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So yall think its ok to bash

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Its ok to bash, no biggy but bringing past posts up in a present post is wrong.

Yes I'm a SM at 23, dh is 41 and has 6 other kids. Their ages are 22, 20, 20, 19, 16 and 11. Out of the 6 only 3 are dh bio kids. Its confusing I know. He basically adopted the other 3. He has 3 other BMs too.

22 and 20 has the same mom and different dad but dh adopt the 20 year old, 20 and 19 has the same mom different dad but dh adopted the 20 year old and 16 and 11 and again same mom different and dh adopted the 16 year old. I hope I made sense on that. So 3 BM besides me.

I don't care what ages the kids are, I didn't marry dh for that. I married him because I love him altough we have problem that can be fixed.

Some of you said to 'leave' ut I can't because of the problems with sd11 and dh. No way in hell I would leave a marriage for a fixable problem. I might get bashed ans I might get disrespected by you all but your opinions right now don't count. I do think of dd and ds everytime I argue with dh. Sometimes it is about sd11 or sd19 but we always fix it. You all just read what you want to read and not the importance of a post. Some of you are flat mean and doeant like what others writes. I vent a lot because that keeps me calm no matter how y'all see it I do vent. Do you all vent? Or do you keep.it in til you blow up? If I keep it in I tend to.have a violent rage against everybody that gets in my way. So I cone here and vent.
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by on Oct. 6, 2012 at 9:19 PM
Replies (21-30):
AmyB118
by NA Rocks on Oct. 7, 2012 at 1:11 AM

Noooo.....I'm smart enough to have NOT gotten close to that trainwreck in the first place.  He'd never have made it past a cup of coffee, so there'd be no chance for me to "love" him.....

Age makes one notice the signs long before they open their mouths....yeah, you'll learn that one day....

Quoting parisonmom:

Whatever! As long as that is what you would do because you don't care. Well I love dh and I wouldn't run because of the mess.


Quoting AmyB118:

Hell...ALL that should be a red flag.  NO way in hell I'd get involved in that mess.  I seem to remember your being told to run like hell b/c you are too young to have to deal w/that cluster fuck.  

MOST women closer to your DH's age would see the crazy in it and have turned around and headed for the hills immediately.  You have fun w/that....it's only going to get better.  


Quoting parisonmom:

When dh met his first wife, she ran away with his dd. Whe. Dh found his dd his ex had another child so he let that child call him dad. With his other wife, she was 8 months pregnant when dh and her met, so dh adopted that child, with his other wife, she had a 7 year old child when she met dh so he adopted her too.



Its not a red flag, its life.





Quoting newwife1:

I have no idea what you mean about your husband and all these women and kids with different dads? Were these different women cheating on him and getting pregnant and then he adopted all those kids? By the younger of the sets of kids being adopted, except the youngest it's how it seems.

Sorry, but that would be a huge red flag.






parisonmom
by Member on Oct. 7, 2012 at 1:11 AM
Maybe so, but that's ths past this is the present.


Quoting dallas4nu:

You say u wouldn't leave yet you've posted about wanting to end things because of SD.



U can't post things and expect ppl will forget and treat you like an op they've never seen before. That's what anon in mc is for.

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parisonmom
by Member on Oct. 7, 2012 at 1:15 AM
Ok?!? So your saying because YOU wouldn't mean what? Its the point that it don't matter about HIS past. Only the present and future.

I knew what I was getting into before I married him. BUt I didn't see the mess because I don't think of a mess I think of a family that need structure. Dh is my husband and his kids are apart of our lifes.


Quoting AmyB118:

Noooo.....I'm smart enough to have NOT gotten close to that trainwreck in the first place.  He'd never have made it past a cup of coffee, so there'd be no chance for me to "love" him.....

Age makes one notice the signs long before they open their mouths....yeah, you'll learn that one day....


