DH and I have 3 children. My son attended our local university for 4 years while living at home and receiving our state's tuition scholarships. He then completed another 4 years of a doctoral program using student loans totaling $145,000. My SS who also lives in our town chose to move 35 miles away to attend a private 4 year college to major in general business. He could easily done this at our local university while living at home. (all he has done with his degree is work for his SF in an auto parts store). Three years later SD did the same thing. After attending the pricey private college for 2 years and one semester she decided she didn't like her college major and dropped out and moved back home. Now a year later she has started taking general courses at a technical college so hopefully she will be accepted into a program there NEXT year. Before SD went back to college that last semester she asked DH for help with college expenses. We talked to her about getting college loans like my son had done and she said she and her mother weren't interested in loans. She said since her mother and SF had done everything for her brother that they thought DH should now help her with her expenses. I suggested she look into the Pell Grant. So that's where we left it basically. She went back to school and my DH didn't give her any money. Then she left school at the end of the semester when did changed her mind about being a teacher (can't blame her). DH and I could not afford to help her with a private college education and #2 DH felt that since he didn't help his DS (he paid CS until his DS was 21) it wouldn't be right to do for one what he didn't do for the other, and #3 we also hadn't been able to help my son with his expenses and he was forced to incur $145,000 in debt. Now months later the SD is writng on FB about how she has been "angry, sad, and afraid" over the last few months, but has realized what great parents she has...her BM and SF (inserting their names). Is she trying to, without actually saying anything to us, make a point that she is mad at us about all this or is she just being a 20 year old and these FB posts have nothing to do with us? Am I being too sensitive? She is very nice when I talk to her or see her, but she does not call us nor does she come for visits (I talk over text, FB and email mostly and with her dad via text and phone once in awhile). I stay out of everything. with DH and his kids I just want help her own peace of miind.