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BM trying to take kids to TX

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So my DF got told last week that his DD's BM wants to up and move with the girls to TX because her new hubby of just over a year has a chance at a job there making $28 an hour.  This would mean that my DF and I would never get to see the girls again.  I told him that she just cant up and leave with out his permission, plus it needs to be on file with the courts and a new visitation schedule and cs set up needs to be put in place.  He didn't believe me luckily about 6 other people told him the exact same thing and his mom called and made an apt with him for a lawyer next week Tuesday big problem is his ex wants an answer by this Friday.  No matter what she is going to have to file with courts I told him.  He is affraid that because he wont get to see his kids as often and what not that his cs is going to be raised.  She already get almost half of each of his paycheck each time he gets paid and we are barely able to keep our heads above water.  I am unsure about what to do.  I will miss the girls like crazy to me it would be like taking my own kids away from me as well.  Any advice and suggestions I would love them.

by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 1:39 PM
Replies (41-45):
DDDaysh
by on Oct. 4, 2012 at 5:43 PM

 That shows a ridiculous lack of caring on both their parts then. 

Quoting PROGENITOR:

Neither DH nor SSs mom knew what it said until I pointed it out to him. Some people are that dumb when it comes to bothering to read the agreement. Both DH and SSs mom fell into this category.

Quoting DDDaysh:

 I see several problems with this. 

First - how does your DH not know what his own Court Order says about relocation?  If he doesn't know, how can you be so cetain that Mom actually needs his permission? 

 


 

ShannaBee
by on Oct. 4, 2012 at 5:49 PM
This


Quoting newstepmom61811:

Does your DH not know what the current CO says about her rights to move with the children?


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
PROGENITOR
by on Oct. 4, 2012 at 5:50 PM

Yep. This goes back to my comment about not considering either of SSs parents to be "dedicted." Of course DH looked over the agreement and started pointing things out within six months of the final order.....I can recall her looking at it years down the road (after we furnished her with a copy, since she couldn't even find hers) and she was all shocked because she had been looking at the wrong copy all along and didn't realize some of the stuff in it. She even commented on her lawyer being crappy after some of the stuff in the final order was pointed out to her.

Quoting DDDaysh:

 That shows a ridiculous lack of caring on both their parts then. 

Quoting PROGENITOR:

Neither DH nor SSs mom knew what it said until I pointed it out to him. Some people are that dumb when it comes to bothering to read the agreement. Both DH and SSs mom fell into this category.

Quoting DDDaysh:

 I see several problems with this. 

First - how does your DH not know what his own Court Order says about relocation?  If he doesn't know, how can you be so cetain that Mom actually needs his permission? 

 


 


brittani
by on Oct. 4, 2012 at 7:55 PM
Thank you. I can't wait to move back. Ill be 6 months pregnant at the time but idc I'm just happy to be moving back.


Quoting macbudsmom:

Wow thats awesome! I hope the move goes well for you.




Quoting brittani:

This is one of the reasons I'm moving back. At the time I moved away the birth father didn't want much of anything to do with ds but over the past few years bf has come around and I don't want to be the thing between them. So were moving back!






Quoting macbudsmom:

I never understand how either parent can either move away or take the kids away. Yes you can still maintain a relationship but its not the same as being there for the little things, pt conferences, ball games, recitals, etc...







Parents shouldnt be so selfish.



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nena8790
by Member on Oct. 5, 2012 at 12:46 PM

 Wow, the same thing happend to us last year!!!! (this is kinda long but trust me it's good info)

I am not sure what your law in your state but in our case a CO was in order with a set schedule that they both followed. Well BM went and reopened the case asking the court to grant her permission to leave the state. A court date was set and the judge heard both sides. The judge based his decision on what was in the best interest of the child was. Because she is part of a native american tribe she was offered assistance but she had to be living in their jurisdiction. She has primary physical custody of their son so that played a huge part in her favor. Had my husband and her shared physical custody then the outcome would have been different but they don't. My husband and his son have a very close relationship and told the judge that it was very important that they continue to have the same regular and consistant visitation schedule that had already been established. Any how because her reasons would better the life style of my SS the judge granted her permission to leave. A new schedule was set forth allowing my husband to have his son over all the school vacations the school in the their new state allowed even though he was not in school yet.

In your husbands case, she is not allowed to just leave and take his children unless she gets permission from the courts which is a process that could take 6 mo or more. If she does he can call the police and they will make her come back weather she likes it of not. That would be a fellony and she can get in a lot of trouble for that weather they have a court order established or not! He can ask the courts to lower his child support based on how the children will be be brought to his visitation. In our case, because she wanted to leave she is responsible for bringing him all the way back to our state and we then have to meet half way when he is returned. We will be going back to court to modify that though. We feel that because she is getting child support and it was her idea to leave then she has to pay for the full transportation. Either that or have my husbands child support lowered.

 

Good luck, and if you have any other questions feel free to ask.

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