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 And, I'm not just talking about time logged into CM.

It seems as though the women who have had the most time logged in as a SM have been the women most targeted as Bullies, mean people, bitter.

Do some not realize that we have already lived through it?

Do you still wipe your ass with the wisdom of what other women have to tell you?

Do you think you are so unique that your story just doesnt apply?

Well, you are wrong. Some things are universal. They are repetitive.

So.....if you cant realize it, we hear your stories.......we can.

Why make mistakes if you dont have to?

 

by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 1:21 PM
Replies (21-30):
baparrot2
by Platinum Member on Nov. 15, 2012 at 2:29 PM
1 mom liked this

 Had CM been here while *I* was struggling...hell yeah I would have listened. I was dying for help.

Quoting SassyMom25:

So my thoughts are that if all the 'old timers' had been given the advice they give now, would they have listened? We're human and a good majority of us have to learn from experience. 

 

Older and wiser voices can always help you find the right path, if only you are willing to listen. - Jimmy Buffet
SammyJK
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 2:32 PM
E, how old are you?

Quoting E_is_4_Ethan:

 Well fuck me. I would have never guessed. That's awesome!


BTW...I picture a young women with long Burnett hair. Hazel eyes. Around 5'6. LOL


Quoting pdxmum:


Yes I am!  Love most parts of being 50.  Not liking the migraine issue.  That's it.


Quoting E_is_4_Ethan:


 Get out of town! You're not 50.


Quoting pdxmum:


I must be so wise I resemble the Buddha, Jesus and Einstein all wrapped up in one hot old lady.


I'm 50.  Mom for 19 years.  SM for 4 years.


And please take this in a loving way, because you do seem wise, but you are a baby.  It is all relative though, isn't it?  You have grown in your journey.  I wasn't even a mom at 29. 


But one thing is the same, if you had talked to me 4 years ago, I would have been a focused out blaming angry hurt SM.  


 


 

Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
baparrot2
by Platinum Member on Nov. 15, 2012 at 2:33 PM

 age is extremely relevant here.

SammyJK
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 2:35 PM
Im not arguing that.

Quoting baparrot2:

 age is extremely relevant here.

Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
baparrot2
by Platinum Member on Nov. 15, 2012 at 2:36 PM

 you'll see. I promise.

Quoting SammyJK:

Im not arguing that.

Quoting baparrot2:

 age is extremely relevant here.

 

SammyJK
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 2:42 PM
What?? Im seriously not arguin!

Quoting baparrot2:

 you'll see. I promise.


Quoting SammyJK:

Im not arguing that.


Quoting baparrot2:


 age is extremely relevant here.


 

Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
liltigersmom
by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 2:43 PM
Honestly I've learned alot from those. Who have btdt, admitted insecurities, troubles etc. But now those are things of the past.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
baparrot2
by Platinum Member on Nov. 15, 2012 at 2:48 PM

I would have totally argued it. I'm hard-headed like that though.............

I'd be all like, " YO, bitch, you dont know me!" 

But you know what? It's all very general in the end. Trust me. 

Quoting SammyJK:

What?? Im seriously not arguin!

Quoting baparrot2:

 you'll see. I promise.


Quoting SammyJK:

Im not arguing that.


Quoting baparrot2:


 age is extremely relevant here.


 

 

Nature_girl
by Member on Nov. 15, 2012 at 2:49 PM
8 moms liked this

 The answer you are looking for is : people have a hard time taking "advice" when they feel they are under attack. Some times people are so far from where they want to be and were they should be that they need a 12 step plan to get them there. When you just tell them, you are wrong this is how it is; they already know that! They want someone to listen to them, tell them it is alright, and then help them take steps to a better life, relationship - whatever.

I know I am not a regular poster on here- I read a lot of what is posted however- and this is just MY 2 cents from a on-lookers, bm, and sm perspective.

If you truly are here to help other step-moms, you are doing it wrong. Not because you are necessarily  wrong, but you have the wrong approach.

One more thing on age: Yes age can be relevant. But it can also be deceptive. I would rather get advice from someone younger than me that has more experience then me a certain area of life then someone who has never lived it. Our experiences make us wiser. If someone has had a "blessed" life what they say is from their wonderful experience and they can't fathom someone who has had it rough. I want my advice from someone who life tried to kick the shit out of them and they rised above it.

feliciasmith
by Bronze Member on Nov. 15, 2012 at 2:52 PM
2 moms liked this
Haha I'm only 21 :/ bm calls me the baby

But I think the advice is great here, it's harsh but usually has a good point. However, I think the more experienced sm's would like for the younger or newer ones to grow out of being a new sm faster then they did.
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