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mother’s day (and other holiday) cards

Posted by on Feb. 10, 2013 at 10:59 AM
  • 23 Replies

Just to get this out there, this post is not Mother’s Day specific – it’s about holiday cards in general.

 

With Valentine’s Day fast approaching, I’ve been thinking about holiday cards. Easter, Mother’s Day, May Day (when I was little we left baskets of flowers on family members porches), Father’s Day, etc.

 

My questions for you guys are – what do you do regarding holiday (Mother’s Day, Valentine’s Day, Christmas, ect) cards? Do you make cards for BM and her family? Does BM have the kids make cards for you? Do your SK give you the cards they make at school? Do they have the option to make multiple cards for multiple parents at school? Do you think holiday cards are important or have any significance? What would you do if your SK refused to give a card to BM and wanted to give it to you instead (in this case, a Mother's Day card)?

by on Feb. 10, 2013 at 10:59 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Tigress22304
by Platinum Member on Feb. 10, 2013 at 11:42 AM

BM doesn't celebrate Valentine's Day. SO we dont exchange anything with her. or her kids.

The skids dont give us cards. We always buy them little gifts/candy.


lnr187
by on Feb. 10, 2013 at 11:54 AM

 we don't do anything for bm side of the family. on occasion ss will draw a pic for bm or his 'sissy' (on bm's side). he has never had the option to make cards for multiple parents at school, or if he did, he opted not to. in regards to mother's day, he chooses to give them to me. however, i'd keep them anyways because they're with the rest of his school projects. bm doesn't keep any of that stuff. i used to send a few projects to bm but she didn't keep them so i stopped. she has never asked.

mamaBerg85
by Silver Member on Feb. 10, 2013 at 3:24 PM
Sd always has the option to make one or both of us cards. Oinf that they did a mother's day tea at school they filled out silly little things about us and the teacher read them out loud. I asked sd afterwards where bms was and the teacher said ill give u a blank one because sd said only one mommy is coming and refused to do one even when I offered to help her. It was pretty sad this was early on in mine and dh relationship when I was still getting used to the idea of raising sd and how to do it.
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EmBoogRaysMommy
by on Feb. 10, 2013 at 4:30 PM

I am going to have DS make a Mothers Day card for his bio mom this year. He usually gives me the mothers day gifts that he makes at school. BM has been back in the picture for about a month now so I'm not sure if he will want to give those gifts to her this year. Honestly I would be hurt if he didn't want to give me his special gift but I would never say anything to him about it. He should be able to give his gift to who ever he wants to IMO. Before BM left he gave me the mothers day card that he made at school. I had him make a special card for her (or maybe we bought one. I can't remember now) and he gave it to her on Mother's Day. 

dfaley1066
by on Feb. 10, 2013 at 8:21 PM
It depends on your relationship with the BM I think. My first marriage I got along with the BM and we would exchange cards and gifts for Christmas and Mother's Day. My husband and I don't get along with the BM so we don't exchange.
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kappalopokis
by Member on Feb. 10, 2013 at 11:04 PM
I usually let the kids take the lead on that one, and support them 100% in whoever they want to give cards/gifts to. I help, but let them decide.

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Birdseed
by Gold Member on Feb. 11, 2013 at 1:46 AM

We take the kids shopping for bday/xmas/Mother's Day gifts for their Mom.  She takes them shopping for gifts for other members of her family.

I take the kids shopping for Dad for Father's Day/bday/Xmas  and for gifts for his family/my family (BM used to until DH and I got married).  Dad takes the kids shopping for me.  

The kids like to handmake cards and they typically make cards for all 3 of us.  

Last Mother's Day, the kids wanted to do a flower arrangement for their Mom so we went shopping for flowers and I helped them put everything together.  They insisted on making two arrangements which was no big deal, we had enough flowers and I have tons of vases....but it turned out, they made one of them for me.  It was very nice. 

In your example of WWYD if a SK made a card and wanted to give it to SM and not BM?  Well, I'd assume they were really young because most older kids would understand how hurtful that could be.  And as such, I'd thank the child very much but explain that it would be great if we could make another card too.  So that everyone had a card on that special day.


EmilyJ604
by on Feb. 11, 2013 at 8:12 AM
1 mom liked this

I used to take sd to buy her bm stuff for mothers day and then bm started saying stuff like yea my ex still cant get over me he still buys me stuff for mothers day.......my sd was very upset because bm never told her thank you so we quit buying her stuff......Some people are insane

Dana333810
by on Feb. 11, 2013 at 8:25 AM

 

Quoting progressandjoy:

Just to get this out there, this post is not Mother’s Day specific – it’s about holiday cards in general.

 

With Valentine’s Day fast approaching, I’ve been thinking about holiday cards. Easter, Mother’s Day, May Day (when I was little we left baskets of flowers on family members porches), Father’s Day, etc.

 

My questions for you guys are – what do you do regarding holiday (Mother’s Day, Valentine’s Day, Christmas, ect) cards? Do you make cards for BM and her family? DH has SS make one for his Momma. Does BM have the kids make cards for you? Not for me, I am not his Mom. Do your SK give you the cards they make at school? No, but ODD makes stuff for her Step Dad and Step Mom. Do they have the option to make multiple cards for multiple parents at school? At ODD's school they do, because her teacher knows she has a BM and SD, a BF and a SM who are all very active in her life. Do you think holiday cards are important or have any significance? Eh, not really. It's just nice to have the memorabilia. What would you do if your SK refused to give a card to BM and wanted to give it to you instead (in this case, a Mother's Day card)? I'd probably ask him what the heck his problem was lol.

 

progressandjoy
by Silver Member on Feb. 11, 2013 at 8:41 AM

We have an on and off relationship with BM, although right now, she’s been downright friendly towards me (not so much to DH). She’s making Valentine’s Cards for SS to pass out to his classmates, but I was thinking of making some cards that he can pass out to his grandparents. BM asked if she could take SS for part of next weekend (we get him every weekend) and take him to visit her mom. I thought it would be a nice gesture to make a few extra Valentine’s cards for BM and her mom.  


 

Quoting dfaley1066:

It depends on your relationship with the BM I think. My first marriage I got along with the BM and we would exchange cards and gifts for Christmas and Mother's Day. My husband and I don't get along with the BM so we don't exchange.
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