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If you recieve child support how do u spend it?

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I have 3 kids that are not my husbands and i get child support for them and he also has 2 other children that are not mine and then we have one together. he feels like i should use my child support for everyone, including buying him stuff and paying the bills. we always fight about it cause i feel like i should just be spending it onthe 3 kids that its for and he just sees it completly differently from me. i feel like its for my kids, its not new husband and stepkid support its child support for my 3 children. do u spend your child support on your stepkids and husband?

by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 3:00 PM
Replies (31-40):
PumpkinSpice8
by Silver Member on Jan. 31, 2013 at 4:20 PM
CS is put into the bank account with every other check. Basically just added to the budget. LO has everything she needs and our bills are paid every month. There is no this is for this, this, and this... And that is for that, that, and that. If we need something we buy it.
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KellyReedy
by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 4:20 PM

BM NEVER EVER gave us a dime the 5 years we had them.  She got $200 every Friday when she had them, plus clothes and things they needed.  BECAUSE, she used it for new clothes for HER and Weekend getaways when they were at our house!


whatIknownow
by Emerald Member on Jan. 31, 2013 at 4:36 PM



Quoting PumpkinSpice8:

CS is put into the bank account with every other check. Basically just added to the budget. LO has everything she needs and our bills are paid every month. There is no this is for this, this, and this... And that is for that, that, and that. If we need something we buy it.


that's the thing, how can you say I paid the light bill with CS money but I bought my plane tickets to Aruba with that other money. It's all one pot. Even if you have separate accounts, it's still all one pot.

mommy2annaliese
by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 4:39 PM
Supporting the child. Paying rent so the child has a roof to live under, paying the electrical so the house is in livable condition (heat, air) buying the child food, buying the child clothes and essentials, paying for half of the child's medicines or doctor visits, that kind of thing.
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PumpkinSpice8
by Silver Member on Jan. 31, 2013 at 4:44 PM
You're right. And I like the way you said its all one pot.


Quoting whatIknownow:




Quoting PumpkinSpice8:

CS is put into the bank account with every other check. Basically just added to the budget. LO has everything she needs and our bills are paid every month. There is no this is for this, this, and this... And that is for that, that, and that. If we need something we buy it.



that's the thing, how can you say I paid the light bill with CS money but I bought my plane tickets to Aruba with that other money. It's all one pot. Even if you have separate accounts, it's still all one pot.


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whatIknownow
by Emerald Member on Jan. 31, 2013 at 4:46 PM
1 mom liked this

I'll tell you one thing... my DD21 is fixin to graduate from college in May, and then CS for her stops!

WAAAAHHHHH. My ex (well, his wife really) pays $850 per month in CS for our two kids (DD21 and DS19), and now I guess it will be cut in half.

UGH. Good thing I'm getting that trip to Aruba in before the gravy train dries up!

momof2ex1
by Ruby Member on Jan. 31, 2013 at 4:54 PM
Child support is in my name. It is direct deposited in to my account. It was court ordered, payable to ME. I use it how I see fit. I think of it as reimbursement for the previous month. Since I was supporting my daughter financially on my own for the months leading up to the divorce and child support hearing, it is reimbursing me for monies already paid. It ends the month after she turns 18. It's not like rent that is due on the 1st. You pay on the 1st for the month of February. It comes in halves and honestly, I don't even get the full amount that is ordered. I am ordered $900/month. It is not ordered $10,800/year. However, the state takes in to consideration pay periods so since ex is paid bi- weekly, he makes bi-weekly payments, 26 times per year, which lowers the monthly amount I receive except for twice a year when he gets paid 3 times in a month. So theoretically, the CS is almost $70 short per month.

CS comes in when it comes in. It is never the same day and never can be counted on. Many times it has not been sent and payments have not been 'made' up when missed. Like if I missed my mortgage payment, I would still owe that money and I quite possibly would have bill collectors calling me for the past due amount that I 'skipped'. Unfortunately it does not work that way.

I use CS as I see fit. It all goes in to one bucket and comes out the same. I do take a small % each month and put it in to a savings account for my daughter. It will more than likely be a college fund or even a car fund one day. My husband and I combine our finances and while we do not calculate CS as income in our budget, we do use it. We use it wherever it falls. If all my bills are paid and then CS comes in, CS might pay for Ds daycare or it might pay for DD to buy a book at the book fair. Or it might buy a gift for a birthday party. It is reimbursing me for what I've already paid to provide for our child. Quite honestly, CS usually ends up being 'fun' money for the family because the bills get paid regardless of whether it comes in or not. The child has already been provided for, so now we get to use the 'extra' money for something fun. There were lots of times my husband paid for my daughter to go to the doctor or to take dance or whatever so I don't have a problem at all in combining the CS with our household monies.
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momof2ex1
by Ruby Member on Jan. 31, 2013 at 4:58 PM
Bahahahahaa!! Right??


Quoting whatIknownow:

I'll tell you one thing... my DD21 is fixin to graduate from college in May, and then CS for her stops!

WAAAAHHHHH. My ex (well, his wife really) pays $850 per month in CS for our two kids (DD21 and DS19), and now I guess it will be cut in half.

UGH. Good thing I'm getting that trip to Aruba in before the gravy train dries up!


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momof2ex1
by Ruby Member on Jan. 31, 2013 at 5:08 PM
Exactly!!

My husband is the bread winner so he foots more of the bill than ex dh or I foot for dd but really, this is what he wanted. He doesn't want me to work another job to make more money. He really wants me to be a SAHM and to have another baby. However I love my job and do not want to be at home. I like being out in the working world. But he would much rather I be home and he knows that he would be footing the bill for all of us if I stayed home.

Let's say, if I get $100 a week in pay. $100 a week in CS. I have $200 in my bank account. I go to the store and buy groceries and toilet paper, shampoo and Lysol; I spend $150. How will I know how much toilet paper dd is going to use for me to divide it out? And how will I know who's money paid for the shampoo?


Quoting viv212:

I am actually really tempted to buy things I shouldn't with my CS this month. I'm not going to lie. I justify it because I went 11 years with no CS so this money I can use on me.



OP- I usually only spend it on my dd but I do ocassionally use the money for the house to keep functioning. I think not using to buy groceries is a little selfish if you need to put food on the table but at the same time, don't let it become a habit to only spend it on bills. Then when your kids need something, where is the money going to come from? Your husband?

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packermomof2
by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 5:10 PM

The money goes into my account and mingles with the money I put in there from my paycheck.  I don't know which money is paying for what.  If I got out to dinner with my family, buy a birthday present, or pay bills it's all in one pot. 

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