Hello! I have never posted on here before and I just wanted to get some feedback on how to deal with this situation. I have a SD that is turning 7 next week. She is adorable and I love her in every way. I have been in her life for 3 1/2 years now and her mom has taken off (for the second time in her short life) for 2 years now. My problem is that recently she has started saying some pretty mean things to me. The most recent one was her calling me the DEVIL! I couldn't believe it!
I think some of it may be because of my strictness with her: I am pretty observant of everything she does, I have yet to learn how to tune things out or pick my battles. I am so afraid of anything happening to her that I tend to be (and I can't believe I am opening myself up for what could be attacks here) what I would consider overbearing. I think this could be part of it however I also think she is mad at me for her BM's failings. I want to be the best of both worlds to her because she doesn't deserve the raw deal she was given. I love on her and take her places with me to have a date day, but I also am the first one to notice when she does something wrong. I feel like a terrible person sometimes and I get resentful that I am the one that she seems to turn on.
Her father tends to just tune everything out and watch tv as most dads do but I get irrated because it feels as though it is left to me to deal with which creates more hostility towards me. It is a vicisous cycle that I cannot seem to figure out how to get out of. If ANYONE has been through this and knows how to stop being so rigid or what I can do to help her with her anger towards me please let me know! I need help.