Hello, I'm new to this and was hoping for some opinions.
I have a 5 year old stepson and I have been living with his dad for a year and a half. We have been married since February. Custody is 50-50 with the week split up 3/4 days alternating. I get along very well with my ss, he listens to me better then he does with either of his parents most days.
The problem is that I am currently unemployed (furiously looking for work), so I am the go-to babysitter. With the current schedule, I watch him after school Thursday and Friday. Grandmother does Monday, Tuesday, birthmom has Wednesday. My husband is in school all day, so cannot pick up SS from school.
So, whenever grandmother or bm can not watch ss on their days, it automatically falls on me. For example, 1-2x a months the bm says she has to work Wednesdays. My husband will ask his mother, but mil often has church-stuff on Wednesdays, or work. So it is my problem. This coming week ss is out of school, and husband told me mil is working. I told him that Monday is bm's problem, as she has ss that day. Of course, she is working, and I am not, so I must watch him.
Am I being a jerk for causing an argument with my husband over this? I've brought it up several times that I think bm should be responsible for ss on the days she has him. That includes before and after school care, and holidays. She currently has nothing to do with arranging plans for him when she is at work. We pay for daycare for 2 mornings a week that she has him, I watch him the other mornings before school (He starts at 11:00am).
My main problem here is that she doesn't take responsibility enough, even though custody is 50-50. We pay for everything, she refuses to even add him to her health insurance. She has nothing to do with his homework, the list goes on and on. Help!