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How long did it take to meet your SKs?

Posted by on Jan. 18, 2013 at 9:55 AM
  • 43 Replies

I've come across some articles on this subject. Some say, you should be divorced for a full two years and wait until you've been with your partner for one. Some say you should wait until after six months of dating a person, and some say you should wait until you start discussing marriage. So I thought I'd ask you ladies on Café Mom. 

How long did it take for you to meet your SKs? How did they react to you the first time you met them?

I met my SS (3 at the time, now almost six) about two weeks into dating DH. I'd been chatting with DH for a few months and after our first date, we spent every afternoon hanging out (except for days he had SS). I worked in a coffee shop/bookstore (where I met DH) and one morning, he brought SS into the coffee shop. He bought drinks for both of them and I ended up chatting with SS (we never said, ‘this is who I'd dating' or anything). Apparently, SS really liked me and talked about the ‘coffee girl' when they were at home. After a few weeks of dating DH, and DH and SS coming in on the weekends, we took a quick day trip out of town. SS and I hit it off almost immediately!

by on Jan. 18, 2013 at 9:55 AM
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Replies (1-10):
dbush0584
by on Jan. 18, 2013 at 9:56 AM

I knew my SKs LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG before they were my SKs.  I have known him since junior high and his ex since high school.  I used to babysit those kids.  

angelmommy2806
by on Jan. 18, 2013 at 9:57 AM
I didn't meet the skids until Dh was awarded primary custody. Bm had taken off with them and when she was found she was thrown in jail for child abuse. Dh had been together 4 years, married almost 2.
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MomGoingCrazy78
by Lindy Lou on Jan. 18, 2013 at 10:07 AM

About a month after dating DH. We had kids the same age, so they had playdates.

weaveress
by Bronze Member on Jan. 18, 2013 at 10:07 AM

i knew Sd before I knew dh. dh and i met through bm. bm and i went to high school together. she had sd her sophmore year

mestiza_07
by Member on Jan. 18, 2013 at 10:11 AM
Dh and I were dating 3 months before sd was born. She was 2 weeks old when I met her.
MamaMoopsie
by on Jan. 18, 2013 at 10:30 AM

Well, when DH and I started dating I didn't plan on meeting his daughter for a LONG time, but then on a weekend that BM was supposed to have SD, BM called my DH and said she couldn't handle SD she was just being too much energy and he had better meet her ASAP. We were on a date and his truck was in the shop so we were in my car. We'd been dating for about three weeks. That's how I met her for the first time, and I drove them home and waited while he tucked her in for the night. She didn't think too much about me because her feelings were hurt that her mom didn't want her and I don't blame her.

About two weeks later BM bailed on picked SD up again so our plans got changed again. We were supposed to go on a romantic picnic and he suggested we take SD too and I figured we could go to a park with play equipment and that'd be fine. Well, we ended up playing more with her (she was barely 5 at the time) and I started falling in love with her and she started falling in love with me. After we'd been at the park for a while she ran up and hugged me tight and said "You're just like a real mom is supposed to be!" It broke my heart and scared me to death! I tried to distance myself after that...but I was already in love with my DH at that point and was falling for his little girl, too. Five years later she's the sunshine of my life and I absolutely adore her, and he's my best friend and we're still very happy together.

FresshAir
by on Jan. 18, 2013 at 10:34 AM

It was just about 3 years.  DH and I started dating almost immediately after he split with BM.  We were engaged by the end of the first year, but BM had been withholding SD the whole time.  We decided to postpone the wedding until SD could meet and get comfortable with me, so it wouldn't feel so abrupt to her.  BM fought it tooth and nail, but after about 3 years of fighting, we finally were able to get SD back into her dad's life, introduce her to me, get her to a comfort level and set the date. 

WifeyC
by Platinum Member on Jan. 18, 2013 at 10:35 AM

Same day as DH.  I actually officially met SS12 before DH and SS15

RMCmata
by on Jan. 18, 2013 at 11:57 AM
About 3 weeks. Dh has had lots of issues with past relationships and ss. He wanted to see how ss and I would get along before we got too serious. But I wasn't introduced as a gf.
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Lorena
by Bronze Member on Jan. 18, 2013 at 12:05 PM
I knew my skids as soon as they were born! But bm took off with them. It took almost 4 yrs to find them so by the time they met me it was only a couple of Weeks before our first anniversary.
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