I am a BM and an SM so I can understand things from both sides.
BF recently started dating a girl about 6 months ago. Very quickly, they moved in together. When they first started dating, I (as BM) went and introduced myself to her and gave her my contact info in case she needed to reach me for something regarding DS. I told her that it was important to me for DS to see us all getting along in a positive manner.
A few weeks later, she emailed me weighing in her opinion on an argument that BF and I were having. My new DH and I were thinking of moving an extra 10-15 minutes away from BF to get DS into a better school district. BF through a hissy fit because of the driving. Drama ensued, and I did not appreciate his GF weighing in on such a major argument so early in the game when she clearly did not know the background of the situation and why we were contemplating such a move (mainly for school district purposes).
Anyway, that caused a tiff between us back in September and I have never been able to get things on the right foot. I have tried doing a handwritten apology, I have tried asking her to dinner twice, I have tried inviting her to my son's events and including her in communication, I have been flexible with time given to DH so that DS can go to his girlfriend's daughter's b-day party -- I have tried most of everything.
The problem is that BF and I are not in a good place, and we never have been since our divorce. So, of course, I have been painted as the devil in every situation. I trully do want to have a good relationship with this woman, I am just losing hope that it is possible. I feel like none of my good deeds get me anywhere.
So... SM's.... can you tell me... what would you like to see from BM to get your relationship to a better place?