Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Stepmom Central Stepmom Central

How much is too much to spend at Christmas?

Posted by   + Show Post

 

I have 3 teens, one is my bio-son (19) and the other two are my step daughters (17 and 14) My question is how much (relatively speaking) do people spend on each kid at Christmas. I'm dealing with my DH's ex who wants to be the girls best friend and has already spent around $600 on each child and is still shopping.  My son was raised a bit more realistic, and only wants what he needs, some new boots and a gift card for some new clothes. Is that sad or admirable? All of us have been together for 7 years and I'm just trying to get an idea if I'm being too logical and rigid on this. These kids have lost the whole concept of money and I'm walking a fine line.  What are some of your thoughts?

mjc10

by on Dec. 7, 2012 at 7:47 AM
Replies (21-30):
rocknmom85
by Silver Member on Dec. 7, 2012 at 2:21 PM

You don't have to spend a ton to get some great things that they will love. I have only spent about $200 on each kid so far and that was like 6 presents each, with one big gift. I just look for great deals and buy most of it on Amazon or Kohls, but only if its discounted. My skids get tons of gifts, they have two sets of parents and three sets of grandparents that spoil them plus other relatives. I don't like Christmas being all about presents though, and the kids are even more excited about the festivities of Christmas then just opening presents. I am very proud of them!

roldansync
by Member on Dec. 7, 2012 at 2:26 PM

It is not the cost of things but the thought and sentiment behind the gift.  It is also not a competition with BM even if she seems to think it is. Your son sounds like my kids. My three year old asked for new slippers and a robe. Merry Christmas.

PROGENITOR
by on Dec. 7, 2012 at 3:12 PM
1 mom liked this

We spend about 300 total on our kids (our two and SS).

SSs mom will spend that on just him.

I guess it is up to the family. We aren't well off financially, but even if we were, I'm not into too much gift giving for my own children.....we'd likely do more Angel Tree gifts and adopt a family if we could afford to.

I think it is admirable and awesome that your son wants practical things....I'd be more happy to give a child like that something really super special than a child who only wants electronics or video games. Your son likely appreciates things more than greedier kids who get spoiled with thousands of dollars worth of gifts each year.

We do a lot of focus on non gift giving type of giving this time of year. Gratitude, bell ringing, family time, crafts.....that sort of thing.

sandeeyo
by Le Bonjour Chat on Dec. 7, 2012 at 3:59 PM

Hey if the skid's BM can afford to spend that much money on her kids, then more power to her.

Your son sounds very practical.  Not sad at all.

FireVixen
by Member on Dec. 7, 2012 at 4:57 PM

We spent a lil extra this year- probably around 400. But she needed a new player for our car trips so we just got her a tablet. that took up just under half of that total. Then she just got a few lil things. Were working on stopping materialistic values and replacing them with necessity and charity. Shell probably throw a fit about only getting 4 things this year,but conversations will come along with it.

sidelinesally
by on Dec. 7, 2012 at 5:17 PM

We spend about $100 per child and while we could afford more, we feel that this gives each a little something that they want as opposed to need. It could be the expensive hoodie that we wouldn't normally buy from their "clothing allowance" or the data plan for their phones...not necessities, but awesome to haves.

ManicAttack
by Silver Member on Dec. 8, 2012 at 6:30 AM

When I was growing up, each kid got the same amount of presents- not the same amount spent on them.  When we got older, my mom would buy us some small things that we wanted, like CDs, movies, games, or bath crap, then give us cash to go on our own.  My parents were broke, so it was rare for either parent to spend over $100 on each kid.  

I would just get things you KNOW they want.  Maybe give your son a gift card and tell him you want to go shopping and out to lunch with him.

Pero1
by on Dec. 8, 2012 at 9:43 AM


Quoting mjc10: 

I'm dealing with my DH's ex who wants to be the girls best friend and has already spent around $600 on each child and is still shopping. 

OMG!!! Is she spending your money???

raerae725
by Silver Member on Dec. 8, 2012 at 1:27 PM
This pretty much for us. I did do a bit more this year because i got SD some great deals from aeropostle.

Quoting sidelinesally:

We spend about $100 per child and while we could afford more, we feel that this gives each a little something that they want as opposed to need. It could be the expensive hoodie that we wouldn't normally buy from their "clothing allowance" or the data plan for their phones...not necessities, but awesome to haves.

Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
blaquechinadoll
by on Dec. 8, 2012 at 4:45 PM

My son10 knew that when I quit work to go to school full time, that cut backs would affect all of us, especially him bc he had a lot of ec's. I begin preparing him for this earlier this year. He's getting a tablet. He wants & needs one, so that's it. I buy him clothes throughout the year and several pairs of shoes at the beginning of the school year. He' s understanding, so we're good there. I know he will receive gifts from other family. 

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)