I am a "newbie" to all of this and have never really blogged or joined an online group before. That being said I joined Cafe Mom because I am a divorced parent to two older teen girls (19 and 17 year olds) plus I am the step-mama to a 5 year old.
My husband is honestly the greatest man in the world! He looks like The Rock (for those who do not know who he is Google/Bing Dwayne Johnson) and sounds like Vin Diesel. Not only is he supah sexy but he is an AMAZING husband and even more AMAZING daddy!
Now here comes the yucky part that bursts our cute bubble....The ex-wife.
I have never met a more controlling, manipulative, deceitful and bitter person EVER in my 30*something years!
She despises me for a multitude of reasons that honestly are all her own issues.
My ex-husband and I are friends (we even lived together after our divorce). My ex is remarried and even though she and my younger child do not always see eye to eye (I mean who really can with a teenager? LOL) She is a good, respectable person and I value her being in our daughters lives.
This is SO NOT THE CASE with my hubby's ex.
Truth be told; even though my hubby is 6' 8", the BM mentally and emotionally abused him on a regular basis when they were married and tried to continue this behavior throughout the divorce and to this day.
She undermines and contradicts EVERYTHING he says and does plus, she always belittles and bullies him. Everything is a "competition" with her to and through their daughter. I believe, firmly, that she has behavior mental disorder and she was extremely overweight (she's lost some but is still heavy). Now I know your probably thinking I am being petty about that BUT the issue with the weight was she made my husband feel like it was ALL his fault for her being obese ( I am also NOT knocking anyone for being overweight btw) and also for everything that was wrong in her life!!! Hello take accountability for your life!
She told anyone who would listen that my DH was a monster which is the furthest thing from the truth! He is a loving, caring and compassionate man who helps anyone and makes a friend wherever he goes.
He sumed it up the best about their marriage and why it didnt work; when you are constantly fighting with someone and you are always made to be wrong or argumentative when you voiced your opinion, you def do not want to kiss & cuddle! She pushed him away because she was miserable with her own self. In the process she felt she was entitled to take their daughter too!
My DH and SD have an adorable bond and my DH fought hard to make sure he had joint legal and physical custody of his little girl. He has always been a HUGE part of his little girls' life.
Until recently we used to have my SD 2 weeks every month until she started school (we live several states apart) and bow its eow and holidays. It's cruel and unfair. It is also because BM is extremely selfish- SHE had to be happy and moved 5-6 hours away and back in with her parents. The household my SD lives in with her mom has 4 generations under one roof- sounds cute right? Nope- it's ridiculous because my SD sees her mom being raised as well and doesn't know WHO the parent is in that household! Unlike our home where it is my DH and I and we are the parents. My SD talks to her mom like they are equal and she is only 5!
What's worse my SD's meltdowns that occur EVERY SINGLE TIME my SD has to leave us! She sobs and wails and it breaks our hearts to no end yet her mom just stands there and smiles!!!!!
My SD and I have a wonderful relationship and she absolutely adores me (as I do her too!) and I swear I just do not get why this "woman" does the things she does to her own daughter! I do not believe I am better than anyone but I sure as hello kitty would NEVER use my children as a weapon or see them as a possession! I thank God everyday that my ex-hubby and I never put our kids through that!
Believe me it was not perfect or we wouldn't be divorced but we never, ever used our children as she has and I am not being biased here- My hubby, being the wonderful person he is, ALWAYS has his daughters best interest in mind! He, even though myself and others have suggested it numerous times, he could NEVER take their daughter away from the BM.....He would never want to hurt his daughter like how her mom has done.
Yet that poor little girl hurts everyday without her dad!!
Sorry to have ranted so long but damn it makes me so angry and you would think she would count her blessings and be happy but gawd is she a miserable person!
I guess it's true- you don't know what you've got until it's gone!