I am so glad this is a place to vent. Sometimes i feel as if I have no one to turn to. I don't know anyone in a situation like mine and DH and myself seem to keep it between us. I know of no one else to turn to and honestly, so happy I found ladies online that can possibly either give advice or at the very least understand.
Here is the issue...
Since the beginning, BM has just been plain nasty. Not only to myself or DH...I suppose that is to be expected. She got kicked out of DH house because of her filth and cheating. Ok whatever, that's on her but I wasn't around then. At that time, I actually defended her to him. She was young and had a 1YO and maybe she just wasn't ready. Throughout the years, she has started fights over the phone, kept SS without any visitation or knowledge of his whereabouts for 6 weeks, brought SS over FILTHY and infected with scabies, and when he was 2, his front 4 teeth had rotted out and had to be pulled because she REFUSED to brush his teeth and put him to bed every night with a bottle in his mouth.
Now the last year she has met a new BF and she started to straighten up a bit. She still causes arguments and we are trying to deal with it but SS4 is at least clean. SS4 is not peeing in the bed at night (he has been potty trained for over a year now) and this morning he peed on the floor. I thought that because BM is pregnant, he was doing the whole reverting thing because of the upcoming baby. I tried to talk to him and tell him that everyone loves him as the big brother. I wanted him to feel a bit extra special instead of punishing him. He told us this morning that he doesn't do it a BM's house because he sleeps in the bed with BM...and BF. Now we have dismissed the sexual aggression this year as him being a boy. But he tells us that he takes showers with BF and now they all sleep together AND she is pregnant?
Am I totally overreacting with being completely discusted and concerned with SS4 well- being? Is this a completely normal sitch? Do all 4 year olds masterbate and try to grab at breasts? Would you let a BF shower nude with your son? Is imitating sex normal for a 4 year old?