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BM and SD moved out piano in our absence without informing

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New drama on the SD front. My parents, DH and I were out on a road trip over the holidays. When we return we see the piano missing!!! SD has keys to our house - she and her mother came by in our absence and picked it up - without notice, without informing us, without a clue!! Yes yes yes I know this is her house too - but don't we tell each other when remove something from the house?? When I asked DH, he simply shrugged and said, it is her piano too. I was like the nerve of that little girl to bring her mother in when we were away (plus some other folks too - it is a heavy piece) and remove something from here without as much as a peep. WTF. This is sheer disrespect and humiliating behavior. AND my DH defends her (SD) when I say I didnt want SD and BM hanging around, going through my things, I don't even know what else has gone missing!!

I feel my personal space is being violated. This is the same SD who has stolen from me before. I am worried about identity theft among other things. I also think that when DH gives SD (who is a minor) keys to our house (a matter where I was not even consulted) - he has to make her accountable. 

It is very obvious that SD and BM are hell bent on seeing the end of my marriage with DH - there seems a new drama at my doorstep evey waking day. Sad part is - DH and I are not on the same side in this. 

I was like how on earth am I supposed to be comfortable with people hanging in my house without our knowledge, removing something like a piano!!? DH has not even bothered to call SD up to confirm that she indeed picked it up, even when my parents very politely asked if he should. I have half the mind of calling the cops on this - saying its a break in!! 

What should I do? (I am AGHAST - to say the least - with DH's atitude and my parents are stunned with what I am having to put up with). This time I want a solid legal solution to this. I have had about enough. 

by on Nov. 26, 2012 at 2:53 PM
Replies (31-40):
rebeccasmly
by on Nov. 26, 2012 at 4:48 PM

Since you also paid for it, I would cinsult with the police. To me that is theft. It was not her possession, it was yours and yours husband's. I say consult with them though because I do not know if you can do anything legally about it since it was both yours and your husband's.

lovemyfriend
by Bronze Member on Nov. 26, 2012 at 5:00 PM

without reading the replies...all I know is if someone, even my dad, came into my house and took my piano without even mentioning it...i'd cry.  And...i'm with you on BM in your house without you there.  I don't get why your dh doesn't seem to be bothered at all. 

packermomof2
by on Nov. 26, 2012 at 5:02 PM

What legal solutions?  Your husband said it was fine that his kid took the piano.  By all means, call the cops on her and you'll probably see the demise of your marriage because of you, not because of the piano being gone.

DDDaysh
by on Nov. 26, 2012 at 5:25 PM
2 moms liked this

 I wouldn't want alot of people going through my home when I'm not there either. 

BUT - your husband is fine with it.  He's essentially given blanket permission.  If you choose to live with a roomate (or husband) who basically opens the door to people you don't want having free access to your home, then you have to live with the consequences. 

Your husband has made it clear he will not change.  He would likely tell the police he gave his daughter the piano, and if she has a key it isn't breaking and entering.  There's little point in going to the authorities. 

You've come to an impass.  You either have to accept the way your DH chooses to order his life, and thus yours, or you have to realize you can't have your husband. 

sidelinesally
by on Nov. 26, 2012 at 5:25 PM

I'd be more pissed at SD inviting BM into my house than with a missing piano. This whole story sounds a bit strange though. She's been allowed to take it before but this time it's an issue because you weren't there for her to ask permission. And you really don't even know if she took it and DH doesn't even really seem to care that there were potentially strangers in your house because he hasn't even called to find out who really has it. BM's name is on the receipt so technically it's BM's piano unless DH can actually show a paper trail of his bank transfer being directly linked to that piano. He'd die in small claims court. Maybe you could get BM for tresspassing! Kidding. Anyway, I'd worry about the bigger problem, which is your marriage and the apparent pecking order in your house and would lean toward natural consequenes - SD no longer has a piano to play at your house while she is there. Unless you're hell bent on playing it, let her keep it at BM's and don't allow it to come back. DH will have gifted his daughter a piano, SD will have to live with the consequences of her actions and BM will have to live with two pianos in her living room.

jlg12678
by Gold Member on Nov. 26, 2012 at 5:26 PM
4 moms liked this

Oh hell no.

Your dh is lucky he is not dealing with me because he would be in for a world of hurt. Is he a complete moron?!

I would demand (yes, demand) that the piano be returned. If not, I would inform your dh that you will be calling the police to report a theft and will be pressing.  Locks would be changed, with or without him. Sd would NOT be getting a key as she and bm apparently feel your furniture is open range to them.

I really have no words. I play the piano and have since I was five. I would flip the fuck out (pardon my french) if this happened to me.

And your husband....seriously.  What happens when bm wants new living room furniture? Will it be ok when they go shopping in your living room?

sandeeyo
by Le Bonjour Chat on Nov. 26, 2012 at 5:36 PM
1 mom liked this

Time to confiscate SD's housekeys.

sandeeyo
by Le Bonjour Chat on Nov. 26, 2012 at 5:38 PM
2 moms liked this

I'm a piano player too.  All that below AND a bag of chips.  Not kosher.  I would change the locks too and SD would not be getting a key.

Quoting jlg12678:

Oh hell no.

Your dh is lucky he is not dealing with me because he would be in for a world of hurt. Is he a complete moron?!

I would demand (yes, demand) that the piano be returned. If not, I would inform your dh that you will be calling the police to report a theft and will be pressing.  Locks would be changed, with or without him. Sd would NOT be getting a key as she and bm apparently feel your furniture is open range to them.

I really have no words. I play the piano and have since I was five. I would flip the fuck out (pardon my french) if this happened to me.

And your husband....seriously.  What happens when bm wants new living room furniture? Will it be ok when they go shopping in your living room?


jessiesluv
by on Nov. 26, 2012 at 5:43 PM
1 mom liked this

Why spend time on here making a post and not calling or even going by BM's to see if the piano is there? Why get worked up over bm if you don't know?

I would have called them first. If they said they didn't have it, I would call the police. Even if they did take it, I would tell them to bring it back or call the police to get it.

Dh needs to get his head out of his behind.

KnowItAll
by Silver Member on Nov. 26, 2012 at 5:56 PM
Your problem is with your dh, not sd or BM.
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