Quoting parisonmom:

Whatever! As long as that is what you would do because you don't care. Well I love dh and I wouldn't run because of the mess.





Quoting AmyB118:

Hell...ALL that should be a red flag.  NO way in hell I'd get involved in that mess.  I seem to remember your being told to run like hell b/c you are too young to have to deal w/that cluster fuck.  

MOST women closer to your DH's age would see the crazy in it and have turned around and headed for the hills immediately.  You have fun w/that....it's only going to get better.  



Quoting parisonmom:

When dh met his first wife, she ran away with his dd. Whe. Dh found his dd his ex had another child so he let that child call him dad. With his other wife, she was 8 months pregnant when dh and her met, so dh adopted that child, with his other wife, she had a 7 year old child when she met dh so he adopted her too.





Its not a red flag, its life.








Quoting newwife1:

I have no idea what you mean about your husband and all these women and kids with different dads? Were these different women cheating on him and getting pregnant and then he adopted all those kids? By the younger of the sets of kids being adopted, except the youngest it's how it seems.

Sorry, but that would be a huge red flag.









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AmyB118
by NA Rocks on Oct. 7, 2012 at 1:22 AM
1 mom liked this

Wow....Where's my white flag?  Shit.....it's here somewhere.....

Good luck with all that....You love him and his children so much that sometimes you have to vent before you fly into a violent rage?  Being so pissed at someone that you want to act out violently (not sure WHICH one of them you want to hurt but whatever) is a fixable problem?  Sounds like a regular party at your house on the daily.  Have a good one.

Quoting parisonmom:

Ok?!? So your saying because YOU wouldn't mean what? Its the point that it don't matter about HIS past. Only the present and future.

I knew what I was getting into before I married him. BUt I didn't see the mess because I don't think of a mess I think of a family that need structure. Dh is my husband and his kids are apart of our lifes.


Quoting AmyB118:

Noooo.....I'm smart enough to have NOT gotten close to that trainwreck in the first place.  He'd never have made it past a cup of coffee, so there'd be no chance for me to "love" him.....

Age makes one notice the signs long before they open their mouths....yeah, you'll learn that one day....


Quoting parisonmom:

Whatever! As long as that is what you would do because you don't care. Well I love dh and I wouldn't run because of the mess.





Quoting AmyB118:

Hell...ALL that should be a red flag.  NO way in hell I'd get involved in that mess.  I seem to remember your being told to run like hell b/c you are too young to have to deal w/that cluster fuck.  

MOST women closer to your DH's age would see the crazy in it and have turned around and headed for the hills immediately.  You have fun w/that....it's only going to get better.  



Quoting parisonmom:

When dh met his first wife, she ran away with his dd. Whe. Dh found his dd his ex had another child so he let that child call him dad. With his other wife, she was 8 months pregnant when dh and her met, so dh adopted that child, with his other wife, she had a 7 year old child when she met dh so he adopted her too.





Its not a red flag, its life.








Quoting newwife1:

I have no idea what you mean about your husband and all these women and kids with different dads? Were these different women cheating on him and getting pregnant and then he adopted all those kids? By the younger of the sets of kids being adopted, except the youngest it's how it seems.

Sorry, but that would be a huge red flag.










parisonmom
by Member on Oct. 7, 2012 at 2:58 AM
That's not what I ment.....


Quoting AmyB118:

Wow....Where's my white flag?  Shit.....it's here somewhere.....

Good luck with all that....You love him and his children so much that sometimes you have to vent before you fly into a violent rage?  Being so pissed at someone that you want to act out violently (not sure WHICH one of them you want to hurt but whatever) is a fixable problem?  Sounds like a regular party at your house on the daily.  Have a good one.


Quoting parisonmom:

Ok?!? So your saying because YOU wouldn't mean what? Its the point that it don't matter about HIS past. Only the present and future.



