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walk a mile in my shoes before you judge ;)

Posted by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 10:09 PM
  • 42 Replies
9 moms liked this
I have only been on here for a very short amount of time but i've seen alot of judgement comming from lots n lots of moms. Its sad really. we've all come here (i'm assuming) for the same type of things, support, encouragement, and just to get stories from others going thru similar situations and get opinions on how to handle things. and even tho there are lots of wonderful moms that give great support and encouragement there are also lots that just JUDGE on stuff they don't know. afterall none of us are in the EXACT SAME situation,,, EVERYONE on the face of this earth has different personalities which is what makes us individuals. why be rude and cruel and insulting? Do we want someone to act that way with us? NO. Seriously if we see a post that irritates us why not just pass by it and find one we can give encouragement on instead of just causing anger, irritation, and upset??? We're all trying to do the right thing and the best thing in the situation we're in... None of us are trying to bring chaos or heartache to our situation, we want it to be better! Thats why we're here! If we didn't care about our situations we would not be here we'd just ditch it and move on. PLEASE Ladies, show each other empathy and RESPECT just like we'd want to be shown to us.
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 10:09 PM
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Replies (1-10):
KnowItAll
by Silver Member on Jan. 14, 2013 at 10:31 PM
4 moms liked this
Because we are sooooo different, some of us don't want to give out encouragement and support all the time like you do, apparently. We like to give out real world advice. Since different is good, embrace that now. You give support, I'll give advice...and we'll all be happy.
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om1970
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 10:38 PM
Quoting KnowItAll:

Because we are sooooo different, some of us don't want to give out encouragement and support all the time like you do, apparently. We like to give out real world advice. Since different is good, embrace that now. You give support, I'll give advice...and we'll all be happy.



Lol, Good Luck
LittleMama2012
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 10:39 PM
1 mom liked this
I kind of just call it like I see it. Generally opinions or judgement is based on whatever is posted, not the whole big picture and every detail for the last however many years. I like advice as well as support. If I am just wrong, someone needs to tell me. Otherwise, I will just keep being wrong and looking stupid. If you don't like the judgements, ignore them. I ignore the ones I don't like.
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destiny83
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 10:42 PM
1 mom liked this

I'm kind of a positive, lets fugure out the real problem type of supporter myself. So I understand where youre coming from. Some members are not that way, they are straight to the point of their first thought with no buffer or gentleness. Personalities are different, so best not to get involved in a heated post if you're the sensitive type.

kate80
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 10:43 PM
Here is my supportive words of advice. Leave this group. You will never find the happy, warm and fuzzy feelings you want in here. For every nice one there is waaaaaay more who just want to tell you how bad you suck. Find a group that caters to your interests. Mom of 3 yo, women from Connecticut, etc. Just my opinion. Enjoy the ride of cm.
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om1970
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 10:56 PM
5 moms liked this
Lol i guess i hafta just sit back and laugh at some of y'all that get your pleasure out of insults. i sure hope your better moms than humans,,, yep that was an insult. i can get every bit as cruel and evil as some of y'all can but mostly just don't see the need to downgrade people since society does it enough to us all.
kmur
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 11:37 PM
6 moms liked this

i agree with you, thats why i choose my words and i rarely post on here and IF i do, i REALLY have to watch what i write because if i dont...FORGET IT, lol.....so, i pick and choose when i comment and with who and sometimes someone gets under my skin at the wrong time( im human) and i let them hv it back ...but i agree with you, theres NOTHING wrong with giving advice in a respectful way, it CAN be done but some of the posters choose not to do it that way....whatever, to each his own 

packermomof2
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 11:45 PM

No, not all of us are here for support from anonymous people.  

We can only go by what you say - don't want comments that don't sit well with you?  You'll have to think about posting on an open forum with tons of people who may or may not care that you need things sugar coated.  

Respect also means different things to different people. I wouldn't feel respected if people said things to me in a sugar coated way  - I'd think they were talking down to me. I like things straightforward and right to the point.  I don't mind when people say exactly what they're thinking either - freedom of speech is how the first amendment goes, not the freedom from being offended by what is said.  

Some people do try to be chaos. You may not, I don't...but there are people who do.

momof2ex1
by Ruby Member on Jan. 15, 2013 at 12:03 AM
It is not just here. I was judged and given some pretty harsh 'advice' that made my head spin and even made me question the last 12 years of my life from another board. And you know what I said to myself? This is what I came here for. To get my ass in gear. I was wrong. I need to fix that. I asked for advice. They only know what I'm willing to share. I think if posters would put it all out there in the beginning, they would not find themselves trying to explain and defend on and on in to page 17. The hardest thing to hear is what we don't want to hear. And usually the truth lies in the replies that make me think. The ones that hurt to read.... That is usually where my Answer is.
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Seychelles1409
by Gold Member on Jan. 15, 2013 at 12:30 AM
1 mom liked this


Well said, very insightful.  I imagine you have learned a great deal about yourself.
Quoting momof2ex1:

It is not just here. I was judged and given some pretty harsh 'advice' that made my head spin and even made me question the last 12 years of my life from another board. And you know what I said to myself? This is what I came here for. To get my ass in gear. I was wrong. I need to fix that. I asked for advice. They only know what I'm willing to share. I think if posters would put it all out there in the beginning, they would not find themselves trying to explain and defend on and on in to page 17. The hardest thing to hear is what we don't want to hear. And usually the truth lies in the replies that make me think. The ones that hurt to read.... That is usually where my Answer is.


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