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Daughter is 8 and never nice and lying to get others in trouble

Posted by on Aug. 14, 2012 at 2:47 PM
  • 16 Replies

OK so my 8 year old princess is constantly mean to other children.  She is mean to her brother, step brothers, friends, cousins and just about any one.  She wasn't always like this.  She started hanging out with a little devil child about two years ago in our neighborhood but the little girl moved several months ago and so did we but she still acts horrible.  For instance, her step brother was over yesterday.  She walks in the house from cheerleading and sees him and says um isnt he supposed to be at his moms, ugh, when is he leaving.  Ok yes they pester each other but that is expected.  She always tells him anytime she sees him when are you leaving or says to me and his father when is he going to his moms im ready for him to go.  Or if he walks in the kitchen she says EEEWWW its you.  All without provocation.  I dont know how to make her be nice.  She used to be my sweet little baby girl and now all i see is the old neighbor kid coming out in her and i want to run screaming down the street.  How do I make her be nice.  How do I make her understand what she says hurts.  Oh and she also lies about what the three boys do to get htem in trouble because she thinks its funny.  HELP

by on Aug. 14, 2012 at 2:47 PM
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Replies (1-10):
raerae725
by Silver Member on Aug. 14, 2012 at 2:52 PM
What do you do when she says those type of things? SD and DS are going thru a phase like that atm. Normally they get along.
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frankiebacon
by on Aug. 14, 2012 at 2:53 PM

 hmm lying is tough issue..I have that problem with my three littel ones. Some of the lies are too just get other in trouble while others are out of fear of gettign in trouble. I try at all times to encourage honesty but.. eh.. lemme know how it works out.

I would ask her the next tiem she lies to get her brothers in troube what kind of punishment she was hoping for them to get and give it to her. As far as the not nice comments send her ot her room to think abotu why it was nice to say and then have her APOLOGIZE. EVERY time!

ctaylor1211
by on Aug. 14, 2012 at 3:09 PM

i do and I have grounded her, put her in time out and spanked her for being mean but she just does it again in about an hour.  Her father was a cumpulsive liar his entire life and I am wondering if its a trait from his genes.  But even if, I have to get her to stop before its too late to change it.  I dont want her ending up where her dad is

raerae725
by Silver Member on Aug. 14, 2012 at 3:21 PM
She understands she is hurting people? How old are her siblings? What reaction does she get from them? Mine are older and only do it to each other. DS7 can be very rude, but he thinks it's ok if he if joking. He feels remorse and sincerely apologizes when he realizes feelings were hurt.

Quoting ctaylor1211:

i do and I have grounded her, put her in time out and spanked her for being mean but she just does it again in about an hour.  Her father was a cumpulsive liar his entire life and I am wondering if its a trait from his genes.  But even if, I have to get her to stop before its too late to change it.  I dont want her ending up where her dad is

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SassyMom25
by Gold Member on Aug. 14, 2012 at 3:40 PM
I would point it out when she says it, how rude it is and demand her to apologize. Its embarassing getting in trouble in front of others so maybe it will curb it some. How is she around her friends?
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ctaylor1211
by on Aug. 14, 2012 at 4:26 PM

Her Bio Brother is 11 and the two step are 13 and 10.  The only ones that she constantly messes with are her step.  They get right back on her when she says something to them either they come tattle tale or they scream at her or say mean things back to her and she comes and cries and tattles on them.  Sassymom she is mean to her friends too.  She doesn't realize her tone sometimes and other times she is just mean.  But when someone is mean to her she cries for hours I dont get it. 

Tigress22304
by Platinum Member on Aug. 14, 2012 at 4:27 PM
1 mom liked this

Bm's SD13 is like this to anyone she comes into contact with-I would make her apologize. She's being very disrespectful. And if she continues to treat ppl like dirt-then maybe the same should be done to her.

Pull her out of her EC's. Make her do volunteer work. She needs to be knocked down a peg or two.

surprisedmom22
by Member on Aug. 14, 2012 at 4:39 PM

I always tell my dd to treat people the way you want to be treated. When that doesn't work (she is 7); I treat her the same way she is treating others....THAT works...that gets her attention cause she has to pay the price.  I have tried punishment (time out); but that doesn't always seem to get through as well as the being treated the same.

we have gone through the exaggeration stage (stilling going through it) - when she exaggerates what someone else said or did etc... If we know it is really exaggerated - we ask her "do you mean - then state whatever the truth is" and she says"well, yea" sometimes; other times she says no, they did...exaggerated...then we have to exaggerate something she does...it seems to work.

We don't do it where it will embarass her, but we do show her how she is acting...etc...She may know she is doing this or that - but she doesn't KNOW it...KWIM?

E_is_4_Ethan
by Platinum Member on Aug. 14, 2012 at 4:44 PM

therapy

ctaylor1211
by on Aug. 14, 2012 at 4:49 PM

lol therapy was my next option

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