Background Info - My DH has a 12 yr. old BD who, as long as I have know her ( 6 years) has always been a handful (bad behaviors). Well, she lived with DH before we were married but now lives with BM and has been for about 4 years. My SD and her siblings come to visit over the weekend once or twice a month. So far everything has been fine. Until...I had placed one of my orders (I sell Mary Kay.) of a lip gloss and lipstick on the stairs so I could take it with me when I left later in the week. Well, when I went to deliver the order, I noticed the gloss was missing! So, I'm thinking and thinking, trying to remember how and when I put it in there and I know I did. I had even told my customer that I was going to send it as a free gift.
After I looked all the places that it could have 'fallen' out , I hesitantly, spoke to my DH about it. Without me, asking him to ask her, he knew that that's what he should do. So he calls over to BM house and has grandma look in the girls' purses and asks both his BDs if they had seen the gloss. "No," they both replied.
So a week or so later the children are at the pool with their BM and Aunt and the 12 yr. old girl begans to glossify her lips and her cousin's lips. Auntie and BM ask where she got it from and SD lies and says that I gave it to her. They took the gloss from her....sounded fishy, I suppose.
During the next visit with the Skids, the youngest girl tells DH what happened at the pool. He is as upset as am I. Now that a week or two has passed it's time to see the Skids again....tomorrow. DH has cooled off a bit and thinks that her punishment should be to only miss our trip to the beach. I think it should be more. Not only do I feel violated, I feel disrespected. I am holding back my anger from DH because he's kind of not as upset as I am. Help! What should her punishment be? What should I say to her? How can I make sure that this doesn't happen again?