Ok, so last night, SD tells me and DH that her tooth hurts. I asked her if it was her loose one, she says no. She shows us and plain as day you can see a filling already halfway out of her tooth. DH asked her if it just started hurting. She said no, that she had told BM and BM's mom when she was down (ok, that was the end of April beginning of May!). She said her gma told her she needed to go to the dentist, but BM didn't say anything (she never called DH about it either). SD said it stopped hurting for awhile and when she was eating tonight it started hurting again.
DH called BM and told her, BM was like, oh yeah, I remember her saying it hurt. Umm, why didn't you call the dentist or at least call DH when it first started hurting???? DH told her that we would try to get her into the dentist tomorrow to get it fixed, if they didn't have an opening then it might have to be on one of BM's days. She says ok, just let me know and to go ahead an make the appt for one of her days if we have to, that we could take her whenever. I don't understand why BM won't just call the dentist when SD tooth first started hurting??? I mean, if it's a transportation issue, all BM has to do is let us know when the appt is and we can find a way to get SD to the dentist. But no, she leaves it alone and waits for us to find it when it's a bigger problem. Just frustrating...
Well, this morning I text BM to let her know when the appt is for today (dentist had one cancellation so I was able to get SD in today), and she still has not replied. Then again, that's par. I guess I am going to have to take off work to take her since DH is already taking off tomorrow to go on SD field trip with her.
I am just glad that her tooth will be fixed before we go on vacation!
It gets better u have to go thru these moments. My SD had simlar situations all the time I was so fed up with BM but then they grow up(BM) and if they don't the children do and the dynamics change. Just be supportive and try not to speak negatively watch how things change. Becase they will. My SD is a wonderful well adjusted and mature college student who is more mature than most of her peers. Thank God!! But remember we didn't start that way.
My DH has 50/50, so yes we've seen her. There has been a HUGE history of BM negecting SD teeth from the time SD was very little. SD had to have crowns put on at 3 because of neglect (DH had to get the court to intervene since it was during their divorce). Dentist wrote testimony to neglect on BM's part. BM has a history of ignoring when SD tells her something hurts or trying to give SD a "placebo" to make it better (think sugar water). BM is supposed to call dentist/DH right away to make an appt or have DH make an appt, she didn't, she ignored what SD said to her. Heck, even Bm mom's told BM that SD needed to go to the dentist after looking at her tooth (SD said that gma asked BM before she left if BM had made an appt for the tooth, BM told gma no). BM chose not to make an appt or call DH. SD said it stopped hurting shortly after that and now it started hurting again. This time I'm just glad she was with us, because we take care of it. It's just the same thing, again, and again, and again...
Quoting Pero1:
So the girl complained once, at the end of April, that her tooth hurt? Have you seen your SD since then?
Well so far it's been 7 years... I sure hope it gets better. It's still the same old song and dance routine with dentist/doctors right now though. We never bad mouth BM to SD or even where she could hear or to anyone who might say something to her. We try to keep her "sheltered" from it, but as she's getting older, she's figuring a lot of stuff out on her own. Just wish BM would figure it out, ya know? Bm will make a comment like I want to start making appt, taking SD, being more involved and DH and I are like great. Then it just doesn't seem to happen like that.
Quoting shayhaugh:
It gets better u have to go thru these moments. My SD had simlar situations all the time I was so fed up with BM but then they grow up(BM) and if they don't the children do and the dynamics change. Just be supportive and try not to speak negatively watch how things change. Becase they will. My SD is a wonderful well adjusted and mature college student who is more mature than most of her peers. Thank God!! But remember we didn't start that way.
Quoting MomGoingCrazy78:My DH has 50/50, so yes we've seen her. There has been a HUGE history of BM negecting SD teeth from the time SD was very little. SD had to have crowns put on at 3 because of neglect (DH had to get the court to intervene since it was during their divorce). Dentist wrote testimony to neglect on BM's part. BM has a history of ignoring when SD tells her something hurts or trying to give SD a "placebo" to make it better (think sugar water). BM is supposed to call dentist/DH right away to make an appt or have DH make an appt, she didn't, she ignored what SD said to her. Heck, even Bm mom's told BM that SD needed to go to the dentist after looking at her tooth (SD said that gma asked BM before she left if BM had made an appt for the tooth, BM told gma no). BM chose not to make an appt or call DH. SD said it stopped hurting shortly after that and now it started hurting again. This time I'm just glad she was with us, because we take care of it. It's just the same thing, again, and again, and again...
