanted to take care of her, but he had no rights to her. It took a family tragedy (Sandy's youngest daughter died) for BM to realize that she should take family where she could get it and finally let SD be a part of our family.

Sandy is so important to my Skids (SD, her brother and BM's girlfriend's son) that I can't treat this lightly. There will be repercussions.

Quoting ErinRenee815:

Why wasn't DH raising his daughter while BM was getting herself together? Just ignore the request and put her out of your mind. 

[Babujai]

See response above.

Quoting E_is_4_Ethan:

this

Quoting ErinRenee815:

Why wasn't DH raising his daughter while BM was getting herself together? Just ignore the request and put her out of your mind. 

[angelmommy2806]

Ignore it?

[jlg12678]

Delete and block. Easy peasy.

[whatIknownow]

I have no problem denying friend requests. I like my privacy. Just deny it.

[Babujai]

If ignoring her was a constructive or sensible thing to do I'd have done that. I was looking for something more than avoidance and criticsm. But since you ladies have been absolutely no help, I decided to put on my big girl panties and confront her about her past behaviour and ask why she's reaching out to me now. Thanks anyway.

[ameliacaldeira]

i think SHE sees herself as the BM and probably feels she has the rights to your Dh too. wish i could help

[Bells2000]

deny/block is a really useful option on facebook!