Post anything and everything you can that makes your "step life" successful.
Mine are:
1) SO and I are mostly on the same page.
2) SS likes me.
3) I have support from SO's family AND BM's parents. (They even wanted me in a family Christmas picture.)
1) I have absolutly no contact w/ BM. At games i sit on the opposite side of bleachers or field or sit in car if thats not an option.
2) SO and i are on the same page/ have lots of support from his family, they actually call me mom when discussing SK's and i have to correct them. lol. I think that comes from us having a child together already though.
3) SK's respect me, but i have also been there since they were babies, so all they remember is Daddy and I together.
4) I work and SO is a SAHD, so he is big on the kids repecting me and also he does most of the disciplining and i get the fun part of bringing home suprises (donuts for breakfast cause i work thirds...).
5) I treat my SK's like my own DD, their half sister. I think treating them different would make them think i loved/liked them less than my DD.
2.) I let dh and bm parent and raise their child without interfering.
3.) I do not beat my ss with a belt or a paddle or anything else some loons deem necessary.....
I havent had my coffee yet, I'm sure more will come when I do.
On the flip side, my success with bf/sm is totally different.
1.) Bf and I so our best to work together on issues and try to think of what's best for odd.
2.) I do not hold visitation from him or use our child as any form of punishment.
3.) Sm and I talk regularly. While she does not meddle in the way bf and I raise our child, she will come to me with an issue if she really feels it's necessary.
4.) I HELP sm. Odd is a difficult little cookie, due to all the abuse she endured as a toddler/early child, so we have behavioral issues. Sometimes odd is mean just because she can be. Sm is one of the sweetest ladies I've ever met. If odd comes home and I find she was being a butt head to her, I sit her down and talk to her about sm, and then ask odd if she'd like to call and apologize to sm. She always says yes. Being a step parent is hard, and I'm thankful she and I can do this together.
I live in two different worlds in bm/sm relations. Key for me was figuring out what worked best in each sitch. For ss and bm, disengagement and no contact was the best way. For odd and bf and sm, being active in each others lives and constant communication made us successful.
Wish there was a dislike button.
:P
Quoting baparrot2:I do no harm.
BM's mother is a great woman and really helps with the boys on ensuring that they listen to me not as a mom but as another adult in their lives.
DH and I are mostly on the same page but we respect our differences about each set of kids (I have two girls, and he has two boys)
My ex is in the picture as another parent (he lives two blocks away) and even though the boys don't like me they are able to vent to my ex and hang out with him.
My girls respect my DH more than i have ever belived. I never thought my daddies girl would ever like my DH but she adores him and is always wanting "ryan time" she likes to hang out with him the garage like she does with her dad.
My family is a big help. My sister babysat the boys on a weekly basis before I even met DH so having the boys already a part of my side of the family helped with the transion.
I do wish my MIL would accept all the children (DH has custody of bio sons half brother) she only accepts her biograndson and could careless about the other three. I've already put my foot down about the new baby and told her until she can accept all four kids equally she would never see this baby. DH backs me up about it so I am greatful for that.
Quoting ManicAttack:Wish there was a dislike button.
:P
Quoting baparrot2:I do no harm.
Right?
Quoting Dana333810:
Lol why do you say that?
Quoting ManicAttack:
Wish there was a dislike button.
:P
Quoting baparrot2:
I do no harm.
Quoting Dana333810:
Lol why do you say that?
Quoting ManicAttack:Wish there was a dislike button.
:P
Quoting baparrot2:I do no harm.
Quoting baparrot2:Right?
Quoting Dana333810:
Lol why do you say that?
Quoting ManicAttack:
Wish there was a dislike button.
:P
Quoting baparrot2:
I do no harm.
They think she took him and ran...
- ManicAttack
on Jun. 21, 2012 at 3:09 AM