I think I might be missing some background here ... teeth don't just rot from one day to the next. Is your DH not allowed to take your SD to the dentist? What about regular check-ups?
DH had moved to Cali for 9 months when SD was 2 to get a job, save money for a house (he stayed with BM parents), so that BM and SD would move out there with him. This is when SD teeth rotted. BM finally told DH that they weren't moving so DH came back. They filed for divorce shortly after. So, since SD was 3, DH and I have taken care of all/most dental (BM was at 1 appt). This is why BM is supposed to either make an appt and let us know, or call DH so he can make the appt. DH or I take SD to all of her check-ups.
Sorry I didn't give all background, there's just a lot of it.
Quoting Pero1:
Quoting MomGoingCrazy78:
My DH has 50/50, so yes we've seen her. There has been a HUGE history of BM negecting SD teeth from the time SD was very little. SD had to have crowns put on at 3 because of neglect (DH had to get the court to intervene since it was during their divorce). Dentist wrote testimony to neglect on BM's part. BM has a history of ignoring when SD tells her something hurts or trying to give SD a "placebo" to make it better (think sugar water). BM is supposed to call dentist/DH right away to make an appt or have DH make an appt, she didn't, she ignored what SD said to her. Heck, even Bm mom's told BM that SD needed to go to the dentist after looking at her tooth (SD said that gma asked BM before she left if BM had made an appt for the tooth, BM told gma no). BM chose not to make an appt or call DH. SD said it stopped hurting shortly after that and now it started hurting again. This time I'm just glad she was with us, because we take care of it. It's just the same thing, again, and again, and again...
I think I might be missing some background here ... teeth don't just rot from one day to the next. Is your DH not allowed to take your SD to the dentist? What about regular check-ups?
Well the dentist ended up having to pull her tooth, at least it was a baby tooth!
sounds like my BM-only she took SD11 to the dentist-the dentist said they weren't touching the tooth because of "EXPOSED NERVES" she came over that weekend (before christmas) she was in such pain-but BM swore the dentist couldn't do shit-DH took one look at her tooth-rushed her to the ER-they were able to remove the tooth safely. The adult tooth was already coming in-but the baby tooth wasn't ready to leave yet.
POINT IS-they yanked the tooth-she's been fine. BM isn't exactly all that great with oral hygiene=she's lost 10 of her own teeth already because of failure to clean/floss
so of course i dont expect her kids to have good teeth either
I hope your sd's pain free soon!!
OUCH!! Good for your DH for doing something about it!
BM has always been very good about her own oral care, when she was married to my DH, she went to dentist 2x a year for cleanings, even had to have a minor surgery on her mouth/gums. Yet she has always lacked when it comes to SD, I just don't get it. Heck, my kids go to the dentist more than I do! I make sure of that. BM doesn't have SD brush her teeth at night when she's over there (we have told SD to do so, but we can't make her at BM, only BM can). At our house, the kids are on a stict routine of how they brush their teeth. My DD has only had 1 cavity in her life and DS hasn't had any. SD does the same routine when she's with us, but that's only half the time. Sometimes it just drives me crazy! The part that scares me is that SD is about to lose all of her baby teeth, then its her adult teeth we are talking about. I really don't want to think about.
Quoting Tigress22304:
sounds like my BM-only she took SD11 to the dentist-the dentist said they weren't touching the tooth because of "EXPOSED NERVES" she came over that weekend (before christmas) she was in such pain-but BM swore the dentist couldn't do shit-DH took one look at her tooth-rushed her to the ER-they were able to remove the tooth safely. The adult tooth was already coming in-but the baby tooth wasn't ready to leave yet.
POINT IS-they yanked the tooth-she's been fine. BM isn't exactly all that great with oral hygiene=she's lost 10 of her own teeth already because of failure to clean/floss
so of course i dont expect her kids to have good teeth either
I hope your sd's pain free soon!!
2 year old actuaully called me a b***h
- MomGoingCrazy78
on Jul. 12, 2012 at 10:29 AM