Quoting Starwar12:
Hi and thank you. Well, my situation might not be as bad as I make it seem but I'm stressed over it. I met my husband back in 2007 and moved in together when my son was about 1 year old. My step kids loved me until we moved in together . As soon as that happened, his youngest daughter wanted to share a bed with us even though she had her own room. We struggled with this for about 6 months. Soon after I was accused of calling them stupid which I didn't but caused huge turmoil which involved them, their mother and my husbands family and of course after so much pressure from his famly, he started accusing me himself. I had to fight to clear my name and even to this day, Its a bit complicated. Now my step daughter is 13 and going through all these changes and is rude and ugly with me and sweet and an angel when dad is around. Dad wouldn't believe me until he started noticing it and called her up on it. Dad works a lot and since it's summer, they are here most of the time cause mom works as well. As soon as dad leaves they find an excuse to leave and when I invite them to do something, she says for some excuse or another. I try everything I can and she still won't give in and I feel like I'm not getting through
Maybe you shouldnt be used my both your DH and her bio mother as babysitter. I would never make my DH watch my daughter if they didnt get along. Also, this would give her a chance to rebuild a relationship with her that isnt forced. I know how it is though I watch my SD in the summer as well but as soon as she says she doesnt want to stay with me I will gladly redirect her parents to some great summer camps.
She also might be acting out bc she misses her dad. I know that my SD acts out alot when she starts to miss her parents by the end of the week Im practically shoving her on her parents bc I have mentally checked out LOL. Keep in mind that 13 can also be a very tough age!! She sounds like a normal teenager.
I think you guys need counsling. Do you think that BM is putting things in her head and yes shes a teenage so that is not an easy age to deal with. oh and maybe you shouldnt be alone with her . this will prevent any he said she said issues.
Welcome to the group!
I would suggest counseling. Maybe even go in as a family. They can give dad some excellent ways to deal with a 13 year daughter and may also give you help for when the children are with you. If you don't want to leave your husband but feel you need to to get away from the stress, I would also suggest disengaging. Let BM and BF handle everything with the step children.
SS ten years old w anxiety?
Appropriate or not? Emotional BM
- Starwar12
on Jun. 25, 2012 at 5:08 PM