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BM and SD moved out piano in our absence without informing

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New drama on the SD front. My parents, DH and I were out on a road trip over the holidays. When we return we see the piano missing!!! SD has keys to our house - she and her mother came by in our absence and picked it up - without notice, without informing us, without a clue!! Yes yes yes I know this is her house too - but don't we tell each other when remove something from the house?? When I asked DH, he simply shrugged and said, it is her piano too. I was like the nerve of that little girl to bring her mother in when we were away (plus some other folks too - it is a heavy piece) and remove something from here without as much as a peep. WTF. This is sheer disrespect and humiliating behavior. AND my DH defends her (SD) when I say I didnt want SD and BM hanging around, going through my things, I don't even know what else has gone missing!!

I feel my personal space is being violated. This is the same SD who has stolen from me before. I am worried about identity theft among other things. I also think that when DH gives SD (who is a minor) keys to our house (a matter where I was not even consulted) - he has to make her accountable. 

It is very obvious that SD and BM are hell bent on seeing the end of my marriage with DH - there seems a new drama at my doorstep evey waking day. Sad part is - DH and I are not on the same side in this. 

I was like how on earth am I supposed to be comfortable with people hanging in my house without our knowledge, removing something like a piano!!? DH has not even bothered to call SD up to confirm that she indeed picked it up, even when my parents very politely asked if he should. I have half the mind of calling the cops on this - saying its a break in!! 

What should I do? (I am AGHAST - to say the least - with DH's atitude and my parents are stunned with what I am having to put up with). This time I want a solid legal solution to this. I have had about enough. 

by on Nov. 26, 2012 at 2:53 PM
Replies (51-60):
jamamama00
by on Nov. 26, 2012 at 8:39 PM

Oh, come on! She's THIRTEEN.

Quoting Chiu:

Does the law allow SD to come to our place in our absence and take our things? 


AmyB118
by NA Rocks on Nov. 26, 2012 at 8:56 PM
3 moms liked this


Quoting YesImMomToo:

Quite honestly.. the problem isn't BM or SD it is your husband. It is his failure to make and maintain boundaries, to respect your wishes, to have control of his household, or respect your place and boundaries with in that home. 

Personally I couldn't be with a man who had no balls...

It would be a cold day in hell before the skids had free reign of our house while we were away and BM would never be allowed in our home. ever. In fact she has been trespassed from our property so if she'd like to try that she'd end up with a nice ride to the police station.

I would call the police and report a theft and pack some suitcases while I was waiting for them to arrive. I think they all need a come to Jesus talk.

WORD!!!!!  DH problem all the way.  Let me tell you, if I came home and my piano was missing (hypothetical piano although I'd LOVE to have one) and BM and SSs took it there would be HELL. TO. PAY!!  DH knows this.....If he didn't retrieve my piano post  haste, he'd have to run around the front yard picking his shit up as I flung it out the door - maybe BM would have a spare room to put his sorry ass in.....right next to the piano.

Sounds like you need to draw a line in the sand and have the Come To Jesus talk w/him.......on the way to get the piano :)

lovemyfriend
by Bronze Member on Nov. 26, 2012 at 9:04 PM
1 mom liked this

I don't think thats the point.  I would be upset if ANYONE, no matter who it was, came into my house while i was away without at LEAST letting me know.  Even if it was my kid, I'd expect a "hey I was over at your house and i borrowed the piano" or whatever.  I don't think this kind of situation is a "drop it" kind of thing.  I think its highly disrespectful.  I know my dad would NOT appreciate it, let alone my step mom.  Thats like saying "oh, you didn't wear those pearls that BM and SD came into your house and took from you anyway...get over it".  Pianos can be VERY pricey.  The one in my home is worth 10,000.  If someone took that you bet I wouldn't drop it.  Even my moms Keyboard cost in the thousands. 

Quoting jamamama00:

The police aren't going to do anything....unless your husband presses charges...which he isn't going to do to his kid! Nothing would come of it anyway as she is a minor. Just drop it. Did you really play the piano that much?


Derdriu
by Gold Member on Nov. 26, 2012 at 9:56 PM
1 mom liked this
If SD is underage, you file theft charges against BM.

Isn't this the same kid who steals food and other items for her mother? The one who lied her way into obtaining a plane ticket from Asia while on a trip with your DH? I could have you mistaken for a different poster, but if not, the missing piano should be one more hint pointing you to a divorce lawyer. If I recall correctly, your own family is already telling you to leave...
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sandeeyo
by Le Bonjour Chat on Nov. 26, 2012 at 10:19 PM


Quoting Derdriu:

If SD is underage, you file theft charges against BM.

Isn't this the same kid who steals food and other items for her mother? The one who lied her way into obtaining a plane ticket from Asia while on a trip with your DH? I could have you mistaken for a different poster, but if not, the missing piano should be one more hint pointing you to a divorce lawyer. If I recall correctly, your own family is already telling you to leave...

You have a good memory...I remember all that too!

Chiu
by on Nov. 26, 2012 at 10:26 PM

Well I am not the aggressive kind, but sometimes I almost understand mad rage. 

Charli627
by on Nov. 26, 2012 at 10:29 PM


Quoting MomGoingCrazy78:

Oh hell no! I'd call the cops and have it as a break in. They can contact SD and have it in writing/report that she came in (without permission) and took a piece of furniture. Then you can take the steps to get it back (if you want it back).

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Chiu
by on Nov. 26, 2012 at 10:30 PM

The answer to that is simple - the kind who is totally f.....d up in the first place and one who encourages this behavior!! 

Quoting jlg12678:

And what type of adult female thinks it's acceptable to just take a piano?! I don't care what the kid says; a NORMAL and respectable adult verifies something like this with the owner of the item.

I'm trying to imagine my son saying it's ok for me to take his dad's Gibson guitar and me driving him over to the house while the adults are not home to take it.

Yeah, can't imagine doing that. Period.


jlg12678
by Gold Member on Nov. 26, 2012 at 10:40 PM
Really? You must be clueless. Charges may not stick with the kid but they would for accomplice bm as one of the owners of the home is pressing charges. That's a no brainer.

Pianos are ungodly expensive. And those who play music generally like and use their expensive equipment.

I hope the op files charges. Lesson learned-don't steal.

Quoting jamamama00:

The police aren't going to do anything....unless your husband presses charges...which he isn't going to do to his kid! Nothing would come of it anyway as she is a minor. Just drop it. Did you really play the piano that much?



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jlg12678
by Gold Member on Nov. 26, 2012 at 10:41 PM
So op, what are you going to do?

I say file a police report and kick your dh in the ass. If this is allowed to continue next you'll find your refrigerator gone next time or god knows what else.
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