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Held my ground with BM....take care of your kid!

Posted by on Dec. 12, 2012 at 10:31 AM
  • 34 Replies

Well yesterday SD called from the school saying her throat hurt. I went there and looked at her, gave her some throat spray and cough drops. She wasn't running a fever so I told her to call me once she got to our house after school. SD called and I went and looked at her throat (DD had strep last week) and called BM to let her know what was going on. SD still wasn't running a fever, but her throat was really red with some bumps on it. I had called dr's office and they were closing early so I wasn't able to get SD in right away. They told me they had an appt for this morning. I told them that I wasn't going to make that appt (it wasn't our day with SD).

I called BM back and let her know about SD and the appts. She asked why I didn't go ahead and make the appt. I told her that it was her day, I didn't know her schedule, so she should call and make the appt. She said she didn't think SD needed to go to the dr's. I told her she was probably getting strep and needed to be sure because if she did have it, then she would need to start antibiotics right away. She asked if I could take SD to the appt, I told her no, that I had to work. I'm just getting a little sick of trying to pick up the slack from BM, so I had had enough and told her no. Felt good to be honest, take care of your kid when she's sick, God knows DH and I do so now it's your turn because it's your day. (DH has been in audit meetings at work all week, so he can't take SD this week to the dr.)

This morning I called BM to let her know that SD had started running a fever this morning and I didn't think she needed to go to school. I had already given her some medicine to help with the fever but I was going to drop SD off at BM's house. BM told me she was going to be staying home today so she'd be able to keep SD at home. Ok, great. Well I dropped SD off, BM met us at the car door, and she told SD to get into her car because she was taking her to work with her. SD looked miserable. I almost said that I'd stay home with her, but I held my tongue. Bm said she'd call me after the appointment, she had called and made one. I sure hope that she takes SD home and stays with her after the appt, that's what SD needs right now. Oh and BM can take off of work whenever she wants, so that's not an issue of she has to be at work.

I feel bad for SD. I feel guilty for not taking her and keeping her at home instead of BM taking her to work. BUT it's BM's day and she needs to take care of SD.  I'd have to take off of work today and I have a lot going on anyway.

by on Dec. 12, 2012 at 10:31 AM
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Replies (1-10):
WifeyC
by Platinum Member on Dec. 12, 2012 at 10:50 AM
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She is taking care of her kid her way. Why get upset?  If you really wanted her to take care of her child from the beginning why did you bother calling the dr at all?

MomGoingCrazy78
by Silver Member on Dec. 12, 2012 at 10:56 AM

Because yesterday was our day and if I could have gotten SD in, then I would have. At least then I would have known that SD got her first dose of medicine. BM has a HUGE history of not giving SD her antibiotics like she's supposed to. I have a feeling I'll have to go get her medicine because BM will "forget" to go to the pharmacy. Just how she works.

DH called and chewed BM out last night because she didn't want to take SD to the dr at all. He told her that SD needed to go and that if she didn't take her this morning and he found out, that he'd get our lawyer involved (big issues there with her not taking care of SD). I guess she took him seriously. She always wants us to take SD to her appts, not do it herself.

Quoting WifeyC:

She is taking care of her kid her way. Why get upset?  If you really wanted her to take care of her child from the beginning why did you bother calling the dr at all?


adamsmom0116
by on Dec. 12, 2012 at 11:06 AM

I feel bad for your SD because it doesn't sound like she's going to the dr like she needs to. BUT, she is with her mother and it sounds like her mother is aware of the situation. She might not handle it the way you would, but your SD is her kid so it is her decision. Hope your SD feels better soon!

tiredmama42
by on Dec. 12, 2012 at 11:12 AM
1 mom liked this

If my c0-worker brought her sick kid into work I would insist they go home. We dont want sick co-workers let alone sick kids in the office.

MomGoingCrazy78
by Silver Member on Dec. 12, 2012 at 11:20 AM

Kinda what I thought. BM works in a place with 60+ employees and SD was coughing and hacking away. They also don't have a place for her to lay down and rest unless it's on the floor. I can't imagine SD is comfortable there.

