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BM causing major problems

Posted by on Feb. 25, 2013 at 1:59 PM
  • 38 Replies

BM has been causing major problems for the past 6 months.  She drops the kids off whenever she feels like it; doesnt' come back for days and then downs my husband and myself to the girls.  The oldest SD wrote a letter to myself and her father that stated how much she basically hates us; will deal with me if I ever tell her to do anything else etc.  It was a pretty bad letter.  My husband and I feel that both the girls need counseling but we can't force them to come over and spend time with us if they don't want to.  Any thoughts

by on Feb. 25, 2013 at 1:59 PM
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Replies (1-10):
faerie75
by Platinum Member on Feb. 25, 2013 at 2:07 PM

 get a court order.

MommySabs
by Gold Member on Feb. 25, 2013 at 2:56 PM
What faerie said
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whatIknownow
by Ruby Member on Feb. 25, 2013 at 3:09 PM

ok I'm totally confused. In the beginning of your post you said "She drops the kids off whenever she feels like it; doesnt' come back for days", and then later on you said "both the girls need counseling but we can't force them to come over and spend time with us if they don't want to."  These two sentences seem inconsistent to me.

how much time do the girls spend at your house? What is the parenting schedule supposed to be? who has custody? Is there a court order? how old are the girls?

Why does the older SD say she hates you? What are her specific complaints?

DDDaysh
by on Feb. 25, 2013 at 3:17 PM

 What does the court order say about parenting time?  Does he have one? 

How old are the children? 

Over the last year, can you document how many days BM has had the children vs your DH? 

nia568
by on Feb. 25, 2013 at 3:44 PM

The children are 12 and 15 we have them over 60% of the time but we've gone back to court at least every other month and she will not follow the order. He has them every Tues & Thursday after school until 8:30 and every other weekend. What's so bad is that she talks so negatively about me and my husband the girls beleive what she is saying and they have no respect for me or their dad. 

nia568
by on Feb. 25, 2013 at 3:47 PM

We have one she refuses to follow.  One day she even dropped them off in the freezing cold on our porch and left  and didn't return until 3 days later

nia568
by on Feb. 25, 2013 at 3:52 PM

She only drops them off when she needs us to keep them and then stops and tells us they don't want to come over.  But then 2 days later she drops them off again.  She then says they don't want to be over our house.  The oldest SD wrote a letter stating how much she dislikes me and has no respect for her father and hates being at our house.  We don't want to force them to come over but she continues to drop them off whenever she needs a babysitter and will not follow the court order.

nia568
by on Feb. 25, 2013 at 3:53 PM

We have one that was recently amended last November but she refuses to follow it. 

shanlee42
by Silver Member on Feb. 25, 2013 at 4:01 PM
You said BD has them 60% but Tu and Th evenings and every other weekend isn't 60%. Do you mean BM has them Tu, Th, and EOW?

Quoting nia568:

The children are 12 and 15 we have them over 60% of the time but we've gone back to court at least every other month and she will not follow the order. He has them every Tues & Thursday after school until 8:30 and every other weekend. What's so bad is that she talks so negatively about me and my husband the girls beleive what she is saying and they have no respect for me or their dad. 

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shanlee42
by Silver Member on Feb. 25, 2013 at 4:02 PM
Oh and if you use the quote button to respond to specific posts it will help us follow along!
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