I knew what I was getting into before I married him. BUt I didn't see the mess because I don't think of a mess I think of a family that need structure. Dh is my husband and his kids are apart of our lifes.





Quoting AmyB118:

Noooo.....I'm smart enough to have NOT gotten close to that trainwreck in the first place.  He'd never have made it past a cup of coffee, so there'd be no chance for me to "love" him.....

Age makes one notice the signs long before they open their mouths....yeah, you'll learn that one day....



Quoting parisonmom:

Whatever! As long as that is what you would do because you don't care. Well I love dh and I wouldn't run because of the mess.








Quoting AmyB118:

Hell...ALL that should be a red flag.  NO way in hell I'd get involved in that mess.  I seem to remember your being told to run like hell b/c you are too young to have to deal w/that cluster fuck.  

MOST women closer to your DH's age would see the crazy in it and have turned around and headed for the hills immediately.  You have fun w/that....it's only going to get better.  




Quoting parisonmom:

When dh met his first wife, she ran away with his dd. Whe. Dh found his dd his ex had another child so he let that child call him dad. With his other wife, she was 8 months pregnant when dh and her met, so dh adopted that child, with his other wife, she had a 7 year old child when she met dh so he adopted her too.







Its not a red flag, its life.











Quoting newwife1:

I have no idea what you mean about your husband and all these women and kids with different dads? Were these different women cheating on him and getting pregnant and then he adopted all those kids? By the younger of the sets of kids being adopted, except the youngest it's how it seems.

Sorry, but that would be a huge red flag.














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Amy1973Potts
by on Oct. 7, 2012 at 4:43 AM
I cannot read a post with gramnar this bad.
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WifeyC
by Platinum Member on Oct. 7, 2012 at 7:24 AM
1 mom liked this
What was your childhood like? Seems like you are latching onto this cluster fuck determined to fix it for a reason.
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chanizen
by Platinum Member on Oct. 7, 2012 at 8:37 AM
3 moms liked this
*sigh*. People are telling you to leave for good reason, parison. Vent all you want but do you walk into a room with your family and expect you to treat you like a newly met person every. Single. Time.

Are you all there? You lived in a home so awful you lost your kids to cps. The skids are disrepectful because you are young and haven't really earned their respect and it doesn't sound like dh backs you up. He calls you fat and lazy. You talk about leaving him quite a lot and how you don't even like him. You seem to be looking for ways to punish everyone around you.

Me, I would've questioning the whole situation. And I think you need some serious help IRL. Especially if you have a violent rage.

We see you over time. I see your posts. I remember you. I think you are in trouble.
whatIknownow
by Emerald Member on Oct. 7, 2012 at 8:42 AM
3 moms liked this

you have posted in the past about being resentful of SD because everyone else in the family is on some form of public assistance except her,so she is not pulling her own weight.

You posted not to long about about how angy you were because she was eating your potato chips and your DH had bought them for you, not her.

You had your kids taken away by CPS because of the unlivable conditions in your home. Your primary concern should be getting some job skills and getting a job so you can get out of poverty. 

And, you STILL put yourself on the 11yo's level. Your issues run very, very deep. You need to take control of your life. SD doing her chores is the very LEAST of your problems. Focus on the much larger problems. SD is not your problem. Where do you want to be in 5 years?

MomTiara19
by on Oct. 7, 2012 at 8:54 AM
1 mom liked this

Hi,

You sound very happy and I understand you both are in love.

I am 45 and I have a son almost 21.As a mom I  couldn't imagine being intimate with someone around my sons age(probably visa versa as well lol).

My step dad is 63 and he is dating a 30 year old woman.It really bothers me because he is dating someone younger than me.Not out of jealousy but awkwardness.She is a gem....but young??Would I call her step mom when she is 15 years younger than me!!

This to me is so creepy.My step dad to me has taken on this ominous image of a pedophile.I know she is a woman but how he could not realize he was like 33 when she was born?!?!

~Tia

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