BM demands

[ShannaBee]

BM demands that when she visits with SS, or takes him over there to drop him of, that  they are to take down all pictures of DH. My MIL told me that little gem this weekend. But, she hasn't been letting them see him because the last time she showed up at the inlaws house, me and DH were there visiting.

Does the BM to your SK(s) have any ridiculous demands?

[mrsboomtastic]

1) I can not be In the car during exchange
2) I cannot look at bm or her mom
3) I have to wait at the end of the block if at bms moms house, they hate me.
4) I can not tell ss anything at all

We just laugh at her and her crazy mothers demands. I've never followed any of these. Sometimes, I wave to them lol

[casey.foster09]

Yea she wants to keep his last name, marry someone else and have kids. I think if they have kids and she gives them dh's last name, I'll change mine and dd's. Jk but I'm just sick of having no choices but he can have everything she wants.

[Lasttime]

dude, no one EVER gets sick from fast food!   LMAO

I'm still laughing about all of this.  Betty Fucking Crocker.  Tee hee hee.  Jealous much?

Quoting rose0919:

lol yup . lets put it this way, i am italian, i was pretty much  brought  up in the kitchen. just about everything i make is from scratch.except for the occasional "treat" of a quick meal. once a month maybe. we do tons of veggies,and have a very good diet. bm doesnt cook its either fast food, out of a box or frozen. the only meal she "cooks" is her chicken breast , and what that is she covers chicken breast with mayonaise and bakes it. ss has told his mother in the past that i am the best cook ever. thats why i got the nickname betty fuc$%^ crocker from her.

Quoting Lasttime:

Yes, McDonald's it TOTALLY better than your cooking.  That is soooo not an unreasonable demand.  :) Holy crap.

Quoting rose0919:

why would she want the pictures down that is silly . doesn't your dh see his child? talk about pas wow. 

our bm used to send food  because she told us he was allergic to my cooking. she would send 2 slices of baloney cut up for each meal and 2 slices of cheese cut up for each meal.and a juice box for each meal. with orders it was all he was to get to eat.or we could take him to McDonald's. uuuum yeah right. 

ss is not allergic to anything.  it was her way of trying to control

[Lasttime]

OMg, seriously?  HA HA HA HA HA!  Number 2 is hilarious!!

Quoting mrsboomtastic:

1) I can not be In the car during exchange
2) I cannot look at bm or her mom
3) I have to wait at the end of the block if at bms moms house, they hate me.
4) I can not tell ss anything at all

We just laugh at her and her crazy mothers demands. I've never followed any of these. Sometimes, I wave to them lol

[mirm99]

She used to... But no one listens to her so she gave up..

[CFSTBSM27]

No thank goodness

[needsupport100]

if it wasn't against the decree-i'd probably do it, just cause she said not to

[OregonMom80]

Oh, we didn't actually do it.  DH asked if her bf was still coming to everything (and her during his time) and she said yes, he just laughed at her and said, "well, my WIFE has more right to be at things than your BOYFRIEND, so if he can come to whatever he wants, then so can she."  He also told her that if she was so worried about who was in the car, she could stay in the house instead of walking outside everytime to "collect" DSS.  DH was more than happy to walk him to the door so she didn't have to see me . . . otherwise, he'd drive home alright, but she could make the extra hour RT drive to pick DSS up - he wasn't doing it.

Quoting MonkeyDoodleMom:

I was banned from attending a lot of AD's activities too, and apparently my presence in the car when my fiance picked up SD was "traumatic" for BM. That was 3+ yrs ago though.

Luckily, we have come a VERY LONG way, at least with BM. BM knows I care about SD and the best thing for SD to feel supported is if her WHOLE family is there, and that means Mom, Dad, her half sister (our DD) and me.

BM's father and sister still won't go to stuff if I am going. We linitially et BM explain to SD why. If she does ask her dad or me, our answer is, sometimes grown-ups just don't get along, but it is her Gpa's or Aunt's choice to miss out.

Cuz, WE are gonna be there to see her dance/do Brownies stuff/ whatever--because we love her and we're excited to share in her events. At her last dance recital, BM even sat with SO, DD, and me... And SD was grinning ear to ear.

Quoting OregonMom80:

Oh we had a whole list before. She could attend all DSS's stuff and her bf, but I wasn't to be at anything and she didn't understand why DH had to come to ECs during her time. If I was with DH, she wanted him to drive to our house to drop me even if we were by her house. Yep, an hour RT just so I wasn't sitting in the car at her house. She wants DH to arrange his plans so she has DSS every year on Christmas even though they're supposed to alternate. She should get DSS every year for his b day because she gave birth to him.

[needsupport100]

technically they can't ban anyone from the property without a court order especially if said person remains in the car

[1SpaZZedMom]

I'm not sure what to say to this...

How absolutely awful that BM wants to completely erase DAD from SSs life and memories, but keep the grandparents involved! Just not normal! I know that you guys have had a horrible time and road with BM and SS....

This is just horrendous in my opinion. I would say that is a fight that your MIL and BM need to have and if MIL wants to see SS... she'll keep BM happy just to see her grandson. I would hope that MIL would present a good argument that it is her house and her son therefore she isn't going to change her decor just for a visitor - whom is her grandson and child of her son. 

But, whatever happens, happens....