Quoting tiredmama42:

If my c0-worker brought her sick kid into work I would insist they go home. We dont want sick co-workers let alone sick kids in the office.


ladyk86
by on Dec. 12, 2012 at 11:20 AM

not to be mean but its not about who takes SD to the doctor, its about SD getting to the doctor. Sounds to me like you just trying to make BM look bad. I would have went ahead and taken her so that she could get the medicine she needed. Why can't people see its about the kids not about who does this and who does that. 

MomGoingCrazy78
by Silver Member on Dec. 12, 2012 at 11:30 AM
1 mom liked this

So I should be taking off of work to take SD to the dr instead of her own BM taking off of work to take her??? In the past almost 8 years, it's been me the majority of time or my DH. I had a house closing at work today and really couldn't be gone unless it was an emergency, If BM CAN take SD to the dr which there is no reason why she can't, then she needs to do it.

I'll find out in a little while if SD goes to the dr or not. If BM doesn't take her, all hell is going to break loose with my DH. SD will get to a dr one way or another. If he has to take off of work to take her, he said he's also stopping by his lawyers on his way back home. BM keeps telling him that she is the BM and she wants to do things for SD. Great, then step up and do them. That's why I stepped back today and said it's your day, you do it. It's always convenient for her to say those things, but never to actually do them.

You're right, it is about the kid. I have done a lot for SD in the almost 8 years I've been with DH. We always make sure SD is taken care of, even if it's on BM's time. BUT for once, it would be really nice for BM to practice what she preaches.

Quoting ladyk86:

not to be mean but its not about who takes SD to the doctor, its about SD getting to the doctor. Sounds to me like you just trying to make BM look bad. I would have went ahead and taken her so that she could get the medicine she needed. Why can't people see its about the kids not about who does this and who does that. 


Bluetick
by on Dec. 12, 2012 at 11:34 AM
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Stop arguing w bm and take the innocent child to the darn doctor!!! I can't BELIVE I'm even hearing this it's not your day so what ?
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ladyk86
by on Dec. 12, 2012 at 11:38 AM

i completely agree with BM practicing what she preaches. But you will learn just like I learned, BM only says that because she wants to look good in front of her kids and tells you that because she wants you to think that she can do this, but when it comes down to the nitty gritty, its going to be you or your husband that takes her. I'm sorry that ya'll have to play these childish games that BM want to play

Quoting MomGoingCrazy78:

So I should be taking off of work to take SD to the dr instead of her own BM taking off of work to take her??? In the past almost 8 years, it's been me the majority of time or my DH. I had a house closing at work today and really couldn't be gone unless it was an emergency, If BM CAN take SD to the dr which there is no reason why she can't, then she needs to do it.

I'll find out in a little while if SD goes to the dr or not. If BM doesn't take her, all hell is going to break loose with my DH. SD will get to a dr one way or another. If he has to take off of work to take her, he said he's also stopping by his lawyers on his way back home. BM keeps telling him that she is the BM and she wants to do things for SD. Great, then step up and do them. That's why I stepped back today and said it's your day, you do it. It's always convenient for her to say those things, but never to actually do them.

You're right, it is about the kid. I have done a lot for SD in the almost 8 years I've been with DH. We always make sure SD is taken care of, even if it's on BM's time. BUT for once, it would be really nice for BM to practice what she preaches.

Quoting ladyk86:

not to be mean but its not about who takes SD to the doctor, its about SD getting to the doctor. Sounds to me like you just trying to make BM look bad. I would have went ahead and taken her so that she could get the medicine she needed. Why can't people see its about the kids not about who does this and who does that. 



Amy1973Potts
by on Dec. 12, 2012 at 11:38 AM
1 mom liked this
Who the hell takes A SICK CHILD TO WORK ? Especially if they have the option to stay home?

Not in their childs best interest. Sorry. And if my coworker brought their germbag to work unecessarily (possibly streppy/highly contagious) and if I caught it, means I miss work, have a dr/rx copay, means IM KICKIN YOUR ASS....

How and why are some people so fucking STUPID?
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